


Bound to Bloom

by DazzledGhosts



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alpha Keith (Voltron), Alpha Shiro (Voltron), Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alpha/Omega, Healing, M/M, Mpreg, Mutual Pining, Omega Lance (Voltron), Omega Verse, Past Rape/Non-con, Pining, Rape Recovery, Rape/Non-con Elements, Smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-28
Updated: 2018-04-04
Packaged: 2018-12-20 11:27:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 7
Words: 46,474
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11919927
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DazzledGhosts/pseuds/DazzledGhosts
Summary: While rescuing Shiro, Lance was captured by the Galra. Weaponless and alone. They assumed that Lance would be fine. He would survive like Shiro since he was an alpha. Oh how tragically wrong they were. In the months of searching, team Voltron finally finds video evidence of Lance. But not like they had ever seen him before. Lance was treated like an omega. Bound and forced to please Lotor and put on display for galaxies to witness.In his absence, Keith and Shiro, the alpha pair, find themselves aching for Lance. Their entire relationship as an alpha couple flourished in his presence. Without him, they were crumbling.And then they find him. They rescue him after seven months only to learn the tragedies Lance endured. Beaten, starved, assaulted... impregnated with Lotor's child only to lose it.Keith and Shiro find themselves wanting to heal Lance. Not because they discover he's an omega. But because of who Lance was to them. Even wounded and fragile, they find themselves drawn to the Blue Paladin.Lance gave them all a home. Now it was time to do the same.---A story about healing. About overcoming the aftermath of violence and the most vile of prejudices.





	1. The Loss

**Author's Note:**

> I want to start this off with an apology: This is an incredibly dark story. My work usually revolves around breaking omegaverse stereotypes. So I wanted to start his chapter off heavily entrenched in all the baggage of the omegaverse and then chip away at it. 
> 
> A lot of awful things that happen. Lance is treated worst than any human omega. He loses all control of his life and his body. But I can guarantee this: Lance is strong. 
> 
> This is about reclaiming yourself after enduring incredible hardships. About how love and patience can yield fruit.
> 
> I have several chapters of this already written but I hesitate. Because I believe in consent being the ultimate form of eros. What happens to Lance is not to be romanticized. And if it appears that I am, I will stop writing this story and delete it. 
> 
> My intentions are to show that violent things happen to people. And that it's not ok. But if you have support, care, and time, you can start to heal.

“Shiro!”

They had found him. Bruised and exhausted, but it was Shiro nonetheless. They all surrounded him, rejoicing amidst the battleground.

“We looked everywhere for you!” Keith held the tightest. The two alpha lovers trembled at one another’s touch.

“We never stopped looking!” Lance added with a large toothy grin. But it fell on deaf ears.

“We need to get going!” Allura stopped the tender moment.

“Princess, what are you doing here?” Shiro looked up with worry.

“She’s the only one who can withstand Haggar’s attacks!” Pidge chimed in.

“We can continue this touching moment later! We need to leave before the Galra realize what we’ve done.”

“Too late!” Lance saw the figures of both sentries and Galra approach them. He pulled out his bayard and shot several down.

Keith grabbed Shiro and helped carry the wounded alpha.

“Thank you, Keith.”

“Don’t mention it.”

They all ran. Feet pushing as fast as possible, clattering against the metal floors of the Galra ship.

“That door will get us to our ship!” Pidge guided them.

“It’s locked!” Hunk got there first, pounding on the hard surface.

“Let me!” Pidge started to do what she did best and hack away.

“Hurry up!” Keith growled as their attackers got closer.

“I’m trying!”

“Don’t worry, I got this!” Lance had his bayard out again, firing away. Bodies crumbling one after another, living up to his name of sharpshooter.

But there was one offender that his gun couldn’t hinder. A druid. The hooded figure raised its hand, black energy surging into a sphere. Lance saw where it was aimed.

Right as the two alphas who had just been reunited.

“Keith! Shiro! Look out!”

He didn’t think. Just moved as fast as his legs carried him. He took the blast. All of it. It wasn’t just the sheer force of it that hurt him. It was the burning and singeing of every part of his body. Like his life force was being pulled out of him, leaving him bone dry.

His bayard clattered onto the floor, back to its original shape. His own body slumped, immobile.

“Lance!” Hunk cried, moving towards his friend.

But there were more druids now. Their blasts becoming like a wall between Lance and his teammates.

“I’m in! But we don’t have much time.” Pidge finally opened the door.

“Wait… what about Lance?”

Allura’s eyes fell onto his bayard, right at her feet. She bent down and grabbed it.

“There’s no time…” she motioned them to the door.

“But… but Lance…” Shiro couldn’t move on his own. He couldn’t go to the blue paladin.

“If we want to survive, we must go! We’ll be back for him!” She was afraid. They had just found Shiro. And if they stayed, they would all fall. The guilt tore away at her but the fear even more consuming.

“He’s weaponless! You have his bayard!” Hunk was aghast.

“Guys… the doors are closing!” Pidge didn’t know what to do.

They all gave Lance one last look. His blue eyes lidded, conscious enough to realize that he was being left behind.  But he couldn’t move. Everything hurt and his mouth tasted like copper. He watched as they turned their faces away. Their backs becoming smaller as they rushed out. The doors shut tight.

He was alone. Weaponless. Companionless.

Alone.

\---

“Shiro… how are you feeling?” Keith was there when the alpha woke up.

“Lance… where’s Lance?” he remembered how the paladin’s body looked so lifeless on the floor of the ship. How those blue eyes looked back at them.

_Don’t leave me._

“We… we couldn’t save him…”

“What will they do to him?” Shiro remembered only sparks of being with the Galra. The pain and the fear all stained by hopelessness.

“Shiro… Lance is an alpha! He’ll be fine!”

“I was an alpha… that didn’t stop them from…” he looked at his metal arm.

“We’ll find him. We just need you to heal.”

\---

And Shiro did heal. The pods made sure of that. But when they went to look for Lance, he was gone. Not a single shred of a trail. The Galra ship that took him vanished, taking every trace of the blue paladin with him.

They looked. Days stretched into weeks. Weeks became months. Seven months trickled by and all of them could feel the weight of that time.

And it was showing. Keith and Shiro’s usually tender relationship began to crumble. Yes they were both alphas, but they had such a soft and caring dynamic. Had being the key word.

They both knew that Lance had moved to shield them. That Lance wouldn’t have been a lifeless lump left behind on that Galra ship if only they had sensed the attack. Their friend, the first one who accepted their relationship as two alphas, abandoned.

It was hard being two alphas. The desire to dominate was constant. Neither of them could truly mate or bond with one another. It had become tense between them. Their entire relationship was forged in Lance’s presence. He had been there through all of it with them. Not a part of the bond, mind you, but a pillar holding it up just by being close. In every momentous moment of their relationship, Lance had supported them. Been near by and that in of itself soothed. He put everything to place. His absence left them unbalanced.

He knew how to build a family. Under his displays of overconfidence, there was heart and warmth. Lance’s attempts at humor would ease everything. His playful banter softened everyone’s hard edges. Not just Shiro and Keith, but the whole ship. Lance was their glue. And without him, everything felt hollow. All at once, they felt incredibly alone. But they didn’t know his role until it was too late. Until he was gone.

Was he even alive? What had they done to him?

Allura became the blue paladin. They continued fighting against Zarkon.

And at some point, they had given up hope on finding Lance. It didn’t mean they stopped looking. Just that they had failed Lance and accepted it.

\---

They attacked a small fleet of Galra ships. With their Blade of Marmora alliance, they had heard there was good intel there. A general in their ranks. But they found nothing. Just a collection of data that Pidge had to shift through.

\---

Lance’s face was on the screen while Pidge did a facial scan. Hunk was beside the beta, fiddling with some electronics just for the sake of doing something.

“You still haven’t given up…” Keith said, walking into the room. He sounded so weary. The photo of Lance was one of him smiling. It hurt to see when the real Lance had been gone so long.

“I know we haven’t found anything… but…” she trailed.

Allura and Coran both entered the room. They saw the face of the once blue paladin on the screen. No amount of time made the pain less.

“Guys… I know it’s useless. But… what if…”

Pidge was interrupted as the screen flashed.

“Wait… is that…?” Hunk leaned in.

“It’s a video file!” she gasped. Quickly she scuttled to the control panel. She pressed play.

It was just a mass of Galra bodies. Violet and huddled.

“What’s this have to do with Lance?” Keith leaned in impatiently.

“Hold on! There’s sound. Let me turn the volume up!”

Static…

And then.

“To think your companions thought you to be an alpha! How laughable!” a voice they didn’t know but clearly Galra. “Your body is clearly nothing but an omega! Oh what a smell!”

“What is this?” Keith watched for a sign of Lance. Anything would have done. Just a bit of tan. A glimpse of brunette hair.

“Your friends have abandoned you.”

The bodies parted. And there he was, but in a way they had never seen him.

He was completely naked. Arms and legs chained, spreading his limbs apart.

“What… what are they?”

“They haven’t… they’ll find me!” It was Lance’s voice. His voice that was always so playful was now just an echo of fear.

“Will they? Did you know, my sweet blue paladin, that they have replaced you?”

“... What?” The camera zoomed into that tan face. Blue eyes wide with hurt.

A violet hand grabbed his chin.

“They have a new blue paladin. You’re not needed. They won’t be coming for you.”

“You’re lying!” He tried to wrench his face out of that grasp.

“They took your bayard didn’t they? Left you defenseless.” Galras circling Lance like they were stalking their prey.

“They… they didn’t mean to…”

“Leaving behind their sweet omega for us.” They all laughed.

“Wait… Lance is an alpha… what are they…?” Keith interjected.

“And what a sweet omega! Just look at how your swallowing up your new toys!” The camera panned down as the Galra grabbed Lance’s legs. He spread the long, slender limbs apart. There were things stuffed inside the once blue paladin. Slick spilling.

“No! Don’t!”

It dawned on them what was happening.

“Oh god… Oh god I can’t watch this…” Hunk turned away.

“They’re not… they’re not going to…” Keith couldn’t tear his eyes off the screen. This was surreal. It was impossible.

“And you’re going into heat just for us!”

“I’m not… no… don’t!!!”

They hoisted the Cuban’s body up like he was a doll.

“I can’t!” Allura hid her face into Coran’s shoulder.

“We can’t let Shiro see this!” Keith was trembling. His heart was sinking. He was drowning. His Lance… his annoying but ever accepting Lance.

“See what?”

Shiro walked in, towel around his neck from training.

“Please stop! No!!” Lance’s voice cried out.

The alpha dropped his towel at the sound. He hadn’t heard Lance’s voice in so long. But he never dreamed of it being so full of fear and pain.

“How sweet! Is it the blue paladin’s first time? First omega heat shared? What an honor!”

Shiro’s face paled a the implication of those words. It happened before the alpha had time to protest or turn his eyes away.

The Lance on the screen was impaled by Galra cock. The difference in their sizes obscene. He screamed and tried to fight. But there were more violet limbs on him now, pushing him down. Forcing his body to swallow whole. Blood spilling more than slick.

“No… you’re tearing me! Stop!” the voice so broken.

“What… what is this?” Shiro’s breath was stolen from him. His chest turning cold, like heart pumped ice instead of blood.

“Turn it off!” Keith yelled and Pidge.

She paused it but the frame froze on Lance’s body and face contorted in pain. A Galra fully inside him. Bright red staining the inside of his thighs.

“No… no what is this?! Is this a sick joke? That can’t be… that’s not…” Shiro had been their prisoner. But he had never endured anything like that. And Lance… _their_ Lance was enduring it all. His hands, both flesh and metal trembled.

“Destroy it!” Allura weeped.

“Wait… I… I think I can find him. This video is old, but there’s something else in the data…” Pidge was shaking. “It’s… it’s a stream? A live stream! I can trace this back!”

A few strokes on the control panel and another video appeared. It was the same room, empty save for one slumped figure.

“Is that…?”

Lance was on the floor, chains on his legs.

“He’s still alive!” Keith felt like this was a dream.

“Wake up, Blue…” a voice off screen growled. A Galra walked to Lance’s body. Lance, who was always so tall with his back straight, looked so small. He groaned and sat up. The quality of the video wasn’t the best, but bruises still apparent on his neck and chest. “Open your mouth.”

“Please, Lotor… It hurts.”

“Is that… the prince?” Allura was beside Pidge now. “Where is this video coming from?”

“It’s not that far off! We can get there is a couple vargas from where we are.”

A booted foot slammed into Lance’s abdomen. They all flinched at the sound their companion made. He slumped onto the floor, his chest heaving, trying to breathe.

“You know how I feel about you talking back to me. Now come on, it’s time to put on a show for the galaxies to see. The precious blue paladin… or should I say ex-paladin, on his knees before the Galra prince.”

“Let’s go get him back!”

\---

It took days to plan. Keith wanted to barge in immediately and grab Lance. But they would fail if they tried. It was heart wrenching to wait.

But it seemed that Shiro was just as impatient. Sometimes Keith would find Shiro watching Lance’s stream. As if he could protect the boy through his gaze. Most of the time, Lance was unconscious. And when he wasn’t, they would drag him down and humiliate him. Force him to open his mouth and his body. Lance never resisted, like he was broken.

Neither alpha could turn off the feed when that happened. Their eyes wide with horror as Lance was made into a doll. The sounds that his body would make burned them with shame. Lance wouldn’t weep. Not like he had in the first video they saw of him. No, he would gasp and grunt as his body was taken against his will. At times he would be completely silent. The audio filled only with the grunts of his assailant, Lotor, and the wet squelching sounds of Lance’s body being thrust into.

They did this. All of them. They left him there for that monster.

The guilt ate them up alive.

\---

They infiltrated the ship using cloaked pods and the black lion. It was a lot of hacking and patient sneaking but they made it. Pidge found the control room and guided Shiro and Keith to Lance’s room.

After months of searching, of being afraid, they were finally going to have Lance back.

The door opened.

The sweetest scent of lilacs and sea salt hit them. The scent of an omega. And in the midst of the perfume was one sleeping Lance. His body draped onto the hard surface. A single tattered blanket barely covering his lanky shape.

“Lance!” They both ran to him. At the sound of his name, eyes opened. “Lance it’s us!”

“No…”

“Lance?” Shiro stretched out his fleshy hand, wanting to feel that their companion was really there with his real body.

The Cuban’s body was completely covered in violent bruises. His thighs a mosaic of splotches. Purple and blue in the shape of fingers having dug deep.

“No! Lotor, no! I’m done with these games! Stop it! I know they won’t come for me!” He backed away as far as his chains would let him. They clattered against the floor.

“It’s us…” Keith’s words so strained with desperation.

“Stop it! Stop using their faces! Their voices!” So full of terror.

“We’re here to take you home,” Shiro knelt beside him.

“No! No, it hurts more when they’re gentle!” Lance gripped his hair in his fists, as if trying to block everything out. “It’s easier when they’re cruel… Make them be cruel,” he whimpered. “This hurts more.”

“We’re real, Lance!” Keith tugged and his arm. Lance smacked him away.

“No! No! I’m a good omega! I won’t run away, Lotor! So please stop this! I’ll do what you want! I’ll use my mouth! I promise I’ll make it feel good...” His voice so ragged. “Just don’t make me see them.”

“Shiro… This…” Keith couldn’t get the words to leave his mouth. _This is wrong._

“Let’s get him out of here.” Shiro used his mechanical hand and effortlessly tore the chains like they were made of paper.

“Don’t…”

“Shh… it’s ok,” Shiro tried to soothe as he scooped up Lance gently, like he was cradling something so precious. But Lance fought back.

“No! Don’t touch me! Shiro wouldn’t touch me!”

“What are you talking about, Lance? Why wouldn’t I…?”

“They hate me! You’ve made that clear, Lotor. I don’t need to be reminded anymore.” It stung them both to hear that.

“Keith… Keith you hold him, I think someone is coming.” He handed Lance over to the smaller alpha.

“Put me down! Don’t touch me using his body!”

“Lance, it’s really me! It’s Keith.”

“Keith hates me.”

“I… I don’t…”

“Shh!” Shiro hushed them.

Keith clamped his hand onto Lance’s mouth. Even through his armor, he could feel Lance’s heat. His senses telling him that this was an omega. He had heard in the stream and videos that they called him omega. But he didn’t think they meant it. That they were just degrading him. But this scent… this softness...

“It looks like we’re in the clear. Let’s go.”

Lance didn’t make their escape easy. He flailed and tried to bite Keith.

“Pidge, we’re almost to the dock. We’ll meet you back in the castle.”

They clamored into the black lion. Doors slamming shut.

“Let me go!” Lance yelped once Keith’s hands were off him. “Put me back! Lotor, I didn’t run away! I swear!”

“Lance… this is real.”

“They would never come for me…”

“Why would you say that?”

“You know why, Lotor! How many times do you want me to say it! I’m nothing! I’m a whore! Are you happy? I hate you,” he hissed and curled into a tight ball.

He was broken, but not enough to stop his mouth from talking back. Keith found that relieving in the sea of all the hurtful words coming out of his mouth.

“You’ve punished me enough, Lotor. How many times do I have to say I’m sorry…” The alphas stiffened. Keith and Shiro didn’t like hearing Lance apologize to Lotor, even if the Galra wasn’t there with them. It felt like he was. Like his fingers still clutched tight into Lance’s long neck.

“We’re close! Hold on!” Shiro charged the black lion, the castle in sight.

“See! It’s the castle…” Keith tried to be reassuring. But he wasn’t good at this. It felt awkward and strained. In the past, it was Lance who did the consoling.

Lance gasped like he was stung.

“What’s wrong, Keith?” Shiro didn’t like that sound.

“Is that… oh god… Blue?” Lance felt his lion. Felt her reach out to him. There were so many illusions that Lotor had created and dangled at him. But the Galra prince could never create the sensation of Blue. Her touch was always soft and comforting. She made him feel warm.

This was real.

This was really Shiro and Keith.

“Lance?”

It dawned on him how naked he was. He tried to cover his body, but his limbs were lanky and thin.

He had dreamed of being rescued in the beginning. He wanted nothing more than to see Shiro and Keith burst through those doors. But that was before he was reduced to what he was. He never wanted them to see him like this. So filthy. So utterly omega. So used.

“No… don’t look at me...” A whisper that the attentive alphas heard. “Please… don’t look at me.”

The black lion settled into the hanger. The weight of gravity shaking them.

“Lance here…” Shiro offered a hand.

“You don’t know what you’ve done. Send me back!”

“What…?” Keith incredulous. How could he want to return to that hell hole where they violated him? “Do you hear yourself? We all risked our lives for you!”

“Lotor won’t let me go! He’s going to find me and then he’ll find all of you! You don’t need me. Just put me back!”

“Lance… Lance of course we need you,” Shiro tried to touch but Lance flattened himself against the wall of the lion’s cockpit.

He was afraid. Afraid of Shiro and Keith.

He wasn’t sure if it was rage or grief that made him act so brashly, but Keith grabbed Lance and dragged him out of the Lion.

“No! Stop! Stop it! I’m… I’m naked! Stop!” He didn’t want the rest of the team to see his body. It was covered in bites in all sorts of places. Nothing left to the imagination. This was a body thoroughly used.

“Keith… Wait. Here, use this.” Shiro extended his own jacket over the omega’s shoulders. They only hid his upper body, but those long tan legs were open to everyone’s sight, stained in wounds.

“Lance…!” Hunk saw him first. “Lance! I can’t believe you’re back, Buddy!” He stopped fighting Keith. He was afraid that they would see his body should he fall out of the alpha’s arms.

“This isn’t real… this can’t be real…” Lance whispered.

“He needs medical attention… Coran, can you help?” Shiro being the diligent leader.

“Of course! Take him to the medical bay.”

\---

They put Lance inside of a pod. The machine whirred and analyzed his condition. Even when asleep, his face had echoes of pain in it.

“Oh…” Coran looked at the screen.

“What… what’s wrong with him? Did they do anything to him?” Shiro still mourned the loss of his arm. Had they changed Lance?

“Did they… Did they make him an omega?” Pidge was a beta, but she could still smell him.

“No… no it seems he’s always been one.”

“What? You mean he lied about being an alpha?”

“Keith… Lance never actually said his secondary gender. He never talked about it. We all just… assumed.” Hunk had known Lance the longest.

“Why hide it?” Pidge studied Lance’s resting face.

Both Shiro and Keith knew why. They could smell it. Lance’s body, though contained inside that pod, smelled so sweet.

“Oh no… Oh no, Lance…” Coran sounded so broken.

“What’s wrong?” Allura asked.

The Altean’s face was pale as he slowly uttered the words.

“He was with child…”

A thick silence filled the room, disrupted only by the hum of the healing pods. Moments trickled by like molasses. Even breathing felt too loud.

“What… what do you mean?” Shiro was the only one brave enough to ask.

“At some point Lance… Lance was pregnant.”

“ _Was_?” Keith strided up to the pod, hands shaking. Lance’s chest rising and falling in his induced sleep.

“For almost three of your earth months. And then…” his voice faltered. “And then it seems he sustained a trauma to his womb. I’m not sure how Lance survived it. The child must have perished.”

Hunk couldn’t endure anymore. Heavy tears spilled from his eyes.

“We did this…” Keith pressed his hands against the glass. “We let this happen…”

\---

“Watching him won’t make him heal any faster, Keith.” The red paladin was so lost in thought he didn’t hear Shiro walk in.

“I just… want to be here when he wakes up. He seemed to think this was all an illusion.”

“Don’t you think your scowl would frighten him?”

“I’m not…” Shiro was beside him now. They both looked at the sleeping paladin.

“I daydreamed of saving him… That we would all go back to how we were. Sure I would sympathize with him. I spent a lot of time with the Galra. I thought that would heal him. But this… this is worse than anything they did to me. I’m a useless leader…”

“Shiro… no…”

“I didn’t fight for him. I let him stay there. We took his bayard. He had nothing. He thought we hated him…”

“What did they do to him? He was so convinced we didn’t want him.”

“Can you blame him?” Coran appeared through the doorway. “I don’t mean to pry young paladins, but we all took him for granted. Ever since we lost him, I’ve been thinking of how we all let m’boy down. Weren’t we all distant with him?” He adjusted the monitor to check Lance’s vitals. “We shouldn’t have made it possible for Lotor to tear him apart so easily.”

“What? We were nothing but nice to him?” Keith knew that to be a lie. They weren’t cruel to him. But distant and passive for sure. He gave them warmth and smiles but their gestures seemed empty in comparison. And that was enough. Lotor exploited Lance’s loneliness. A loneliness they had all gifted him.

“Looks like he’s ready to come out!” Coran approved of Lance’s vitals. It had been five days.

The pod shuddered and released him. He grunted and tumbled into Keith’s arms.

“What…? Lotor?”

Blue eyes widened. Recognition settled in. Lance shoved Keith away.

“What are you…?”

“Lance, Lance it’s ok! We’re here.” Shiro placed a reassuring arm on Keith’s shoulder having seen the hurt on his partner’s face from the rejection.

“Where’s Lotor?”

Keith was tired of hearing that name.

“There is no Lotor, you idiot!”

Lance flinched at the raised voice. Instinctively he shut his eyes tight and hunched himself over, bearing his neck. Both of them remembered seeing that behavior in the stream. It was ingrained in him now. To be an obedient omega. Keith immediately felt regret at his volume and choice of words.

\---

Lance didn’t know how to assimilate. He was jumpy and distrusted everything. Almost like he thought all of it was just another cruel joke played out by Galra. They were all impatient for their old Lance. After months of waiting, they wanted him back. The Lance that made them smile and took all the harshness out of the air. He wasn’t there anymore. The Galra left behind a broken human.

After days of waiting, Shiro and Keith went to check on Lance, they found him on the floor of his room. He was huddled there on the hard surface. Shiro asked gently why only to learn that Lance was only permitted to sit or rest on the floor.

“But… you’re not there anymore, Lance. You’re here with us. You don’t have to obey their rules.” Shiro could tell that Lance wasn’t truly with them. A part of the omega was still trapped in that room, bound to the Galra. Tormented.

“Omega’s don’t sleep in beds. They’re only fucked in them.”

Keith took a sharp breath. It was still strange for him to acknowledge Lance as an omega. From what they gathered, Lance used suppressants. He hid his secondary gender so well without ever needing to lie. And now, to hear him openly admit it, and so crudely, was so jarring by contrast.

“There’s… there’s nothing wrong with being an omega, Lance.” Shiro was perhaps a bit impatient. He moved to touch Lance’s shoulder, like he would have in the past. But Lance bolted back from the touch as if anticipating a blow.

“I don’t understand… I didn’t? I didn’t do anything wrong?”

“We’re not… we’re not going to hurt you!” Keith saw it. The expectation of pain in those blue eyes.

They weren’t helping Lance. They were just confusing him, making him recoil into himself further and further.

\---

Hunk had better luck. He wasn’t an alpha like Keith or Shiro. He was softer and after a few well placed suggestions, drew Lance out of his room. Hunk guided him to the hall where they all ate their meals and even managed to get the Cuban into a chair.

“I’m suppose to sit on the floor.” Lance tried to argue.

“No, Lance. You belong here with us. Why would you sit there? We want to see your face and talk to you.”

“But… but that’s not what I’m for…?”

“You’re not ‘for’ anything. You’re, you, Lance. And that’s all that matters.”

He was finally convinced into the chair. Hunk gave him food and water. They all clamored around, watching Lance. He didn’t seem unnerved which confused them. But then they remembered, Lance wasn’t given any semblance of privacy. There were always eyes on him back on that ship.

“Lance… I want to return this to you.” Allura placed the blue bayard onto the table.

Lance stared at it. His lips thinning into a line.

“I… I can’t take it.”

“Lance, it belongs to you.”

“No… I’m not a paladin anymore. I can’t…”

“You’ve always been the Blue Paladin! I only piloted blue in your absence. She wouldn’t speak to me. Not like she did with you. Now you can…”

“No… You’re not getting it. I can’t.”

“What… what does that even mean?” Keith sat on the table, arms crossed and looking sternly.

“She won’t… she won’t want me.”

“Lance… she missed you. She would show me how you flew her and I couldn’t even come close.”

He didn’t seem convinced. Instead he offered food to the mice sitting in front of him.

\---

Two weeks passed. Keith and Shiro continued to fight. They shoved one another and growled. A part of them hoped that finding Lance would bring and end to their bickering. But it proved to be even more strenuous.

Their pillar was broken. They couldn’t lean on him anymore. If anything, they needed to support Lance instead.

They wondered if the reason they worked in the first place was because Lance was an omega that stayed close to them. But that wouldn’t make sense either. The suppressants he took back then made him indistinguishable from a beta. And even then, they thought him to be an alpha. What they wanted was Lance for Lance’s sake. Not an omega. Putting an omega in the mix of two alphas only made things more difficult. Now that Lance was back and without suppressants, the two of them were more agitated. He smelled sweet and it awoke something primal in them. They hated that their biology could influence them this way.

\---

Sirens blared. Lotor was hailing them a communication. He wanted to talk but demanded to see Lance. They collectively decided in Lance’s stead, that it wouldn’t happen. The boy stood in the corner of the room while they all bickered with Lotor.

“Enough of this! Blue... remember what I promised to do if you didn’t listen to me.”

And so Lance ignored them all and walked into the view of camera, letting himself be seen by the man who imprisoned him and tortured him. They wondered what it was that the prince threatened.

“That’s my good omega. Did you like the gift I gave you?”

“I… I don’t…?”

“Oh you’re beautiful, but you’ve never been too bright. I let those alphas take you. How else do you think you escaped?”

“What are you…?” Keith was furious. They had carefully planned to free Lance. Shiro and Keith carried Lance out of that hellish ship themselves.

“We rescued him. You didn’t let us do anything.” Shiro seemed calm, but his fists were clenched tightly.

“Blue, on your knees.”

Immediately, he slumped down, slamming on his knees before the projection of Lotor’s face. His body quaking and eyes wide with embarrassment.

“Lance! Get up!” Keith stared aghast.

“You see, I’ve trained him _thoroughly_ . Lance only does what _I_ want. He goes where _I_ want.”

“If that’s the case, then why release him?” Allura’s voice was strong.

“To show him once and for all, his place is with me. This is his punishment for losing _our child_ . Isn’t that right, Blue? You’ll see. No one can care for you. Not like _I_ can. I won’t even need to collect you myself. You’ll come running back to me, crying like you always do.”

Lance’s face turned bright red. He had a feeling they suspected what happened to him and his body. But for Lotor to openly admit that he carried the Galra Prince’s child made him want to weep in shame.

“It was… it was _your_ child?” Shiro’s face contorted and an almost snarl.

“You… you’re a monster!” Keith was right next to Shiro now. Both of them over the verge of growling. Their pheromones sharp even though Lotor couldn’t sense them.

“Tut, tut! That’s no way to speak about your companion’s mate!”

“He’s not your mate! You haven’t bonded him!” The thought of Lotor’s mark on Lance’ neck made Keith’s heart pound.

“For now. But you see, he’s going to come crawling back to me. He’s going to ask me himself to bite him in his soft neck. And oh… that’s right. He’s very soft to the touch but firm enough to take it rough. Isn’t that right, Blue?”

Keith felt his stomach churn whenever Lotor used his pet name for Lance.

Lance didn’t respond. He kept his gaze on the floor, his ears bright red.

“How are you holding up, my pet? Your omega body has grown accustomed to being taken so often. It must be _agony_ without me. How long until you beg your companions to fuck you?”

“Stop! Stop it! I never begged. I never wanted! You just did what you…”

“Blue… Silence.”

The words froze in Lance’s mouth. He strained to talk but found himself remembering all the punishments that followed disobeying a command.

“There… you know I hate it when you talk back. Your voice is very pretty but suited for moaning.”

“You’re disgusting.”

“Am I, Red Paladin? I’m just following our biological directive. As an alpha, be it of a lesser species, I’m sure you can relate. Blue is very enticing. Especially in a heat. Oh, remind me Blue: when is your next heat?”

“Forty quintents...” Roughly Forty days.

“You’ll learn that you’re just like myself in forty quintents. Perhaps even worst. I was kind enough to take Blue to be all my own after discovering him in the heap of Galra bodies. But it seems that you and your fellow Black Paladin are already vying for what’s mine. I don’t mind. I’ll share him with you this once.”

“We’re not…! We don’t…!”

“We would never do that to Lance,” Shiro was more collected than Keith.

“Oh… hear that, Blue?” Lotor laughed. “I was right! No one wants you there. Even when your sole purpose is to be fucked, no one will use you. Not even the paladins you desperately cried out for.”

“Please… please stop…” Lance hid his face in his hands. He didn’t want them to know it was their names he begged for.

“Remember…? You cried for them? ‘Shiro, please! Keith, make it stop’?” Lotor mocked. The two alphas stiffened. Knowing that Lance called for them stirred something in their chests. Was it a twisted sense of pride? Or sorrow that they weren’t there to save him? How could it be both?

“What was the purpose of your communication with us, Lotor? Was it just to harass my Blue Paladin? Rest assured, you will never get your hands on Lance again.” Allura used her commanding voice.

“Your Blue Paladin will never fly again. His wings are broken. The quintessence in his body was reshaped by the child he foolishly killed in his womb.”

“I didn’t kill him! You… you did that to him!” Something in Lance snapped.

“Blue, be silent!”

“No! No you forced him on me and then you took him away from me! I told you I couldn’t take more! That it would hurt him! But you still pushed! You did what you wanted because you’re an alpha pig that can only think with his cock and not his head, and now we’re childless!”

“Blue! Shut your mouth!”

“I loved him! He was mine! He was… he was…” There was a rage and sorrow in his chest that burned the fear away. It seemed that there was still a spark left in Lance. An anger that came to the surface at the memory of what he lost.

“You will regret your choice of words. When you’re back, I’m going to strap you down and fill your with my seed. You’ll give me not just one child for the one we’ve lost, but many. You’re mine, Blue. Mine.”

The transmission ended abruptly on Lotor’s end as the prince smashed his console in rage.

“He’s right…” Lance whispered.

“What…?” Keith snapped.

“I can’t be a paladin. Not after I lost our… our…” the words died as Lance choked back a sob.

The use of “our” made the air tense. It only set in stone that Lotor was the father of Lance’s unborn child. It made them seem like a pair. Like mates when Lotor did not deserve that title.

Shiro tried to comfort but Hunk was already there, kneeling next to Lance who was still on the ground from Lotor’s command.  

“Lance, I’m so sorry. You must be hurting so much, I’m so sorry.” His large hands cupped the back of the brunette’s head.

“He was mine… He was mine and Lotor took him away. He took everything away.”

“Shh… Lance. He didn’t take us away, did he?”

Lance pulled back.

“So many times I thought he did. He played so many games, I didn’t know what was real. Are you real, Hunk? Am I even here? How do I know that I’m not in Haggar’s dream? I want it to be real. I miss you…”

“Lance…” Allura was beside him now. “Lance, this is very much real. And I will never let them touch you. I’m sorry. I did this. I let this happen.”

“But if it’s real… then you all know. You know I’m an omega. You know what Lotor did. You know I lost my child. I don’t think I can bear that either. I think I’d rather be in another illusion.”

“How… how can you say that? You’d rather be with him than here?” Keith was never good with words, but at least his tone was soft.

“If I’m there, Lotor can’t hurt you. I don’t know what he’s planning but I do know when he’s playing a game. Me being here… it’s a game. And he’s good at games. If I’m there, I’m not a pawn.”

“Lance, you’re not a pawn.” Pidge was close now, trying to soothe.

“Then what am I? I can’t be a Paladin of Voltron. I can’t even be an omega here.”

“What…?” Shiro couldn’t quite understand that last part.

“Two of you are alphas. I have heat coming.”

“You can take suppressants again, Lance.” Shiro wanted to put his hand on Lance’s shoulder. But the way he pronounced ‘alpha’ made him reconsider.

“Actually… actually he can’t…” Pidge countered.

“What? Why not? If you’re out of them, I’m sure Coran can make more.” Keith stood closer to Shiro. Almost hoping he presence of another alpha would calm him. Even the thought of a heat was dizzying.

“Once an omega gets pregnant, their hormones change permanently,” Lance mumbled.

“He would have to take a lethal dose to stop a heat.” Pidge added.

“My purpose is to breed…” Lance said bitterly. “And I can’t even do that right…”

“Lance, no…” Hunk pulled him in tighter. The Cuban flinched at their bodies being pressed together but eased into it.

Keith and Shiro could only watch. They didn’t know how to comfort Lance. Not because there were incapable. There was a distance that Hunk and Pidge could easily breach but it seemed like miles for the alphas.


	2. The Dream

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So here's the second chapter. It's a bit long. And again, dark.
> 
> I'm still not completely sure I should be sharing or even writing this. 
> 
> But thank you if you give it a read. 
> 
> In this chapter we see more pain, but most importantly, we see healing and acceptance.

After a week, Hunk convinced Lance to sleep in a bed. Lance seemed afraid of the soft surface. He quivered and flinched every time the mattress would sink with weight. 

That night, while everyone slept, Lance woke up screaming louder than usual. His heart thudding in his head and his fists white from clenching the sheets. He left his room, a space that seemed suffocatingly small. His room back on Lotor’s ship was empty with high ceilings. 

He shuffled around the castle halls, passing Shiro’s room, until he found himself in the bridge. The ceiling was tall and the windows let him peek out into the vastness of space. 

Lance didn’t want sleep. He wanted to be numb and his nightmares were anything but. He sank onto the cold floor and pressed his forehead against the glass. 

“Lance?” 

He jumped and spun around, bearing his neck immediately. Eyes wrenched shut and hands behind him. 

“Lance, it’s alright… it’s just me.” Shiro lifted his arms, palms outward and empty. He heard footsteps pass his door and had a feeling it was Lance. It stung the way Lance reacted to his presence. He was anticipating punishment. 

Blue eyes peeked open. His face red with embarrassment. He hated bearing his neck. Especially to anyone in the castle. It implied submission. As if Lance was asking:  _ Mark me. Bond me. Mate me. _ But Lotor had trained him and his body acted on its own.

“S… sorry. I… I…” He was trying to think of an excuse and then gave up, shoulders slumping. He didn’t have one. 

“No, no, it’s my fault for scaring you.” Shiro shuffled awkwardly. He hadn’t gotten a chance to be alone with Lance. Perhaps he had done that intentionally. Lance’s new mannerisms reminded him of how he failed as the leader of Voltron. How he let someone younger than him suffer at the hands of the Galra so he, himself, could escape. But worst of all, it was how Lance smelled. Refreshingly sweet on his tongue. He didn’t entirely trust himself around Lance, which was strange. Shiro had perfect control over his alpha and never once desired an omega. 

“Couldn’t sleep?” he asked awkwardly.

“Oh… no… Uh… not sleepy I guess.” Lance use to talk so much more. His voice use to be playful. 

And from the bags under the omega’s eyes, Shiro knew he was lying. 

“Lance, you look exhausted.” 

“Caught me there… I can’t sleep. Whenever I close my eyes I’m back  _ there _ .”

“I… I was like that at first too…” Shiro knew that their experiences with the Galra were drastically different. But he tried anyway.

“Oh…?” Lance finally looked up. His eyes slightly hopeful and asking:  _ Does this end? _

“Yeah… I would wake up screaming. Or drenched in sweat. Sometimes I didn’t know where I was.”

“Did it stop?”

“For the most part, yes. I sometimes have nightmares, but I wake up. I know they’re not real. That I’m not there anymore and I’m safe.”

“What… what was it that did that? What did you do?” There was an ache in his voice. Lance wanted more than anything to feel safe. To not be on that ship where everything was stained purple and Lotor was his owner.

“Keith would ground me when I woke up confused or frightened.” Lance’s face fell instantly. He looked back down and Shiro knew he made a mistake.

“Oh… right… Yeah that makes sense.” 

That’s right. Lance didn’t have someone like Keith to hold him. More than ever, he seemed isolated from the rest of the team.

“You… you could ask Hunk?”

“No! Are you kidding me? Hunk looks like he’s going to cry whenever he sees me. I don’t want him hearing the stupid things I say when I think Lotor is on top of me.” Lance never snapped at Shiro. And Shiro saw regret and fear pass through Lance’s face. “Sorry… Sorry. Lotor always said I ran my mouth too much. I just… I don’t want to worry Hunk. He’s got enough to think about…” Shiro’s fist clenched at the mention of the Galran Prince. Over and over again, Lance spoke of him. He had become a part of Lance.

“Then… then do you want me…?”

“No… no… You don’t have to do that.”

But he wanted to. He wanted to bring back the Lance he remembered. He wanted to chase away Lotor’s shadow. The man still had a vice grip on Lance and it made Shiro see red. He missed the laughter in his voice when he wasn’t laughing. His confident stride. That lopsided smile. God, how he missed seeing it all. 

“Lance, I think it’s for the best. You need rest. You can’t be a Paladin without rest.”

“I’m not a Paladin though… How many times do I need to say it? I can’t fly Blue…”

“We’ll discuss that later. Right now you need rest. Lance, please come with me.” 

“But… but Keith…” 

“Keith won’t mind.” And Shiro knew he wouldn’t. He could tell that Keith missed how Lance would poke and tease. Or how Lance was soft when they needed him and strong when the moment called for it. But this Lance couldn’t do that. He was too frightened to overstep his bounds. They both wanted to heal him.

“No… I…”

“Please. Please, Lance.” 

It had been so long since Lance had been asked. Since someone pleaded him. Everything had been taken by force. So he couldn’t resist. He followed Shiro quietly through the halls of the castle. 

His door slid open. 

“Shiro… you back?” Keith sleepily murmured. He propped his head up, hair askew. And then his eyes fell on Lance’s hunched figure. Even though Lance and Shiro were close in height, Lance looked so small. His back rounded, one arm cradling the other, eyes downcast. 

Shiro didn’t need to say anything. Grey and violet eyes met and Keith understood. He lifted the covers and moved to the side. 

Shiro guided Lance without touching him. He extended his arm as a gesture. 

_ It’s alright. Climb in. _

Lance nervously crawled into the sheets. He sank down stiff, his back into the bed and his eyes staring straight up. 

Shiro followed. The mattress sank deep with the weight of his knee and Lance tensed up. Now he propped down an arm. The surface of the bed shifting again. Keith watched as Lance’s face tightened with anticipation of the worst. Beds reminded him of Lotor. How he would clench his eyes shut while the bed dipped under Lotor. And then the pain would begin. Shiro shifted again. Lance whined and bolted up.

“I can’t… I can’t sleep in a bed. I’m sorry.” 

“Lance… it’s ok.” Keith sat up slowly, rustling the sheets. Lance was between the two alphas.

“No… Lotor only took me to bed when he needed to punish me.”

“We’re not Lotor.” Keith tried to be gentle. Lotor’s name infuriated him. How it easily rolled out of Lance’s mouth. 

“We won’t ever hurt you, Lance.” Shiro couldn’t resist anymore. He put a hand on Lance’s shoulder. His fleshy one. Lance tensed as it brushed against his scent glands.

“I know you won’t. No one wants to do that to me other than Lotor.” How wrong Lance was. “And you’re not Lotor. But when I close my eyes I can feel him. I can smell him. I would say and do anything to keep him satisfied and just stop hurting me… I don’t want you to hear me beg.” Lance hugged his legs and sank his face into his knees. 

“Remember how I said I was the same? We’ll be here to ground you, Lance. Here…” Shiro grabbed Lance’s hand carefully. He took it and placed it against his large chest. “See… It’s me. It’s Shiro. And that…” Keith followed Shiro’s example and took Lance’s hand onto his chest. “That is Keith. We’ll never hurt you. So just try it for tonight. I won’t push you again if it doesn’t help.”

“Please?” Keith added. And there it was. Being asked and not forced. It made Lance’s chest warm. 

“I… I might say things that are disgusting. Please forget anything I say…” 

“No matter what, we will never think less of you.” 

Lance sank back into the bed. His palms felt warm from being pressed against firm chests. He pushed them against his own chest and curled onto his side, only to notice that he was face to face with Keith. Shiro was close behind. His hulking body had such a presence, Lance was aware of it even though he couldn’t see it. 

They both wanted to reassure Lance. The only way they could think of was through touch, but each movement on the soft surface made him hold his breath. So instead, they stayed still. Stayed close. Warmth permeated skin not through touch but proximity. And soon Lance fell asleep. His breaths deep and slow. 

Shiro and Keith on the other hand were wide awake. 

“This… this is worst than I could have ever imagined,” Shiro whispered. 

“I hate seeing him like this…” Keith added. Softly he put his hand onto Lance’s. The omega’s fists tightly clenched the sheets and he ground his teeth. The gesture somehow soothed Lance. His jaw laxed. Shiro pulled in closer, his body made Lance’s seem thin and scrawny. But his body did that to almost everyone in comparison.

“Keith… these seven months were frightening…”

“But this… this is somehow worst,” Keith finished. “Shiro… I’m going to say something that might sound crazy. You might get angry. You might not want to be near me anymore… but… but I want… I want…”

“You want Lance…?” he finished. 

“And… and you… The three of us. We fit together. I know it’s selfish…”

“No… no I agree. These months without him has been hard. I think you’ve noticed it too. We’re nothing like how we use to be. Always fighting and everything seems so empty. We use to be different. And that’s because he was there. I took that for granted. We were only able to pair because of him. I want him here, like this. Always.” A prosthetic hand nervously brushed Lance’s hair to the side. “And not because he’s an omega. In fact, this would be so much easier if he wasn’t.”

“Then… we both want the same thing?” There was such relief in the Red Paladin’s voice. 

“We should have done this sooner… I know that now.”

“We thought he was an alpha. The way he acted. He never submitted. He just did what he wanted. He  _ scolded _ me,” Keith said the latter with a soft laugh. “We were already two alphas… But… but I could…”

“You would still have him? I feel the same. Alpha, beta, or omega, Lance should be with us.”

“Will he want us?” Keith saw how Lance acted when approached. Even when Hunk, the gentlest of them, touched Lance there was fear. 

“We can try…”

“I just… I miss seeing him smile. Quiznak, I even miss him fighting with me.” 

Shiro reached over Lance. His hand touched his alpha lover’s face. 

“Me too…” 

Keith leaned into Shiro’s touch.

“Mmmm…” Lance moaned painfully in his sleep. “No… no…” he whined. They both stiffened. Shiro’s arm hovered in the air above the sleeping omega. Even though he wasn’t touching Lance, it seemed he had sensed the shift in weight and the warmth of the limb. In his dreams, that wasn’t Shiro’s arm hanging above him but the Galra prince. “Lotor, no!” Tan limbs started to thrash. “No! I can’t! You’ll hurt him! I’ll use my mouth! I’m good with my mouth!” 

“Lance… Lance it’s ok! You’re not there!” Shiro tried to wake him without touching him.

“Please don’t do this. I don’t choke anymore. You taught me. So please… Just fuck my mouth.”

Keith saw red. These were words that Lance had said to Lotor. Things he did for him. 

“No! Use my mouth! Don’t hurt him. Don’t hurt Taka...” Lance shot up before he could finish his sentence. It confused the two alphas. Whose name was going to leave his mouth? 

“Lance,” Keith sat up. But Lance couldn’t hear them. He was confused. This wasn’t Lotor’s bed. This wasn’t his empty room. The scents were all wrong and he was drenched in cold sweat. A quiver in his lungs made his breath shudder out. But most alarming of all, there was no child in his womb.

Hands touched his back and Lance spun around. 

“Lotor, no…” 

“I’m not him. He’ll never touch you.” Large arms wrapped around him. His face sank into a muscular chest. It smelled familiar and comforting. Another pair of arms, thinner but just as sincere, coiled around his waist. A warm but heavy head pressed into his shoulder. 

“We’ve got you.” Keith comforted.

“Where… where’s Lotor?”

“Not here. He’ll never be here.” Shiro soothed.

Pheromones seeped out. Shiro’s strong earthy scent. Keith’s gentler nutmeg. Alphas soothing their omega. The three of them smelled so good together. 

Lance’s body fell slack. Lotor never comforted him. If anything, he let his scent sting and prickle away at Lance’s skin. 

“What…?” he mumble before slipping back into sleep. Keith and Shiro kept a hold on him. They didn’t let go and instead pressed tighter, making sure Lance breathed in their combined scent. 

“I think… I think we can do this. We can be there for him.”

“How though? Shiro, can’t you smell him? How he smells with us? I’m getting dizzy.”

“Take a few deep breaths.”

“That’ll make it worst!”

“No... breathe and you’ll see that at the end, it’s a bit bitter. He’s afraid. Focus on that. Think about how that hurts. What it means to your alpha instincts.”

Keith listened and breathed. “How are you doing that so easily?”

“Keith, I’m not. He smells sweet and he feels soft and firm in my arms. But I don’t want to be Lotor. In fact, I have a feeling that Lance won’t like being in my arms when he wakes up. I force my alpha to think about that. That if I act brashly now, there won’t be a second opportunity. Not with how Lance is now.”

“All my alpha can think of is how Lotor took him from me. And how I can sink my teeth into his neck so it’ll never happen again. Did you hear what he was saying to what he thought was Lotor? I can’t convince it to think about tomorrow morning when that bastard’s still hurting Lance.”

“Just remember his face. How his eyes look when he’s scared. Think about how you’re the one making him hurt. That’ll convince your alpha.”

Keith listened. Imagined that it was him that made Lance weep in his sleep that way. That it was his name, not Lotor’s, that instilled fear. It choked the desire from the alpha in his chest. 

_ No. We won’t hurt our mate.  _

Already, the alpha in Keith’s chest thought of Lance as its own. It would have bothered Keith if had been anyone else. 

Keith sighed a bit of relief. He wouldn’t be hurting Lance. Not tonight. 

\---

Lance felt warm and for the moment safe. Like how he felt in his mother’s arms. It had been so long since he remembered that sensation. His consciousness drifted in and out. Eyes fluttered open.

He was met with something he could not have anticipated. Shiro’s restful face was in front of him. Eyebrows strangely relaxed. He looked so young. His entire posture at ease. A thick hand wrapping around Lance’s torso. Keith’s arm was there too, gripping from the back and resting onto Shiro’s bicep.

He couldn’t see Keith but he could feel him. That smaller alpha was pressed into Lance’s back. And the oddest part of it all was how Keith’s leg childishly wrapped around Lance.

It should have frightened Lance. He didn’t like being touched. Not anymore. In the past, he thrived off it. But after what Lotor and the Galra did, touch was only a punishment. But this was gentle. Reassuring. And if Lance didn’t know better, almost  _ loving.  _

But he needed to leave. This wasn’t his place and he didn’t want to be there when the alphas discovered how he sandwiched himself between the two. So he tried to squirm his way out of the embrace. 

Keith’s arm tightened and his leg pressed down. Lance wondered if this what he did to Shiro. But Lance was stubborn and tried to leave again. 

“It’s too early...” Keith’s breath was hot against his neck. Keith was still sleepy. Lance tried to leave before the alpha realized who he was holding. “Lance, just go back to sleep.”

He stiffened. Keith knew who he was holding and his embrace was just as tight as ever. 

“I… I should go…” he whispered. Just because Keith knew, Shiro didn’t have to. 

“Lance, we’ll get up in another thirty doboshes.” Shiro’s hand gripped the back of Lance’s head and pulled him in tighter. The omega’s face pressed into Shiro’s bulging muscles. Keith seemed to sense the small gap created and pushed against Lance more. “It’s early even for me,” Shiro added with a yawn. 

Lance was mortified. They both knew who was between them and somehow were unbothered. 

\---

When the ship woke up, they set course to a small planet with a population of humanoid aliens. It was a diplomatic mission. Planet Follov was on the edges of the Galran empire’s constant expansion. It would soon fall to Zarkon’s reign. 

It was a simple mission so they took Lance with them. He had only been in a spaceship since his capture. They wondered if being on a planet would help him. Hunk struggled to convince Lance. He was already shaken from waking up between two alphas. Allura and Hunk were on the verge of giving said alphas a scolding. But both of them were convinced what they did was right. 

Coran alluded that the planet had weather patterns similar to Earth. That sometimes, it would rain. And that was all the bribery Lance needed. They put him in armor fitting of the Blue Paladin. Allura tried to give him the bayard to match, but he refused. 

“I’ll fly in a pod or something…” he mumbled. 

He ended up flying in the Yellow Lion with Hunk. Shiro had tried to get Lance into the Black lion, but Lance shied away. 

On Follov, they were greeted by the king and queen. Allura and Coran did most of the talking. Lance stood outside with Hunk, a dazed look in his eyes. 

The king and queen of Follov were recently blessed with a child. She was small, her skin a soft pink and tufts of white fur around her small body. The infant’s aunt was walking her, hoping to stop the child’s cries that sounded more like the distant call of a loon bird. The aunt’s eyes locked onto Lance, who seemed to be dreamily watching them. 

She strode up.

“Would the Blue Paladin like to hold little Ara?” 

“Eh…?” Lance was taken aback. Both at being called the Blue Paladin and the offer of holding the small princess.

“I… I… shouldn’t…” he stammered. Keith and Shiro were in earshot.

“It would honor us all if a Paladin held her.” 

“I…”

The child was thrust into his arms. She was small and warm. Her bright blue eyes locked with Lance’s and the shock of being in another’s arms quieted her. 

Lance’s face did a dance of emotions. First there was fear. He didn’t know how to hold her. His arms long and lanky, but found ease supporting her tiny head. 

Fear faded to a smile. The first one on Lance’s mouth since they had found him.

Shiro and Keith both stilled. 

There it was. The smile they longed for. They moved towards him, drawn to that warmth, wanting to see how Lance’s eyes looked up close with that smile on his lips. 

The omega traced the princess’s hand with a long, tan finger. The princess gripped it tightly. She was fiercely alive.

And that smile vanished. Lance’s mouth quivered. His brows arched in sorrow. Large tears spilled down his face. 

Ever since they rescued Lance, he never shed a single tear. And now they were spilling down his face, dripping onto the princess’s blankets. Sobs wracked his chest as they left his mouth. 

“Lance… Buddy…” Hunk wanted to soothe. 

“I never got to hold him…” 

Shiro and Keith were beside him before Lance could weep another tear. It was an action that should have startled Lance, but he was too lost in the memory.

“He was so small. Small enough that they didn’t have to cut me open.”

Male omegas were rare. A recessive gene where their bodies could have children, but needed c-sections to give birth to them after nine months. 

Shiro’s hands cupped Lance’s back. Keith stood closer.

“Lotor never let me say goodbye. He just took him away… He took Taka....” Lance’s words were broken by a sob. “Hunk… Hunk I can’t. Can you take her?” He didn’t want to frighten or hurt the little one, who was innocently swatting at Lance’s face. Hunk scooped her up. She was comically small in his arms. With a worried expression, he took the princess back to her aunt.

Lance’s sobs became more violent. Keith pulled him into an embrace. Shiro standing from the back, rubbing circles into Lance’s shoulder blades, alarmed at how his hand dwarfed the omega’s frame. 

“I wanted to say goodbye…” 

“I’m sorry, Lance…” Shiro didn’t know what to offer. 

“He was mine… And I knew when he was there. His kicks were small but I knew he was going to be strong. My Taka…” Another tremor of of cries left his body. Each time he tried to say the name, it hit him. 

“Lance…” Keith wanted to fix this. Wanted that smile to be back on Lance’s face. 

“It’s stupid… I’m sorry.”

Shiro pressed his head into the side of Lance’s. “No… no it’s not. Please, tell us. We want to help.”

“It’s just… I knew he was Lotor’s child. But from the moment I knew he was there, I wasn’t alone. I knew his father was evil…” Shiro and Keith stiffened at the word father. A title Lotor didn’t deserve. Especially not when coupled with Lance. “But I thought he could be good. I loved him already. How could he be evil too?”

Keith pushed his head to the other side of Lance’s. The two alphas now encasing Lance in an embrace. 

“I… I never told anyone but…” Lance swallowed the words. He gave up finishing the thought.

“But what? Please, Lance?” Keith wanted to know so that he could take the pain away. 

“I named him.” Lance weeped. “I named him after something good. I wanted him to be good too. Not like Lotor but like the person he was named after. I would sing him songs. Lotor was so angry when he heard it. Heard the name as I sang it. He took me to his room. He wouldn’t stop… There was so much blood. And I lost him. I lost Takashi…” 

Shiro nearly stopped breathing. 

_ He named his child after me… I was safe when he wasn’t and when he should have hated me, he gave his child my name. _

“Lance…” Shiro’s voice was laced with longing. The thought of Lance with a child, their child, echoed in the back of his mind while he tried to soothe. But instead of soothing, it snapped Lance back to the present, aware that he was in the arms of the alpha lovers. 

“I… I…” his face red with embarrassment at admitting the name of his child. He pushed them away. “I shouldn’t have said that… Forget it! Forget what I said!” 

“Lance, it’s alright… I’m…” 

Shiro wanted to say he was honored. That he wished the no harm came to the child. That he would have loved it like his own because it was Lance’s. 

Hunk came back and Lance bolted to him. 

“Hey Buddy, what’s wrong?” Hunk was too kind to glare, but he sent the alphas a quizzical look.

“Hunk… I’m just tired. I’m sorry.” And with that, he hid behind the beta’s hunkering form. They left the two alphas behind. 

\---

“He… he named his child after me…” Shiro whispered to Keith. “How did he think I was worthy of that after I left him there? After I let them do all those things to him. Why… why did he do that?”

“Shiro… you’re always been Lance’s hero. As much as I hate to say it, he’s admired you more than anyone.” There was a bit of envy in his voice. Keith couldn’t inspire admiration in Lance. 

“I don’t deserve it… I…”

“Shiro, I think he’s more than mortified you know. Did you see his face?” It was strange having Keith console him now. “You’re gushing out pheromones right now. Like you’re under attack. I can barely stand it. You’re going to scare him more and make him think you hate what he did.” A pause. “Do you… are you upset that he...?”

“No…” Shiro almost sobbed. “Is it wrong that it made me happy? Like it was me taking the child away from Lotor? Like it was mine and not his? That’s wrong isn’t it…?”

“If it is, then I’m in the same boat.” 

\---

That sleep cycle, Keith sought Lance. Finding him was difficult. Lance wasn’t in his room. Nor was he in the bridge or kitchen. Keith kept roaming until he caught a faint smell of lilacs and sea salt. His alpha didn’t need coaxing to follow. It instinctively took Keith there, to the hanger. And there Lance was, standing in front of Blue. 

“Lance?” And the Cuban jumped, startled and bearing his neck. Keith stood frozen. Seeing Lance react that way made Keith want to jump into Red and take on Lotor and Zarkon. And to be honest, he was tempted by the skin. Maybe he should have let Shiro do this. Keith wasn’t good with words and he was too impulsive. But Shiro was a mess at the moment. 

Keith watched as Lance’s face contorted in irritation. Not at the alpha, but at himself. He quickly lifted the hood of his jacket over his head, hiding his neck. 

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.”

“S’fine…” Lance mumbled. 

“What are you doing here?” Keith approached slowly this time, not to startle Lance again. He tried not to hover, but found himself standing closer than anticipated. 

“I… I missed her. But she won’t talk to me…” Lance looked resigned. Like he knew this would happen. “Lotor was right…” There it was. That man’s name on Lance’s mouth. 

“Lance, stop saying his name!” Keith growled it. His alpha rumbling within him. It did something to Lance. The omega’s legs trembled for a moment. And then they stopped holding Lance’s weight. His knees buckled and down he went. “I… I…” Keith’s voice was laced with an alpha’s intent and his pheromones verged on dominating. 

Lance’s face turned bitter fast. 

“Lance, I’m sorry! I just… I get angry when I remember what he did to you…” 

“Whatever. It’s fine. Will you let me stand up again?” It didn’t sound fine.

“What…?"

“I can’t stand when you’re still doing that.” Keith gave a blank expression. “You’re spreading your pheromones. I’m not on suppressants.” Keith was embarrassed at what Lance was saying without quiet getting it. “Uh… they’re making me submit?” Lance was getting worried. “No seriously… if you keep this up, it’ll trigger a heat. Stop it, Keith.” Keith was red now. He watched panic overtake Lance’s eyes.

“I… I’m not even aware how I’m doing it? How do I… how do I stop?” The thought of a heat made his head spin and his pheromones pulse. 

“By not doing that!” Lance shuddered as the wave hit him. He felt just the slightest bit of slick build inside him. 

“Sorry! I just… I don’t know what I’m doing! Lance… I need help!” Keith looked pained like a kicked animal. For him to ask for help was monumental. Lance couldn’t be angry. Not when Keith looked at him that way. 

“It’s alright… Uh… here, bend down.” Keith sank to his knees in front of Lance. “I’ve never done this before. So I’m not sure if it’ll actually work. I’m sorry: you’re going to smell like me. You can wash it off once you calm down.” Lance extended his arm towards Keith. “Is this ok?” he added. Lance didn’t want to be like Lotor. 

“Anything. Just make me stop.” Keith never felt like a slave to his secondary traits until now. Is that how Lance felt? His body acting on its own? And god… He did that to Lance. Keith made him fold like paper to the alpha inside his chest.

Lance rubbed his wrist against Keith’s neck, enveloping the alpha in lilacs. The scent was so much more prominent than ever. Lance must have been suppressing himself. This scent was too sweet. Keith growled. 

“Shhh, it’s alright. I know I don’t smell good. Don’t think about it. I’m just covering your glands with my scent. It should stop your pheromones temporarily.” Lance's voice was so soft. So caring that it made Keith ache. He wanted this always. 

“Lance… you don’t… you smell amazing.” It hurt to hear Lance degrade himself. 

“That’s nice but  _ he _ said I wreaked like the cheap perfume a whore wears.” A laugh left Lance’s throat, but it wasn’t sincere. Just a broken imitation of the sound. 

Lance had no filter when it came to Lotor. But Keith remembered that Lance was constantly put on show for not just the Galra but for galaxies. His feed spread far and wide to anyone who knew its frequency. 

As much as he wanted to be angry at what they did to Lance, the omega’s scent soothed it all away. His own pheromones slowing down. 

“No… no you smell like Earth. It’s not… It’s nice.” Keith’s breaths slowed down. 

“Thanks, Mullet-head.” Keith’s heart soared at the pet name. It use to send him into a rage but now Lance was too tired to make it viscous. It was almost loving. “See? All good. Can I have my hand back now?” 

Keith didn’t realize when, but he had gripped Lance’s wrist and brought it close to his face, burying his nose into it. He wanted to drag his tongue across the gland but quickly released it instead. Lance couldn’t possibly like being touched after all he endured and especially not after Keith forced him to submit. Even if it was by accident.

“Sorry! Sorry…” Keith stood up. His skin felt incredibly soft from Lance’s pheromones. Every motion filling his lungs with lilacs. He didn’t want to wash it off. 

“It’s alright… So why were you looking for me, anyway?” Lance shakily stood up. His legs faltered and he swayed but Keith was there to grab his shoulder. 

“It’s… It’s time for sleep…” Keith completely forgot the script he recited in his head to convince Lance to rest with them again. 

“Oh… ok? Thanks for reminding me?” He raised a brow.

“No, I mean… With us.” 

“I can’t… I shouldn’t. I think I remember waking up last night. I don’t remember what I said but I know it wasn’t pretty. You guys can’t sleep like that.”

“Lance… I don’t offer things like this unless I want to. You know that.”

“Maybe I don’t want to? Maybe I don’t want anyone to hear what comes out of my mouth when I sleep? Do you know how much I hate it? What he’s made me?” Lance was careful not to say Lotor’s name again. 

“Please, Lance…” Keith didn’t know how to respond to that. So he settled on begging. “You looked more rested today that you’ve had since…”  _ Since we rescued you from Galra hell. _

“I… I’m afraid to.” That made Keith’s grip tighten.

“Of… of us? Do you think we would…?” Did Lance think Shiro and him were like Lotor?

“Oh quiznak, no! No. I know you wouldn’t. I just… I don’t know what to say to Shiro. I messed up. He must be so angry that I would name Lotor’s child after him. I didn’t think I’d ever see him again for him to know…” That wrecked Keith. Did Lance think they wouldn’t look for him? Or was it that Lance thought he would die before that ever happened? 

“He’s not angry.”

“You’re just saying that…”

“No! Lance, he should be the one telling you this. He was happy.” Lance didn’t believe him. “I promise. He forgets how much you look up to him. So just come with me, alright? Please?” Keith was quickly learning that pleading gave Lance control. He could easily swallow his pride and keep asking if it meant Lance would just give them a chance. 

“I shouldn’t.”

“Please.”

Lance didn’t say anything. Just nodded his head. 

\---

Shiro stood up the moment his door opened. He had been brooding on the edge of his bed, trying to think of a way to approach Lance. 

Keith entered but smelling different. Smelling so good. 

Shiro strode up to him and wrapped his arms around the alpha, digging his face into Keith’s neck where it was strongest.

“What is that smell?”

He heard the shuffling of feet, but Keith hadn’t moved. He peeked past the alpha to see Lance. A Lance that was second guessing being there at the sight of the embrace. He felt like an intruder.

“Um… I’m sorry. He must smell like me.” Lance stepped backwards. He was going to leave because Shiro was foolishly taken by the scent. Of course it was the smell of Lance. But this was different. This was a willing smell. And so potent. 

“He helped me stop mine…” Keith was still inexperienced as an alpha. Of course his pheromones would run wild. Shiro was just amazed Lance knew what to do and how to do it. Too much would have put Keith into a rut and too little wouldn’t have done anything at all.

Lance smelled wonderful, but it was always with an undercurrent of distress. Clearly the omega strained himself to hide his scent. Why hadn’t Shiro noticed sooner? That much restraint without suppressants must make Lance’s body ache.. 

“It smells bad, I know… I’ll just go…” Shiro could read it on Lance’s face. He assumed that Shiro hated it. Hated that it was on Keith. But far from it. Shiro wanted the scent of lilacs on himself. In his skin.

Shiro let go of Keith and approached Lance. 

“Lance, stay…” He said it with such earnestness that it stunned Lance. “Please stay.” They were both learning. When asked, Lance was willing. 

\---

Shiro gave Lance a shirt and Keith offered sweats. The pants were slightly too short and Lance swam in the shirt. But he wore the articles of clothing anyway. Keith and Shiro laid down first. They remembered how much the shifting weight of a mattress and the sound of bed sheets upset Lance. 

“You’re going to sleep with…. With that still on you?” Lance pointed to his neck.

“Why not?” Keith stretched into the bed.

“But… but that’s not… it’s my…”  _ But that’s not Shiro’s. It’s my scent. _

“Stop worrying and get in.” 

Lance eyed the bed. The alphas had taken up a lot of space on the soft surface. The only spot left was right in between. 

“But… I’d be in the middle?”

“And…?” Keith countered. 

Lance was too tired to argue. He tried making sense out of Keith and Shiro. Why would a pair be willing to share their space? And a space that was meant for intimacy and closeness. Where omegas were only meant to be bred and not welcomed. But the alphas were persistent and Lance was always weak to them. Even before Lotor’s reign of terror. 

So he crawled in the space they gave him. Between their bodies. 

Strangely, he fell asleep quick. 

\---

“I made him submit… I didn’t mean to. But he kept talking about Lotor and I snapped. I wanted him to be mine and so did my alpha. Shiro, you should have seen his face. He couldn’t believe that  _ I  _ would do that to him. He was so betrayed…”

“I don’t know many omegas that could do what he did. He’s an amazing omega.” Shiro was in awe. “His instincts are perfect…”

“The three of us would be perfect.” Keith didn’t like to daydream of what ifs and his wants. But he couldn’t help himself. Lance was in their bed and his scent was on Keith’s neck. It made the alpha in his chest bold. It whispered and pawed for Lance. 

_ This is the perfect omega for us. Give him to me. Give me this omega.  _

“I’m afraid he doesn’t think so… Not yet. Your back was turned so you didn’t see him when I held you. Like he thought I was going to snap at him just because he helped you with his scent… And crow, they way it smelled. Willing, not afraid.”

Keith and Shiro were whispering to another another with Lance between them. Every now and then they would sneak Lance a reassuring touch.

“He told me I could set him into a heat if I didn’t stop… He stopped me.”

“Oh…?” Shiro remembered when Lotor hailed them a communication. Forty quintents until Lance’s heat. Lance had been with them for thirty-three. “The reason you can trigger one is because he’s getting close to it in his cycle.” 

Shiro couldn’t resist. He put his arm around Lance. Not because of the idea of a heat. But because he knew how much it was going to hurt Lance. Heats didn’t become easier after bearing a child. If anything, they became worst. 

“He’s going to be in pain… isn’t he…” 

“So much… Especially if it’s his first one after…”  _ After losing the child he named after me _ . 

“Can we do anything?”

“Only if he lets us…”

\---

“Don’t… Please don’t…” Lance’s shoulders contorted in opposite directions. He fisted the sheets and tried to pull them off. 

“Shhh… Lance, it’s ok.” Shiro and Keith were there, whispering. 

“Let me hold him. Let me hold Takashi.” Shiro’s heart sank. He was not the Takashi that Lance wanted. 

“It’s ok, we’ve got you. Lance, you’re safe.” Keith touched Lance’s face. He was covered in a cold sweat. 

“Please! Haggar, please! He’s mine! I love him. I love Takashi! He’s all I have.” Shiro’s heart leaped. He knew that wasn’t for him but how it made his body buzz. 

They wrapped around the sleeping boy. Using their scent to soothe just as they had the night before. 

Lance’s eyes opened. 

“I couldn’t protect Takashi…”

“Lance, you did your best.” Shiro cupped Lance’s face in his human hand. “You couldn’t have done more.”

“I’m not sorry… I’m not sorry I gave him your name. But I am sorry you found out.” Lance wasn’t quite awake. He thought it was a dream.

“Lance, you named your child after me. How could I not be happy? Your son was precious. And you gave something precious my name. I’m sorry that they took Takashi away from you. Keith and I would have loved him.” 

“Because he was yours, Lance,” Keith added. 

Lance hiccuped back tears. 

“I miss him… He kicked so strongly. He wanted to live…”

Keith was impulsive and kissed Lance’s cheek. The omega didn’t hide from the touch. So Shiro wanted to do the same. To physically strip Lance of his sorrow. Both alphas kissed away Lance’s tears. Pressing their lips on his thick lashes, his cheeks, and his nose. Not his mouth. That wasn’t theirs to have. 

“I… I don’t think I’ve had a nice dream in so long. Thank you…” Lance sighed and fell asleep again. 

“A nice dream…” Shiro almost laughed. “He thinks we’re a nice dream.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, if this is way too gross of a story where you think sexual assault is being romanticized, I'll delete it. I wanted to show that a support system is the most vital for any person, but especially for someone who has undergone such a traumatic experience. 
> 
> I also wanted to highlight how violence can hurt not just the victim but everyone around them. Not that the victim should feel guilt for that. No. It's the person who has caused the hurt in the first place that should feel the brunt of that guilt. 
> 
> Lance will heal. I promise that. But the next chapter hasn't been written yet. I'll only write it if you guys think I should. 
> 
> Thank you for reading.


	3. The Fever

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for your reassuring words. This story is one I have hesitated on sharing because I'm very concerned that it's romanticizing sexual assault. Thank you for sharing stories and being open with me. If at any point you feel this story diverge from my initial intentions (recovering, the aftermath of violence, love, care, and personal growth), please hold me accountable. I will delete it and hope I can make amends. 
> 
> Thank you for reading this. Thank you for your kindness.

When they woke up, Lance wasn’t in the bed. It startled them and they scuttled about, shoving clothes on their bodies hastily. They didn’t want to hunt Lance down, but they wanted to be close to him.

Already Shiro and Keith’s relationship was softening. They were talking again instead of growling and shoving. They wanted to do that to Lance. To soften him too from everything he’s had to endure.

They were about to leave the room when the door to their bathroom opened. Out stepped Lance with wet hair, wearing a set of clothes belonging to Keith. They were similar in size.

He looked well rested. His skin glistening and his back tall. He stretched and for a moment, his shirt–Keith’s shirt– rose up giving a peek at Lance’s bronze abdomen. A faint scar trailing across his hipbone and into his navel. A wound that neither Keith or Shiro remembered Lance sustaining.

“Sorry… I used your shower.” Lance woke up covered in Keith and Shiro’s scent. As good as the smell was, he didn’t want to be covered in it. In something that wasn’t his.

The alphas on the other hand were drenched in Lance’s perfume. Something Lance noticed as he stepped into the room.

“That’s alright, Lance.” Shiro mumbled, his eyes still on Lance’s stomach.

“And I borrowed your clothes, Keith. I hope you don’t mind. I’ll wash them and…”

“Don’t… don’t worry about it.” They had a glimpse of Lance in their clothes last night. Keith still couldn’t get use to it. There was something so domestic about Lance in clothes that belonged to them.

The alphas didn’t say anything else or move. It made Lance feel small. He fidgeted.

“Um… about last night. I’m… I’m sorry I scented Keith. I, uh… I didn’t want to go in heat so I was a bit selfish.”

How Lance thought that was selfish was beyond them. A heat triggered early by an alpha would be abrupt and painful. Not to mention put said alph into a rut.

“I didn’t mind. You helped me.” The scent was still on his neck and Keith found himself wanting to boast to Shiro about it.

“I shouldn’t have… and now you both smell like me.” It seemed the apology was aimed more towards Shiro. “I don’t smell good. _He_ use to smother me with his scent because mine bothered him so much.”

Shiro and Keith knew who _he_ was. They also knew an alpha wouldn’t scent unless he found the smell of their omega pleasing. Lotor must have been enthralled by Lance’s scent to act that way. Just like they were…

“Anyway… thanks for helping me sleep. I gotta go talk to Coran so…”

“Lance you smell good,” Shiro blurted out. Keith shot him a look. The words seemed so embarrassingly childish as they left their leader’s mouth.

“Oh… uh… Thanks. Um… Team Voltron’s most handsome sharpshooter always, uh, smells good?” Lance tried. Tried desperately to be the person he use to be. The words weren’t convincing and left his mouth awkwardly. But he was trying.

And that meant the world to the both of them. Lance seemed different. Stronger.

The words the alpha’s thought Lance forgot in his dream like state were ringing in the back of his mind. Shiro told him he did his best to protect his unborn son. And they both told him his son was precious. That they would have loved him. Words he needed to hear spoken to him to believe.

\---

Lance spent the next few nights with the alphas. Every sleep cycle, they would seek him out. It took less and less convincing. Until finally the exchange was a silent one.

\---

Lance sat next to Hunk, watching his friend finish cooking. It was soothing to watch. He would give the towering beta words of encouragement.

“Hunk, Buddy, that smells just as amazing as my mother’s empanadas.” A complement of the highest order. “I’m happy I get to eat your food again. It makes me feel like I’m home.”

Lance watched Hunk beam proudly at him.

Hunk always knew Lance was important to him. But once they lost him, Hunk realized how crucial Lance was. The boy made them all smile. Made them all feel good about themselves. The reaffirmation gave them all a sense of belonging. Everyone had a place to call home.

And yet… who did that for Lance?

Hunk wanted to give a flattering compliment. But he struggled. He didn’t want it to be empty. Lance’s were always so genuine. What could he say in that moment that wouldn’t draw out Lance’s insecurities? Compliment him on his sharpshooting? Lance avoided anything remotely related to Voltron or being a Paladin. Should he say how handsome Lance was? But then again, Lance seemed to hide as much of his body as possible now. He didn’t want eyes on him. The omega had enough of that back with the Galra.

As Hunk struggled, Keith and Shiro stepped into the room. They were quiet but approached carefully.

Lance fidgeted with the hem of his jacket and Hunk knew why they were here. The alphas came to collect Lance to their bed. It wasn’t a secret. Not since Lance stepped out of Shiro’s room in Keith’s clothes. And why should it be a secret? They were helping Lance sleep and ever since, they all could see moments of their older Lance shine through.

And yet… it was still odd. The way they surrounded Lance. How they adjusted their bodies to ensure both closeness but never touch, like they wanted to swallow him.

“Lance…” Keith’s voice was softer than Hunk was use to. And the way the alpha said the name: it was almost pleading.

Keith and Shiro were ready. Every night had taken convincing. But Lance looked at them and hopped out of his chair.

“Hey, Hunk? Have a goodnight, Buddy. Thanks for letting me bother you while you baked. I can’t wait to try your new pastry.”

“You’re never a bother. I love spending time with you, Buddy. No one enjoys my baking as much as you.” And then they saw it creep onto Lance’s mouth. A warm smile that melted all the exhaustion from his tan face. And Hunk knew that he said the right words.

For a moment, he gave Lance a place. A home.

The beta looked into the faces of the alphas, about to give them a goodnight as well when he saw it. The utter adoration in their eyes. Mouths parted slightly in awe. Faces stained with want.

_Oh… oh that can’t be good._

Not that Hunk found anything wrong with a polyamorous bond. His worry came from knowing how much Keith and Shiro loved one another. Could they do the same for Lance? The omega deserved love, so why not from two? But to put him between two alphas already established as a pair seemed a bit cruel.

But Lance followed the two out of the room, leaving Hunk behind, heavy with worry.

\---

“I… I’m really thankful for what you’ve guys have done. Um… It can’t be easy sleeping when someone kicks and screams every night.” Lance hid most his face in the covers. Before they could tell Lance that it was fine or how they were actually sleeping for once, the omega continued. “I’m a lot better now… so I think tonight should be the last time I…”

“What?” Keith snapped. Whenever they were in the bed, Shiro and Keith were careful not to move. But Lance’s statement made him spring up and turn to Lance, almost leaning over him. The mattress shifted and he saw Lance’s frame stiffen.

“I… I can’t sleep here forever.”

“Lance, you’re welcome to stay here as long as you’d like,” Shiro was calmer but glaring at Keith.

“No… no this has to be the last night.”

“Why? Did we do something wrong?” Keith softened, feeling guilt at alarming Lance.

“No! No… I… It’s… I’m…” Lance sat up. It didn’t feel right to say the words when he was in a space where lovers curled into one another. “I have a… a heat.”

Keith held his breath. He had gotten too comfortable with their arrangement. Waking up in the morning, just before Lance, and finding him covered in their scent, holding Lance close while they fended off his nightmares, kissing his tears away, feeling his warmth… All those things made him forget. Lance was an omega.

Shiro was more aware. He was adept at noticing an omega’s cycle. Lance body temperature was dropping. It would do that before it spiked hot for the heat. And there was a shift in his scent. The sea salt was stronger than before. Shiro’s alpha was older and keen. It whispered longingly that Lance’s heat was less than two days away.

“Use this room then… Keith and I will go somewhere else.” Shiro didn’t like the idea of Lance alone. A rut was just as painful as a heat, but shorter and easier to manage. But if he was being honest, he just wanted Lance surrounded by their scent while he went through a heat.

“I already talked to Coran. I’m going to the empty room near the medical bay.”

“That room isn’t fit for a heat and you know it.” Keith narrowed his eyes.

“It can seal off its air supply from the rest of the ship and use an independent filter. It’s perfect.”

Shiro was impressed. Not because he thought Lance wasn’t smart. But because not even he had thought of that. Lance had thought this through.

“But it’s empty…” Keith wanted to argue this. He wanted Lance close and that room was floors apart from him and Shiro.

“I’ll take a sleeping bag. Coran says Altean ones are very comfortable…” Lance sank back into the bed. “And I’m use to the floor…” The memory of a soft bed dipping below him with Lotor hovering above came rushing back. His first heat with the prince was unforgiving.

“You should use our room,” Keith insisted.

“Our scents should make it easier for you.” Shiro watched as Lance’s face turned red with embarrassment. Lance was used to being in compromising situations. From the broken shouts of his nightmares, they gathered that Lotor liked to put Lance on display. The Galra had no shame. When it was time for Lance’s heat, everyone on Lotor’s ship would know. The prince flaunted it and even took Lance in front of his generals.

So seeing embarrassment made Shiro’s heart flutter.

_Do you like our scents? Do you like us?_

“I’ll be ok. I’ve got a lot of water and and dry food in the room already.” Lance buried his face in his pillow, muffling his words. Shiro was a bit envious, because now Lance was facing Keith. “Besides, where would you sleep?”

“In Keith’s old room. Or yours. It really doesn’t matter. Your comfort it more important.” Shiro wanted to touch Lance’s shoulder.

“Thanks… but I’m going to use that room.” Lance’s voice was suddenly firm. Up until now, his language was more passive. Keith and Shiro got the message. There was a finality and strength in his words. 

_This is my heat. I’ll handle it._

\---

They didn’t see Lance for the next two days. Sleeping without Lance left the two of them cold. How had they done it before?

Already the alphas were tense again. Keith snapped easily at Shiro while the older alpha brooded and fumed. Perhaps the beasts in their chests knew that their omega was going into heat. Their inner alphas had decided for the both of them: Lance was theirs. Oddly enough, their alphas didn’t mind sharing.

But the two wanted Lance to come to that conclusion on his own. They wanted, _needed_ , Lance to chose them.

Neither Keith nor Shiro ever got too intimate with one another. Keith’s alpha was too young and proud. It would never submit. At times, Shiro would let the younger mount him. But even then, they were never satisfied. Shiro’s body wasn’t made to be taken the way Keith wanted to. It was a knotless endeavor that left them both sore.

And since Lance’s disappearance, they only tried once. It turned violent for the both of them. They stopped trying.

The thought of a heat was dizzying to them both. But more than that: the thought of hurting Lance frightened them. They kept their distance. 

\---

Lance’s heat started. Shiro’s alpha had somehow attuned itself to the omega’s cycle. He didn’t need to smell or see Lance to know. Keith was much younger and couldn’t distinguish what his alpha was telling him. Anxiety bloomed in his chest and he felt restless.

\---

They were all eating breakfast. Everyone sitting at the table but Lance, who had locked himself away. It was the first day of his heat.

“Hey Pidge, can you take this to Lance?” Hunk held up a package.

“Sure! What is it?” She took the parcel carefully.

“I figured Lance should have something that actually tastes nice for while he’s… you know. He’s only got dry rations so I made him a treat.” Hunk was caring but easily embarrassed about the subject of a heat. “Since you’re going to be the one checking up on him, I thought you should take it to him.”

“Wait… What?” Keith dropped his spoon.

“Lance needs other nutrition, it makes sense,” Pidge tried to explain.

“No… no I mean… _you’re_ doing what now?” He tried to hide the envy in his voice.

A primal part of Keith wanted to stomp into the room Lance was in and sink his teeth into the omega’s neck. But the other part of him, the part he listened to, just wanted to be near Lance. Not fucking. Not touching. Just reassuring.

He was young, that he knew. But he also knew his could help without needing to touch Lance. Why did Pidge get to help when he couldn’t?

“I offered to help Lance and he said yes.”

“But you… you can’t…?” Keith didn’t understand. Pidge was a beta and couldn’t help. Not like an alpha could.

“Oh no! No! Not like that!” Pidge’s face turned red. “I’ll just be checking to see if he's ok. Making sure he’s drinking water. Stuff like that.” She was angry Keith thought otherwise.

“Can you check his temperature too, while you’re at it?” Shiro added. “He’ll be running a fever by now. Everything will feel cold in comparison to him. He’ll try to warm himself up, but that’s the last thing he should do. It’ll make him sick.”

Keith was always amazed at how Shiro conducted himself. It was one of the reasons he was drawn to the man in the first place. Calm and calculating, but with the best of intentions. He felt childish in comparison, feeling envy towards Pidge. 

\---

“Lance? Can I come in?” Pidge was nervous. Shiro told her that Lance’s heat had begun. She never saw one up close and didn’t know what to expect.

“Come in.” Lance’s voice was hoarse.

The doors parted and she stepped in. Even for being a beta, she could clearly smell Lance. It wasn’t overbearing. Not like she imagined a heat to smell. Instead it smelled safe. Like an alcove of flowers tucked away on the edges of a salty beach. Like earth… Like home.

She saw him in the furthest corner of the room, surrounded by containers of water and dry food. He was huddled in a few blankets, shivering, complexion pale, and eyes lidded.

It was a nest. A lonely one. An empty one.

“Lance, is it ok if I come in?”

Lance whimpered a sound that seemed like a “Yes.” She stepped inside and slowly approached him. Shiro told her to be careful. Not to make him feel cornered, but Lance had already put himself in one.

She saw Lance fidget and try to hide himself deeper into the covers. His face was red. Not from the heat but the shame.

“Hunk made you something to eat.”

“H...Hunk is… is the b… best…” Talking was difficult for him. Pidge didn’t know, but slick was seeping out of him. Lance could feel every gush, every trickle. He hadn’t brought enough blankets. Already the sheets he sat on were sopping wet. He hated the sensation against his sore skin.

“Are you drinking water?” Pidge sat down the package and kneeled in front of Lance.

“Y… yeah…” He shuddered and held back a groan as the walls inside him twitched, aching for any kind of touch. Even in the haze of his heat, Lance didn’t want to make Pidge uncomfortable. To her, his reaction was just a grimace.

“Can I check your temperature?”

Lance meekly nodded. She fidgeted with the gadget she brought with her and pressed it against Lance’s temple. A few beeps and it flashed: 105.

“Lance… Lance you have a fever!” Shiro mentioned that Lance’s body might reach just above a hundred, but no more. This exceeded that and even bordered on life threatening.

“But it’s so cold…” Lance wheezed. He tried to sink deeper into the sheets.

“Lance, we need to cool you down!” She tugged on the sheets and Lance was too weak to resist. They slipped between his fingers and what she saw, she hadn’t anticipated.

Lance’s sat in his boxers and nothing else. It wasn’t his nakedness that bothered Pidge. It was the scars. They were thin pale lines that ran across his body. Across his chest, dipping into his abdomen, trailing up his arms. Wounds made by a knife very intentionally. They weren’t hideous. But they were remnants of the suffering he had with the Galra.

Because they left him behind.

Lance shuddered and cried as he felt a spasm run through him. His body was angry at its emptiness. And now he was even colder.

“Lance, I need to get you to a bath, now! You’re too hot!”

“It’s cold.” His words were slurring.

“Lance, do you trust me?”

“Of course…” Strangely, Pidge was taken aback by that answer. She thought that Lance wouldn’t trust her. Trust any of them after leaving him behind.

“I’m gonna take you to the bath in the med bay, ok? But we’re gonna have to move. Can you walk?” She was worried. He was growing more disoriented.

Lance tried to stand up, but his legs gave out and he slumped. If Pidge hadn’t caught him, his face would have slammed into the floor. His skin felt like fire.

“Lance… I can’t carry you!” But it was too late. Lance was unconscious.

\---

She ran into the bridge, terrified.

“Hunk! Where’s Hunk?!”

“He’s out on a mission with Allura. We received message from the Balmerans and they left with the Yellow Lion. Why, Pidge?” Coran stepped down from the control panel.

“It’s Lance!” she was shaking.

Shiro and Keith were immediately beside her.

“What’s wrong?” Keith could smell Lance on her. Sweet and floral, but wounded. The alpha in his chest rose with panic.

_Our omega is hurt._

“His fever! It’s too high! And he passed out! I can’t carry him to the med bay.”

“It’s alright, Pidge. I’ll carry him.” Shiro put his hand on her shoulder. She didn’t realize how much her small frame trembled with fear until his hand steadied her.

She had lost Lance once already. She couldn’t bear to see it happen again.

\---

The three of them walked to the door.

“Is this… is this a good idea…? Not to label you guys but… you’re alphas?”

“It’s alright, Pidge. We won’t hurt him.” Shiro put his hand to the panel.

“You promise? He doesn’t look like he can defend himself.”

They could have been offended, but they both understood. Lance was already ravaged by one alpha. He couldn’t endure two attacking him now.

The door opened and they were hit by the smell. It was so much more potent. Shiro had underestimated the scent from how it clung to Pidge’s body. Keith immediately shuddered and covered his mouth.

“Crow… this isn’t good.” Shiro’s eyes dilated. He could feel both his own alpha and Keith’s cry out for Lance. He was alarmed with desire. Both of them were.

“Shiro… Shiro this was a mistake…” Keith’s voice was muffled through his hands. “I can’t think!”

“Remember! Focus on the part of his scent that’s bitter! The part that shows he’s hurt and afraid. Patience yields focus.”

Keith honed in on that part of Lance's scent. He remembered that a hurt and frightened Lance was the last thing he wanted under him. Any thought of desire vanished at the memory of Lance's eyes wide with fear. 

“What’s happening to him?” Pidge was smart, but alpha and omega dynamics didn’t quite make sense to her.

“He’s going through an alpha withdrawal. He… he’s shared his previous heats with…” he let that sentence die. They all knew who had taken Lance’s heats.

How did he not see this? Shiro deluded himself when it came to Lance and the Galra prince. Pretended it wasn’t real just to spare himself, when of course it was real. Lotor had hurt Lance then and his memory was still hurting him now.

“I’m… I’m going to pick him up. Keith, if I can’t control myself, I’m going to need you to step in. Restrain me. Hit me. Do anything.”

“What makes you think I’ll be any better?!”

“I trust you.”

And with that, Shiro went into the room. His heart thudding loud in his ears. He found Lance sprawled across the floor. His breath hitched when he saw the slick coating Lance’s legs and seeping through his briefs.

But Shiro couldn’t look at Lance like that. Not when the omega was wheezing and shivering. He swallowed back his desire and grabbed Lance. His human hand grazed Lance and felt how blistering hot he was.

“This is bad…” he muttered as the unconscious Lance shied from the touch of his prosthetic hand. It must have felt cold to his burning skin.

“Coran’s set up the cold bath,” Pidge tugged at Shiro’s arm. “This way!”

Shiro hoisted Lance onto his shoulder, carrying him out of the room. The open air helped him breathe but his body buzzing from where they touched.

Keith was there to help drop Lance into the tub. His hands cradling Lance’s head. For a moment, he mused at how soft the brown hair was even though it was so short. His hands tingling from the sensation of Lance’s skin.

“Please don’t…” Lance whined, delirious. “Lotor, please no…” In his unconscious state, he thrashed his long limbs. The water sloshing over the edge, frigid on the alpha’s legs.

“Lance, it’s us. It’s me and Shiro… He’s not here.” Keith let Lance go. As much as he wanted to reassure Lance with his touch, he also knew that in that moment, Lance wasn’t feeling their gestures as Keith and Shiro. He felt their hands as Lotor’s.  

Lance’s eyes opened. Blue gazing confused around him.

Pidge shoved the alphas aside and ran to him.

“P… Pidge?”

“You’re running a fever. We’re trying to lower it.”

“H… hey… Don’t… don’t cry…”

“I’m… I’m not!”

A weak hand lifted itself out of the water and brushed itself against Pidge’s cheek. His fingers still felt hot as they swiped the tears off her face. She was surprised to find that she was crying.

“I’m… nothing to cry over…” he sighed as he softly pinched her cheek, delirious from his fever.

Those words hurt. Because they all knew Lance believed them.

“That’s not true!” she huffed, her face red. “That’s not true at all…”

“S’cold…” he muttered, his head sinking into the tub. Pidge grabbed him. He flinched but settled into the touch, losing consciousness again.

\---

Blue eyes fluttered open. Lance was in the room he was before but it was drastically different from what he remembered. He was on a mattress, surrounded by sheets and blankets. The nape of his neck was wet and his underwear changed. In his clutches he found Keith’s red jacket. It smelled gently of nutmeg. He wasn’t sure how that got there, but he held it closer to his chest.

Most noticeable of all, there was a sleeping Pidge propped on the mattress next to him. Her head resting on her folded arms. It startled him at first, seeing a face close to his during a heat. But her soft breaths and messy hair put him at ease.

She looked so small.

He didn’t want to wake her but his throat was aching with thirst. From the wetness between his thighs, he knew he had lost a lot of water. Still clutching Keith’s jacket, he reached for the water. The mattress sank under him and he held his breath, hating the sensation even if it was just his own body on the surface.

“Lance…” Pidge murmured.

He quickly hid his lower body in the sheets, embarrassed by the slick. He didn’t want her to see him like that.

“Hey… thanks for watching over me. I… I think I was a handful?” Lance tried to laugh but he was too nervous.

“How… how are you feeling?” She put her glasses on.

“Much better. Thanks for watching out for me, bud.”

“Are you… thirsty?” She noticed Lance had moved towards the water

“Uh, yeah, but…”

“I’ll get it!” She bolted up and grabbed a water pack, handing it to him. He croaked out a thank you with his dry voice and gulped it up. Eyes closed as the cooling liquid distracted him for just a moment from the ache between his legs.

“Lance…?”

“Hm…?”

“I… I’m so sorry.”

He stopped drinking.

“What…?”

“We… we left you. We didn’t want to. We shouldn’t have. If I had found a way to keep the door open longer. If we didn’t take your bayard. If one of us moved before you took the hit…” Thick tears streaming down her face.

“Pidge…”

“This wouldn’t have happened. You wouldn’t have gotten hurt…”

“Pidge…” This time his voice was more firm. His hand pressed onto her shoulder. She was amazed at how sturdy it could be. Lance had seemed as brittle as a twig when unconscious but now he was firm and strong. “I don’t regret taking the blast. And I don’t blame you. Any of you. I made that choice. If you stayed, all of you would have been captured. There wouldn’t have been anyone to come save me. To save the universe.”

Yes, Lance had felt abandoned in the beginning. The Galra told him he was replaced. That there was a new paladin and he wasn’t needed. He was weak. And he believed them. He still did. But never did he blame his companions.

When he was held down by force or starved, his only salvation was that it was just him. That Shiro wasn’t forced into the arena as their Champion. Pidge wasn’t beaten. Keith wasn’t tortured. Hunk wasn’t starved. They could go on defending the universe without him. Perhaps it was because he believed the Galra wholeheartedly about being weak that he accepted his fate. Better him than the rest of them, right?

Sometimes it was hard to remember. There were moments he wanted to scream at them. Beg them to save him. Like when Lotor stripped him in front of his generals, when Haggar played games with his mind, or when they starved him to see when he would beg for food and water.

But he was never more desperate then when he lost his child. He only saw grief. Thick and consuming. Blinding.

But never regret.

“How… how can you say all that?”

He just offered her a smile.

“Because you saved me, Pidge. Keith and Shiro would have never been able to find me without you. I never thanked you for that. Those two hotheads would have gotten lost.” His voice was soft and he squeezed Keith’s jacket against his chest. “Thank you…”

“Please don’t thank me,” she weeped and weeped.

Lance’s flesh was sensitive and flushed, but he took the chance anyway. He held her close like he did his nieces and nephews. Hushed her and patted her head.

“Thank you for crying for me. It’s alright…”

“But it’s not…”

“It will be…”

\---

The door opened and a red eyed Pidge walked out of Lance’s room. She found the two alphas curled into one another, sleeping next to the door.

Shiro stirred at the brief scent of lilacs that fled the room. Keith followed suit.

“You two better not hurt him,” she hissed and stomped away.

\---

“He needs more sheets…” Keith murmured as he pulled the ones off their bed.

“You just want him to have our scent,” Shiro helped him regardless.

“Did you see how he held onto my jacket?” While dragging Lance out of the tub and into the room, the omega grabbed onto Keith’s jacket. He wouldn’t let go so Keith let Lance keep it. If Lance wasn’t in pain, he would have boasted about it.

 _He wanted_ my _jacket._ My _scent._

\---

They knocked but there was no answer. The door slid open and they found Lance sleeping. The bath they gave Lance diluted his scent. It made breathing and being in the space tolerable.

Keith wanted to see what became of his jacket and peaked only to find that Lance was wearing it, burrowing his nose into the sleeves.

“See…? He does need our scent,” Keith gestured to Lance, pride seeping through.

“Let’s just drop these off before he wakes up. I don’t think he wants to see two alphas right when he wakes up.”

They spilled the sheets onto Lance’s mattress and watched as Lance instinctively moved towards the fabric and curled into it. The display made Shiro pull off his own jacket and put it next to Lance.

Keith gave him a knowing look but Shiro kept his eyes on Lance who burrowed his face into it. Breathing deep and sighing.

“ _You just want him to have our scent_ …” Keith mocked as they left the room.

\---

Lance spent four days in that room. He hated his body. How it ached to be used. When he was alone, he shoved his fingers inside himself, not trying to draw out pleasure but just to end the hollowness. As much as he resisted, he found himself nuzzling the jackets of Keith and Shiro. He didn’t know how he acquired Keith’s, but somehow, he woke up to find Shiro’s as well. The scent made it easier to trick his body. To think it wasn’t alone.

When it finally ended, he hurt. His skin, his chest, his thighs… all of him.

He went to his room and took a shower, scrubbing off the slick and cum from his body, taking the remnants of his heat pheromones with them.

Everyone was on the bridge when he emerged, legs still shaking.

Heads snapped his direction. They looked at him with pity: like a wounded animal. Like an omega.

He hated it.

But he couldn’t hide from them. That would be fruitless.

And to his relief, they didn’t say anything about his heat. Didn’t ask if he was alright. Didn’t acknowledge what had become of his body. Instead, Hunk gave him a heaping plate of food.

“I saved the last one for you, Buddy. They’re almost like pigs in a blanket.”

“Thanks, Hunk.” He gave a shaky smile. Sincere, but nervous. He took a bite. “Hunk… Hunk you’re amazing.” Lance piled the food into his mouth, for the first time in so long, he was hungry. Tears welled at the edges of his eyes and his vision got blurry but he kept eating.

“Hey… Slow down. Don’t choke,” Shiro noted as Lance coughed on a bite.

“Sorry… I forget there’s more than one meal every other cycle…” Lance said between bites. He was unaware of what he admitted but they all froze. Of course. Of course they starved him.

“Lance… did they…? How much did you eat?” Allura was less tactful than usual. Her hands trembling with anger at what the Galra had done to their Blue Paladin. To their Lance.

“Hm…? Oh… it depended on what game they were playing.” He took several large gulps of water.

“Game…?”

Lance was too enthralled with his meal to be humiliated.

“Yeah… See how long I could go without food until I begged. Or passed out. Whichever happened first. I only cared about my meals when I had Takashi though…” His voice cracked. “Lotor was nicer then so it was easier to get food.” He shoved the thoughts of his deceased child away.

It was the most they had gotten out of him in one setting about his time there. And it was too much to imagine.

“Takashi…?”

“Here Lance, have my pigs in a blanket. I’m full.” Shiro cut Pidge off from questioning further.

Lance eyed the food. Not with suspicion but rather self doubt. _Is it ok to eat this much?_ Shiro insisted further by nodding. The alpha in his chest was pleased when the omega accepted.

Allura watched Lance and seethed. Not at him, but what had been done to him. Tortured. Assaulted. Starved.

How much had they done? How had Lance endured?

“Lance?”

The Cuban looked up at the princess.

“I’m going to end the Galra Empire. They will never touch you again. No one will. I promise.” She tried to hold back her rage but it manifested in a quiver in her voice.

Blue eyes softened as he looked at her. She was alarmed by the affection but saw the disbelief in them as well. His gaze silently said: _Thank you. But i_ _f Lotor wants me, he’ll take me. You can’t stop him._

And then they all knew. Knew that Lance thought he was on borrowed time.

He saw himself as still in the clutches of the Galra. No amount of distance protected him.

It hurt them all to acknowledge. But mostly, it hurt because they couldn’t disprove it. Because they weren’t sure they could protect Lance. Not when they had failed to in the first place.

\---

Keith and Shiro found Lance in the hallway. He seemed aimless and dazed. His arms holding a bundle close to his chest.

“Lance?” They tried to be gentle. Startling Lance so closely after a heat was the last thing they wanted. How vulnerable did he feel? How sore was his body? It couldn’t have been a pleasant heat.  

“Oh… H-hey.” Lance felt awkward.

“Lance are you…?”

Lance shoved the bundle he was holding into Shiro’s chest. The alphas looked down to see their jackets, folded and clean.

“I’m not sure how I got these. I hope I didn’t take them forcefully. I can get annoying when I’m _like that_. But… uh… They were really comforting. T-thank you. ” Lance tugged at his hair: a nervous tick he developed.

“We gave them to you because we wanted you to have them.” Keith wanted to grab Lance’s hand. To make it stop pulling at his hair. But it wouldn’t be comforting to Lance and he was positive it would only make it worst.

“Well… Thanks… I should go to sleep now. I get really tired after _one of these_. So… night…” Lance meekly turned around, unsure how to part.

Keith panicked. He wanted Lance to go to _their_ bed for sleep. The heat was over. Lance should return to them. So he grabbed Lance’s shoulder but that was the wrong move. Lance spun around, his face painted with panic. His shoulders stiff and his chest rising and falling with frightened breath. Blue eyes wide, glazed and looking not at Shiro and Keith but past them. A sound of sheer fear left his throat: whiney and low.

Keith let go immediately, full of regret.

“S-sorry!”

Blue eyes focused on violet and grey again as Lance realized what he had done. Shame stained his face.

“No… No, I’m sorry. It seems I’m still not good with being touched from behind,” Lance admitted. It was something they noticed, but never pieced together. Lance didn’t react well from being approached or touched from behind. They were too afraid to ask why.

The silence between the three of them was heavy.

“I just… I wanted to say you should come back to us…” Keith was never good with words. He doubted Lance would want to. Not with the way he reacted.

“I think Keith is trying to say is that you’re spot in the bed is still open. If you want it.” He glared at Keith.

“I shouldn’t…”

“Please?” Keith tried pleading.

“I’m better now,” Lance lied. “I don’t need to keep bothering you guys at night…”

“Lance, you never bothered us…” Shiro gripped their jackets tightly.

“No… I think it’s for the best…”

“I… I want you there…” Keith struggled, stopping the words in Lance’s mouth. Lance looked at them, confused. Mouth a jar. Looking back and forth between Keith and Shiro. “Your place is with us.”

His expression saying one thing: _Why?_

“ _We_ want you there,” Shiro corrected. “You don’t have to do this alone, Lance. We’re here for you. We _want_ to be here for you.”

“I don’t…? Why? How could you want to…?” The way it left his mouth pained them. He didn’t believe them. He couldn’t. Not after all the illusions Haggar gave him.

“Because you’re important to us, Lance.” Shiro couldn’t confess his affections. As much as both the alphas wanted their intentions to be pure, they weren’t. They wanted Lance as a mate and all that entailed. Yes, being soft, caring, loving, and reassuring. But there was still desire. And desire frightened Lance. So for now, he foolishly settled for ambiguity.

“I’m not…” Lance saw himself as replaceable. Disposable.

“You are.” Keith’s voice was soft and desperate.

_Please believe us. Please, please, please see what we see._

“We won’t force you. That’s the last thing we want. But I want to be clear, Lance: Never once have you bothered us. We’re doing this only because we want to.” Shiro tried to limit his eagerness.

Lance’s lower lip quiverd.

“I can… I can stay…?” The question was a bit cryptic but they understood.

_Can I stay with you? Is that ok? Even if it won’t be for long?_

“Yes!” The alphas were perhaps too enthusiastic. But Lance didn’t seem to mind.

He gave them a smile. One that was beautiful even if it was still a bit sad.

\---

Shiro woke up the following morning, bleary eyed. He found himself warm and strangely safe. A feeling he rarely had.

He shifted his prosthetic hand. It was always the first part of his body he moved upon waking. As if he hoped one day he would awake to find it flesh, not metal. The mechanical hand thumped and groped something he wasn’t anticipating. It wasn’t that he couldn’t feel with the limb. All the sensations from it were duller and at times hurt him. Whatever he was touching didn’t feel like Keith. It was leaner.

Grey eyes bolted, and looking at the expanse of Lance’s chest. His head rested on the omega’s chest, softly rising and falling with each breath. He looked down to see the messy mop of Keith’s hair, plopped onto Lance’s stomach. Keith’s grip was more extreme. Arms protectively circling Lance’s thighs and a leg curled around him.

And then Shiro remembered. Last night, it wasn’t Lance that woke up with a start. It was him.

Keith tried to ground him, but his nightmare was different this time. He rarely dreamt of his time with Galra. Not since he shared a bed with Keith. Usually it was flashbacks of the ring, covered in blood, not knowing whose it was, holding his weapon in a tight grip, praying they wouldn’t send out more prisoners for him to kill. Other times he was strapped down to a table and they slowly took his limbs away from him.

But last night set him off. It wasn’t him bound to the table. It was Lance.

When Lance should have been startled by Shiro’s shouts, he wasn’t. At first the omega waited for Keith to calm Shiro. But the alpha remembered how after several unsuccessful tries, Lance slowly put his hands on Shiro’s shoulders. It was different from Keith’s approach who would ground Shiro by being firm. Something he needed to pull him out of his nightmare. But in this dream, it wasn’t himself he worried for.

The softness eased him out. Reminded him Lance wasn’t on that ship but with them. He wanted to hold Lance but he was already afraid of what he had done.

_He’ll never want to stay now._

But Lance pulled his head onto his own chest and hummed a song, rubbing circles into Shiro’s massive back.

 _I want this… I want to feel like this forever._ Shiro hoped he could give Lance a fraction of what he was feeling in that moment: safe, wanted, needed.

“I use to do this for my nieces and nephews,” he whispered, patting Shiro’s head as the alpha tried to shy away.

Lance pulled Keith in as well, letting the younger alpha use him as a pillow. They both rested on Lance, having anticipated the omega to be too fragile to bear their weight. Both physical and emotional. But he was strong. Perhaps stronger than the both of them.

And now Shiro was still resting on Lance. He wondered how heavy he was. He didn’t doubt Lance’s strength anymore, but his body was a hulking mass of muscle. Surely he was crushing Lance.

He tried to get up, but found that Lance’s hand was resting against his head. The sleeping omega hummed and hushed him, like Shiro was a child. So he stayed. Nuzzled Lance’s chest and let the heaviness of his eyes sink him into sleep again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In this chapter, I tried to focus on how Pidge and Hunk felt and interacted with Lance. They knew him longest. 
> 
> I also wanted to show that Keith and Shiro can put aside their urges at alphas for Lance. To instill the difference between them and Lance's assailant. 
> 
> The heat wasn't sexy. Or rather, I tried to make it not sexy. I wanted it to be more about caring for Lance than anything else. 
> 
> I also hoped to show that Lance has an incredible capacity to care for others even when he's hurting with the final scene in this chapter. We see that in the show so many times, and it's one of the reasons I'm so drawn to him as a character. He's strong. He's kind. And that's what most of this story is about. Lance's strength. Even when he's cowering and whimpering, I find that the ability to endure those moments are what make people strong. 
> 
> He's healing but it's slow. There are set backs. It's not a straight journey up. But I believe in all the members of Voltron, Allura and Coran included, to be an incredible support group. Even if all of them have their own faults. Because when it boils down to it, even without ships: Voltron is a family. 
> 
> I'm sorry I'm babbling! I hope that even with all the dark parts of this story, you can enjoy it. And that it's not repetitive (I know there's a lot of repeats of trying to convince Lance to stay with Keith and Shiro. I don't want that to be forceful and gross either. Sorry if it is). 
> 
> Thank you.


	4. The Fall

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am absolutely floored by your kindness. I know that this story is dark and can depict violence and sexual assault. It means the world to me that you're all honest with me about the content of this story. I can be a broken record: but if at any moment it seems that rape is romanticized in this story, I will delete it. 
> 
> This might be a bit long. I hope it doesn't upset you. Thank you for reading this.

“Our allies on Planet Follov are under attack.” Allura stood tall at the helm. “They need Voltron.” 

“Everyone, to your lions,” Shiro donned the role of leader. For just a fraction of a moment, all their eyes were on Lance. 

_ Will you fly Blue again? _

But when he didn’t look at them and they all swallowed that question. 

“With me and Coran, this ship will be well protected. No problem.” Lance tried to say that with confidence. He even put in hand gesture to imply how easy it would be. But his arm shook and he looked so tired. 

“Right! Lance and I will guard this castle like a pair of Mirmuds protecting their young! Now off with you lot!” Lance flashed Coran a smile, appreciating how the older Altean spoke with such pride.  

They all headed towards their lions. 

“Wait!” Lance called out. They all stopped, glancing back at the once Blue Paladin. “I’ll see you guys soon, right?” They heard it in his voice. How he didn’t want them to go but knew better than to say it out-loud. 

_ Be safe. _

“See you soon, Lance,” Shiro said with a nod.  _ It’s a promise. _

\---

They landed onto the surface of Follov, but only found a wreckage and silence. Smoke still spiraled through the air. The attack recent.

“I don’t understand, they just contacted us moments ago. The Galra couldn’t have vacated the area so soon.” Allura used the Blue Lion’s sensors for any sign of life, but she saw only emptiness. 

“This doesn’t look good.” Shiro muttered.

“Guys… who's getting the feeling that this is all a trap?” Hunk’s voice quivered. 

And then it hit without a single sound. A pulse that made their lions drop to the ground. 

“What happened?!” Keith shouted. “I can’t move my lion!”

“Me neither! That pulse must have done something.” Hunk tried to get his lion to move.

“I’m taking a look and it seems like we won’t be able to move our lions for about a hour.” Pidge was already scanning and calculating away. 

“We’re sitting ducks!” Keith groaned.

“What do we do?”

“There’s not much we can do and we’re out in the open.” 

“Allura’s right. We’re out in the open and an hour is too long to wait. The King and Queen called us for our help. We’ll have to go the rest on foot. Coran will guard our lions with the ship.” Shiro felt a cloud of worry form in the back of his mind. But he was their leader. He wasn't going to let them down. Not when he had a promise to keep. 

\---

They made it inside the palace. Empty save for the signs of a scuffle. 

“What happened?” Hunk tiptoed around fallen plates and furniture. 

“Do you think the King and Queen are ok?” Pidge smacked her life scanner, but it seemed to be acting up. “Wait!” Symbols blipped on her screen. “There’s someone up ahead in that chamber!” 

“Maybe that’s where they all hid from the Galra?” Hunk moved forward. He remembered how small the little princess was in his arms. But what he remembered more was how Lance weeped while cradling her. Tears streaking down his face. 

“Approach with caution. This could still be a trap,” Shiro held his hand up as a caution. 

\---

The chamber was empty.

“I don’t understand. My scanner still says there’s people here?”

The doors slammed shut. 

“Welcome, Paladins.” A hooded figure appeared in the center of the room. Her voice hoarse and sharp. 

“Haggar,” Allura hissed. 

Sentries and druids flooded the room. The paladins wielded their bayards and fought. Weapons slinging and slashing. Haggar cackling.

“You didn’t bring my favorite toy with you?” she laughed. 

Keith’s head snapped up as he swung at two sentries cornering him. 

“Hasn’t he told you? All the games we played?” 

“He’s not a toy!” Keith slammed the sentries, sending their heads flying. He charged at Haggar, blade pointed forwards without hesitation. But she vanished into smoke.

“Oh his sounds were so pleasant. Not grating like other prisoners.” Her voice behind him. He swung into a faceful of dark dust. “And no matter what game we played and for how long, he never betrayed any of you. The perfect toy that never broke.” Keith saw only red. “The best games weren’t even the ones where I hurt him. And I promise, I cut him many times.” She laughed into his ear. He tried to slice her in two but there was nothingness. 

“Keith! Stop! She’s playing with you!” Shiro knew this game well. “Don’t listen to her!”

“It was the games where I hurt his precious friends that gave me the most delight. How he screamed! How he begged! He thought it to be real.” 

Shiro threw a sentry into a druid, running towards Keith. He knew this wasn’t going to end well.

“Do you know who he cried the most for? Would you like to know?” 

“Shut up and fight me!” Keith growled, agitated that nothing landed. As if hitting her would bring justice for Lance. 

“It was you, Red Paladin.”

A massive hologram screen filled the room. Projected on its surface was Lance, bound to a table, wires and needles sinking into his arms, eyes glowing Galra pink. Screams filling the air in between deep gasps.

“No, no, no, no! Please no! Don’t hurt him! Hurt me! Please… Please! Stop it! Don’t hurt him! Leave Keith alone, please!” Tan arms straining against straps, face red from yelling. 

Keith felt bile rise in the back of his throat. 

“You don’t like the entertainment I provide, Paladin? Then shall I show you what Lotor liked to do? Is that more to your taste?”

Keith charged again, Lance’s cries echoing in the back of his mind.

_ “Don’t hurt him! Hurt me!”  _

“Keith, no! It’s a trick!” 

But he was so close. And she wasn’t moving. She wasn’t vanishing. Standing still. He pressed on, gripping his bayard with all of his being. 

Haggar raised her arm.

Keith’s world went spinning. 

Something in his abdomen seared hot. He felt it tug from the inside. Like his innards were pulled by an invisible thread wrapped tightly around his guts. Legs gave out and he doubled over, unable to move from the pain.

“You never stood a chance,  _ halfbreed _ .”

One more tug and he tore open. A scream bellowing out of his throat before he could stop himself. Writhing against the hard floor, tears streaming out his eyes. Wet hotness pooling around him. 

Everything hurt. His skin burned, eyes prickled, and teeth throbbing. The smell of copper vibrant in his mouth. His body alight with pain. 

“Oh, this is even better than I hoped! You look just like him! Blue won’t be able to look at you. He’ll hate you,” she cackled as Shiro rushed to Keith.

The larger alpha’s hands trembled, unsure from fear as to what to do. Keith’s vision blurred, looking up at Shiro’s silver gaze.

“Give my gift to Blue, won’t you?” Her voice laughing. 

Everything faded to black.

\---

“Keith! Keith, I need you to wake up!” Shiro’s voice through the thick fog of pain. 

“Is he still bleeding?”

“No… the wound… It’s healing?” 

“What did she do? Why does he look like that?”

Keith opened his eyes. The pain fading away and yet everything felt wrong.  _ He  _ felt wrong. 

“Oh thank crow,” Shiro sighed, helping Keith sit up.

“What happened?” 

“You charged after Haggar like a maniac!” Pidge yelled, concern shadowing her harshness.

“Haggar hurt you. You were bleeding out of your stomach but it’s somehow healing.” Shiro’s hand was on his shoulder but it felt strange there. Like Keith’s skin wasn’t his own. It was too sensitive. 

“Healing?” Keith remembered pain and Haggar’s laugh. It had hurt so much. “She said something about a gift…” His vision was starting to clear. 

“About that…” Shiro tried to find the right words. 

Keith looked down, expecting to find red but only saw dark violet splashed across his wrecked armor. His hands touched his side to feel only the slightest gash across his flesh.

But those weren’t his hands. He saw lavender and sharp claws. 

“No…” He felt panic hotter than anything Haggar had done to him. “No!” He looked around himself, searching for anything reflective. And then his eyes landed on a broken mirror at the edge of the room. He tried to stand up but crumbled. Shiro was there to support him.

“Keith… I don’t think you should…”

But he saw it. 

Glowing yellow sclera, sharp fangs, claws, elongated ears, raised black hair.

But worst of all was his skin. It was the same color as  _ him _ . As Lotor. 

Haggar’s words echoed in the back of his mind. 

_ “You look just like him.” _

And he did. 

He couldn’t breathe. 

**“** _ Blue won’t be able to look at you. He’ll hate you.” _

\---

“Hey, Coran…” 

“What is it, m’boy?” 

“Do you think… Do you think I’ll ever be able to be a Paladin again?” 

“Whatever do you mean? You’ve always been a Paladin!” the Altean stood tall, stroking his mustache. 

“They all think I’m not out there with them because I don’t want to. But I  _ do _ . More than anything. I miss how it feels. How it’s like nothing can touch me or pull me down. But Blue won’t talk to me. I’ve tried… She put up a shield.” Lance cradled his arm. 

“Lance…”

“Does she think I’m not fit to be a Paladin anymore? Because of what they did to me? I didn’t have a choice… I didn’t… I never betrayed her. So why… why won’t she let me in?” 

Not once in their captivity had Lance uttered a word of Voltron. No matter what they did to him. No matter what they said to him. He held his tongue. If he was worthless in battle, he could make up for it with his silence. And little did the Galra know, the illusions of his teammates suffering only solidified his resolve. 

_ The won’t touch any of you. Just me.  _

Lance’s face hardened at the memory. 

Coran sucked in a sharp breath. 

“And what about the rest of the team? Do they think I’m lazy? That I don’t want to fight with them? I don’t want them to get hurt…”

Lance was dragged into their war. His back bore the weight of it more than all of them. Both emotionally and physically as evident by the white scars that trailed down the expanse of his back. Lance tried to hide them, but they peeked out from the nape of his neck. 

“Lance, you need time. I’m sure Blue doesn’t want to strain you. You’re healing. I’m positive she doesn’t want you hurting anymore.” 

“You think so…?” Lance didn’t sound convinced but still gave a weak smile. Almost like he was trying to placate Coran. The thought of Lance trying to comfort him from his own torture made Coran’s chest ache. 

“The Blue Lion has always been very protective of its Paladins. It nurtures them. She would never turn her back on you, Lance. No matter what happens. She cares for you.” Lance’s eyes held disbelief. “Lance, She could have picked any of you back on earth. But you were the one she wanted. She chose you. Not Shiro. Not Keith or Hunk or Pidge. You.” He put his hand on Lance’s shoulder to reassure. 

There was a momentary flinch and Coran moved to take his hand back, but Lance grabbed it as it saying  _ “It’s ok.” _

“Thanks, Coran.” And he meant it.

“C… ran…” Static. “Coran!” And then clearer, Shiro’s voice. 

“What is it, Shiro?” He moved to the control panel.

“Keith’s been hurt bad by Haggar. Get the med bay ready! We’re close to the castle!”

“On it!” 

Coran turned around and saw Lance’s face blanche. Eyes wide and pupils narrow. 

“Lance…?” 

But the boy bolted, running as fast as he could to the hangar. 

\---

Shiro held half of Keith’s weight. It wasn’t the wound that made the Red Paladin limp but his body as whole that throbbed. 

“You can’t… you can’t let him see me,” he leaned into Shiro’s neck and spoke through clenched teeth. “He’s going to hate me…” 

“Keith, he won’t…”

“I’m a monster.”

"You're not...!"

The doors slide open.

“Shiro! Keith!” Lance was running as fast as his legs could carry him. His face stained in worry, breath rapid. 

Keith counted his blessings that he was wearing his helmet. He let its face guard appear and cover his face and used Shiro’s hulking body to hide the rest of himself. 

But it didn’t stop Lance from seeing the blood. By now it looked a dirty brown, coating Keith’s chest and legs. Lance ran faster than Shiro could hide Keith. 

“You’re covered in blood! Oh crow, Keith!” Lance reached out to the alpha.

“Don’t touch me!” he hissed. 

Lance's expression was as though he was slapped. Shiro watched the hurt appear on his face. Lance rarely offered to touch any of them. His gesture had been rejected so harshly. But he brushed it off, too worried to be dissuaded. 

“Keith…”

Another spasm of pain wracked through Keith. He stiffened and turned heavy, collapsing when Shiro couldn’t hold him up from writhing. His knees hit the ground and he folded onto himself. 

Lance tried again, kneeling next to the alpha.

“Don’t look at me!” He growled through gritted teeth. His pheromones spiked; dominant and unforgiving. Lance’s eyes stung and his throat clenched. It was repressive and violent. Every part of Lance’s omega body wanted to cower away. 

“Keith, wait…”  _ Don’t push me away. _

“Go away!” Another pulse of pheromones. As if he were trying to physically shove Lance with them.

“Stop being so stubborn!” Lance yelled. His eyes were on the verge of spilling tears. The shouting stunned Keith into silence and docility. He watched as Lance leaned in, looking down at the wound. 

_ Don't look at me! You won't see me! You'll see _  him _._

“There’s so much blood… ” his voice cracked. Lance’s vision tunneled with fear. 

“It’s fine. It’s healing! Stop looking!” He didn’t want Lance to see the violet hue of his skin peeking through his damaged armor. Had he noticed already? Was it too late? 

A soft hand brushed against the skin left bare from the damage. Keith tried to shy away but his body was exhausted. 

Caramel contrasted with lavender. 

“Where’s the wound? Are you still bleeding? What do I do?” he was panicking. Fingertips trembling. 

“Lance, Keith’s going to be fine. The wound’s almost gone.” Shiro kneeled down too. He could smell Lance’s fear.

“He’s not going to die?”

“No, Lance.”

“Keith… take your helmet off.” Lance’s voice quivered, needing to be convinced by seeing the alpha’s face.

“No.”

“Take it off…”

“I’m not taking it off.”

“Please… Please take it off…” The way the omega’s voice almost broke made Keith give in. So soft. So full of wanting. 

He didn’t say anything. Nor stop Lance from tugging at the helmet. And he waited. Waited for Lance to recoil away from him. The rejection would end him.

“Keith…” It was almost a whisper. It held so much sorrow. So much regret. Was he repulsed? Did he see Lotor looking back him?

Keith couldn’t do this. He couldn’t…

Warm arms enveloped him. He found his face in the crook of Lance’s long neck. Lilacs and ocean breeze. One hand wrapped around his shoulder blades, the other cupping the back of his head. Lance held him closer than he ever dreamed the omega would. Like he was the most precious thing to Lance. 

“What are you…?”

“You’re not going to die,” Lance sobbed. “Oh thank crow! You’re not going to die.” It seemed to finally hit Lance. He weeped it over and over, pressing his wet face against Keith’s. Lance only ever wept for his lost child. Yet the alpha could feel hot tears slide down Lance’s cheek. Feel every tremor in Lance’s body. Those tears were for him.“You’re not going to die.”

Keith didn’t know what to do with his body. His own hands felt foreign to him but he wanted to hold Lance too. The pressure of Lance’s body felt reassuring. It felt safe. 

“I thought you were going to die…” Arms tightened. It hurt a bit, but Keith was too stunned and frankly wanted it too much to push Lance off. 

Did he not notice the skin? The fangs? The eyes? 

“Lance, we should take him to the med bay,” Shiro gently put his hand on both Lance and Keith’s shoulders.

“Right… right…” Lance pulled back, sniffling. He was looking at Keith in his entirety. Before letting go completely, he brushed his fingertips against Keith’s hair. An act so tender and kind that it confused Keith.

_ How can you touch me when I look like him? _

And it seemed Lance saw it on Keith’s face. The anticipation of disgust. 

“Your mullet’s even bigger now.” Lance cracked him a shy smile, unsure of his words. There wasn’t a bit of malice. If anything, it sounded almost  _ loving _ . 

Keith didn’t understand.

\---

“It looks like Haggar’s made an imbalance in Keith’s quintessence. It’s caused his Galra genes to present themselves rapidly.” Coren observed the monitor while all of them huddled in the med bay.  

“Is it permanent?” Keith was afraid. How long did he have to look like that? How long would his face remind Lance of Lotor?

“From the looks of it, yes and no. It looks like the expression of your genes are fluid. You should be able to fluctuate between both forms. Perhaps even control it.”

“What changed?” Pidge tried to sneak closer and observe Keith, but the alpha leaned away, finding himself closer to Lance. The omega never once left Keith’s side. 

“I can’t say without knowing what Haggar did…”

“And why did she do that? Why go through all that to do this to Keith?” Shiro had been blinded by fear when he saw Keith in a pool of his own blood. So much that he hadn’t noticed his change in pallor in the first place. 

“She… She’s playing a game…” Lance finally spoke. He had been quiet since they left the hangar.  They all looked at him, expecting more. “She never thought I was important or maybe she thought I was going to die soon.” His words sent shivers down their spines. The memory of the Lance on the screen haunted them. His glowing eyes. His screams. “But she wouldn’t hide her plans from me. She said that if she couldn’t destroy Voltron that she would destroy what held it together.” Lance’s eyes were downcast. “It’s Paladins… and their bonds...” The way he said it and how his posture changed implied that he didn’t see himself as one anymore.

He was stripped of his title. His role. 

\---

Keith tried to shy away that sleep cycle. He didn’t think Lance would take kindly after waking up from a nightmare only to see glowing yellow and violet gazing back down. 

But this night, Lance sought Keith out, finding him in the halls.

“What do you want, Lance?” Keith didn’t mean to sound angry.

“It’s time for… for sleep…” Lance’s ears turned red. 

“So…?”

“You should sleep…” 

“I will.”  _ Just in my own room. Alone.  _

“Where you always sleep.” 

“Lance, no. I’m not doing this.” He watched Lance stiffen. 

“If it’s me… I’ll leave.” 

“What? Lance, no. That’s not why…”

“This was my  _ gift _ , wasn’t it?” Lance hid his face in his hand. 

“How do you know that?” For a moment, Keith forgot what he looked like. He stepped towards Lance. He didn’t understand it when it left Haggar’s mouth and he didn’t understand it now. 

“She’s doing this because I’m not there anymore. She needs something to put a strain on Voltron’s bonds.” That still didn’t explain her choice of words. But from the way Lance’s fists clenched and unclenched, Keith knew not to push further. “So… so just go back to Shiro and I’ll sleep in my room.” 

“Why would  _ you  _ leave? Lance, I’m the one that looks like  _ him _ .”

“Like  _ who _ ?” The omega challenged. Finally, Lance met Keith’s gaze. His eyes didn’t flinch or waver when meeting glowing gold.

“Like… Like him…” Keith faltered under that gaze.

“Like Lotor? Keith, you’re not him. I don’t care what color you are. You’re  _ nothing _ like him.” Lance was unwavering.

“Will you think that when you wake up from a nightmare and you see a  _ Galra _ looking down at you? Even my face is like his!” Somewhere along the lines, they had all agreed to never talk about Lance’s nightmares. But Keith was angry. 

Lance snapped.

“I had to look at his face everyday! I had to smell him,  _ feel  _ him. No one knows him better than I do.” Keith stepped back. He had unleashed something in Lance. These were things he never wanted to hear. “He was on me.  _ In me _ . Until he became a part of me.” 

“Lance…” He didn’t want to know this. It made the alpha is his chest churn painfully. He regretted challenging Lance. 

“Do you think I won’t know the difference? Do you think I’m that stupid?” he spat.

“No… no I just…”

“Do you think I’m that broken…?” Softer now. Almost tired. 

“I just… don’t want to scare you.” It sounded weak leaving his mouth.

“You’re not Lotor. You’ll  _ never _ be Lotor.”

Keith was desperate to believe him. He wanted it to be true.

\---

The tables had turned and this time, Lance brought Keith to Shiro’s room. The older alpha gave Keith a knowing glance. 

The Lance he remembered was just as stubborn as Keith. And he always had a way with the young alpha. Directly or indirectly getting him to listen to reason. That part of him hadn’t changed.

\---

Keith clung to the edge of the bed, deciding not to be close to either Shiro or Lance. It wasn’t because he didn’t want it. But because both of them had suffered by the Galra. How could he ground either of them from their nightmares when he looked exactly like the creatures that haunted them in their sleep?

And yet, Lance seemed to cling to him. The Lance that curled into himself to avoid being grazed or feel the weight of another now reached out to him. 

Keith couldn’t understand it. He didn’t even want to be himself in his own skin. Not when he looked like that. So how could Lance want to be near him when he couldn’t stand it himself?

Shiro didn’t seem bothered either. Just worried for him. The older alpha knew how Keith swallowed his emotion only to let them tear him up. There was only concern. And Keith knew that. But it didn’t make it any easier to accept himself. 

“Mmm… no…” And there it was. Lance’s pained voice. “No don’t…”

Keith slowly turned to face the sleeping omega. He was surprised by how vivid he could see in the dark. His Galra eyes let him see clearly the suffering in the lines of Lance’s face. 

Shiro shifted slowly, waiting to see how he should proceed. 

“No… Keith! No!” The alpha stiffened at his name. The way it left Lance’s mouth. So frightened.

_ I’m hurting him. It’s me that’s hurting him! I’m just a Galra to him. _ His breath became uneven. 

“Shiro… I should go.” He wanted to weep. 

“Keith, wait…”

“No… he’s afraid of  _ me _ .”

“No don’t… don’t hurt Keith. Please! Hurt me. Hurt me, Haggar!” Lance’s arms reached out, grabbing the first thing they touched: Keith. “I don’t care if it’s an illusion, Haggar… Please, I don’t want to see it!”

“He’s afraid  _ for  _ you,” Shiro countered. 

“He wants the version of me that isn’t Galra.”

“Keith…” Blue eyes snapped open. “Where’s Keith?”

The alpha tried to leave the bed, but Lance pulled him down. Blue met with Galra gold. He tried to hide himself but it was too late. Lance had already seen him.

“You’re not dead...”

Keith found himself being pulled in. He didn’t want to resist. 

“You’re alive…” he whispered and buried his face into Keith’s purple neck. The skin was softer now. Almost like velvet. 

_ Does it feel like  _ his  _ skin? _

“She promised me she’d hurt you. That it would be my  _ gift _ . Because I'm a bad omega.” Lance’s thin frame trembled. He pushed his temple against Keith’s. “I’m sorry she hurt you. I did this… This is my fault.” 

Lance was touching him. Willingly and almost lovingly. No fear or hesitation at the glowing eyes or strange skin. Lance saw all of Keith and did not recoil in disgust. 

“Lance, you’re not a bad omega. You didn’t do anything wrong,” Shiro filled the silence. In the dark, he gave Keith a look.  _ Do something. _

Keith didn’t know what to do. So he embraced Lance back. Letting himself sink into Lance’s warmth. 

“I’m sorry…”

“You didn’t do this.” Keith wanted to say the right words but didn’t know what they were. 

\---

That morning, Keith found himself surrounded by Lance’s scent. He cracked open an eye to find his face buried in the omega’s chest. One of Lance’s arms a pillow, the other wrapped protectively around Keith’s torso. The alpha noticed that his own arm curled around Lance. He saw his violet hands gripping tightly onto Lance’s shirt. Claws catching onto the fabric. 

_ It wasn’t a dream. I’m still a monster.  _

Before he could flee, he found himself looking into blue eyes. Keith stiffened. 

_ Don’t look at me. _

Lance gave a soft laugh. A sound Keith hadn’t heard in so long. It seemed Shiro was awake as well. Keith herd the large alpha rustle from behind him. He felt Shiro’s weight press down on him, propping himself up, wanting to see and hear Lance. 

“Your morning mullet hair is bigger now.” Keith swallowed as Lance’s fingers laced through his hair. His touch felt good and Keith almost moaned into it. 

“How… how are you both doing this?” Keith didn’t bother to pull away from Lance. It was futile. He wanted it too much to resist. 

“... What?” Lance’s voice wounded. 

_ Why don’t you believe me? _ But Lance understood. It was hard to believe you could be wanted when you felt reshaped. He ached for who he use to be. 

“I’m a Galra now… You can’t look at me and not see that.”

“You’ve always been half Galra, Keith. Nothing’s changed about  _ who _ you are. And Galra aren’t bad… Just like all people aren’t bad. There was a young Galra that brought me my food. I could tell he wanted to bring me more, but he was afraid to. He was nice. And so are Kolivan and the rest of the Blade...” Lance was rambling.

“Lance is right, Keith. You are still  _ you _ . Even if your skin is a different color. And Coran said you could change back.” 

“You know what I mean…”

“You’re still Keith. Hot headed and impulsive and caring and apparently thick headed too.” There was a smile on Lance’s mouth. A sincere one. 

_ You think I’m  _ caring _? _ Keith was certain he heard wrong. 

“How did you not think I was  _ him _ when you woke up last night…?”

“He never really let me  _ sleep _ in a bed, Keith.” Both Shiro and Keith stiffened at the implication of those words. His admition didn’t phase himself and he seamlessly continued. “Besides, you’re softer. And smell like nutmeg and cinnamon.” 

“Nutmeg… you’re right! I always smelled the cinnamon but I couldn’t name the other part,” Shiro mused as he let his chin sink into Keith’s shoulder. 

“That doesn’t sound like what an alpha should smell like…” Keith grumbled. 

“I think it smells nice… Like my abuela’s  buñuelos. ” Lance yawned while Keith’s face flushed despite its new hue. Lance’s eyes closed, feeling heavy. “Lotor smelled like a dry mountain. Rocks, dirt, heather flowers, and harsh. It was prickly because I wasn’t a very good omega.” Breaths becoming deeper. “He made it hurt… You wouldn’t hurt me, Keith… Neither of you would...” 

“Lance, You’re... You’re a perfect omega. So perfect that I... Lance?”

But he was already asleep. 

“We’ll tell him someday, Keith.” Shiro eased back into the mattress, but let his arm drape across both Keith and Lance. His arm was long and held them both easily. “Nutmeg…” he muttered. “Smells good with Lance’s…” 

\---

“I can’t find Lance.” Shiro scratched the back of his head. “Hunk told me to grab him for dinner.” 

“Told you, or did you volunteer?” Keith dabbed the sweat off his face with his shirt. It was comforting to know that Galra also sweated. 

“Does it matter?”

“He might be in the Blue Lion’s hanger.” Keith remembered finding Lance there before. “I’ll come with you. I’m done training anyway.”

“Are you volunteering?” Shiro teased. His response was a playful shove against the shoulder. 

They were softening. The both of them. There were moments where the weight of their reality would come crashing down. Shiro’s memories of being a Galra prisoner. Keith’s new body and his fear of abandonment. They were managing. They could endure and carry on.

The hole that use to be gaping in their chests slowly filled with Lance. His rare but earnest smiles. The way his voice fluttered after a laugh. How he would sing when he thought no one was listening. All of it–all of him–making them whole. 

\---

The door to the hanger was open. The alphas were about to step in.

“Lance?” It seemed Allura had beat them to it. 

“Oh, hey, Princess. Looking good like always.” The compliment, while genuine, fell flatly out of his mouth.  

“What are you doing here?”

Shiro and Keith paused. Something seemed heavy in the air. Childishly, they hid outside the door, peeking in.

They saw Lance slouch and tug at his hair. 

“Uh… I just… missed her?” he admitted after trying to think of something witty to say. He felt guilty trying to talk with a lion that wasn’t his anymore. Especially to its Paladin. “But I don’t think she feels the same. None of my lines worked.” Lance tried to be playful but sounded wounded. 

“Lines?” 

“Oh yea… you know. She likes being complimented. It makes her rumble. Like she’s purring.” He spoke fondly at the thought.

“No… no I didn’t know that.” Allura looked downcast. “She rarely communicates with me.”

“Have you… Have you tried talking to  _ her _ ?” Lance didn’t want to overstep his bounds. He wasn’t the Blue Paladin anymore. He didn’t think he had anything to offer. Not after being rejected. How could his advice be worth anything?

“I’ve tried discussing tactics. Or communicating about our flights but she’s not very responsive.”

“Oh… uh… She likes when you talk  _ to _ her. Not  _ at  _ her. She’s really chatty. Did you know she talks to the other lions? The lions don’t do that with one another, but she’s always reaching out to them.” 

“No! I didn’t know that! That’s fascinating!” 

“Yeah… just talk to her about  _ you _ . She’ll like that. She’ll like  _ you _ .” 

Allura’s face brightened. 

Somehow Lance was always perceptive. He could find other’s insecurities. Maybe it’s how attentive he was to their voices. Or he saw it in the way their eyes would look down and their shoulders quiver. He didn’t exploit it. Just knew what to say.

“You think…?”

“I’m sure she already does. She’s letting you fly her, isn’t she?” 

And then Allura’s doubts suddenly felt petty. 

“Lance… I’m sure she’ll let you fly her again. She’ll sometimes talk about you Lance. Fondly. That’s how she shows me what to do. With a memory of you. Or when I think of you, she’ll show me how she saw you through her eyes. It’s strange, I feel I know you better now.”

Her words didn’t alleviate Lance in the slightest. In fact, they had the opposite effect.

“She hasn’t told you how I feel, has she?” Lance became tense. He was on the verge of cracking. 

Keith and Shiro leaned in. They didn’t like the shift in Lance’s voice. What was he saying? 

“Lance, I don’t know what you’re referring to?”

“She knows… who I… the ones I… I wanted to be with.” The pauses in his words showed his shame. “Because I don’t think I could stand that. You knowing. Anyone knowing...”

“Be with…? Oh! Romantically! No! Lance, rest assured, Blue hasn’t betrayed your secrets to me.” 

Shiro and Keith were practically plastered against the edge of the door. 

_ Who?! Since when? Who is it? For how long? _

Lance gave an uneasy laugh. “I always trusted her, but she can be such a gossip. She told me  _ all _ about what the other lions say about their Paladins.” Allura leaned in wanting to know more. “Did you know that Hunk isn’t the only one whose puked in his Lion?  _ Shiro’s _ done it too!”

“No!” Allura gasped. 

“Yep! He can’t hold space booze at all!” He gave a gentle chuckle. “And Big Black was  _ so _ worried about him! She hadn’t seen someone do that before. So she pestered Blue about it for days like a new parent worried sick about their baby’s first cold. Blue found it absolutely endearing.”

Shiro turned pink. He hadn’t thought his lion was watching him. Or worried for him.

Allura laughed, imagining both their stoic leader in the act of vomiting and the image of the massive lion fretting for days over something seemingly small. It was easy being pulled into Lance’s pace. His excitement. His affection. 

“And Keith can get bad helmet hair, but he fixes it before leaving his lion. Red told Blue how cute she finds it. He’ll even ask her how he looks. And then there’s Hunk! He will ask Yellow for her opinions on not just engineering, and recipes, but romance about rock ladies too! And Pidge! Oh Pidge likes to imitate us when she thinks no one is looking. She called Keith emo once. Green didn’t know what that meant.” 

“I wish she would tell me these things!” Allura chuckled. She needed this. The lightheartedness.

“She will…” A pause. “Allura?”

“Yes, Lance?”

“If I had to lose Blue to someone, I’m glad it was you.” 

\---

“Who… who was he talking about?” Keith plopped down next to Shiro on the bed. The sound of rushing water came from the bathroom while Lance showered before bed. 

“Keith maybe you’re taking this out of context,” Shiro was just as uneasy. 

“He said the ‘the one he wanted to be with.’ That seems obvious to me, Shiro. I know we’re giving him space. And that he needs it. I know that and I want to give him that. But… But I also know how I feel about him.”

“We can’t act brashly.” Shiro offered a half embrace to the smaller alpha. 

“How is this easy for you?”

“It’s not, Keith. I don’t like how I feel when I think of him with someone else.”

Keith sighed. His ears twitched in agitation. 

“I feel selfish. He’s been through a lot. And everyday I learn another way they hurt him. He couldn’t possibly want to be with anyone. But I still want him. More than that, I want him to want me. To want  _ us _ .”

Shiro nuzzled the side of Keith’s face. He was like velvet now. Keith would have usually shoved Shiro off or pulled away. The alpha inside him never liked being soft. But having Lance close changed that. 

“Me too… We’ll tell him when the time’s right.”

“And when will that be? How long do we wait? How can he possibly forget what happened to him to ever want us?”

“He’ll never forget… But he might be able to heal, Keith. Like I have with you. You’ve given me so much, Keith.” Their faces were close, almost touching. 

The door opened and out stepped Lance. Hair dripping wet and skin slightly flushed. His eyes locked on the alphas sharing a tender moment. He quickly looked away and seemed to shrink.

They didn’t know how Lance could suddenly seem so small. He was taller than Keith and almost as tall as Shiro. But there were moments it seemed like he was vanishing before their eyes. 

\---

Days passed and Keith’s body fluctuated between human and Galra. Some of the castle members would be startled by the change. Not out of fear but surprise. The change was seamless and quick. Claws stretching, ears elongating, eyes glowing. 

Each time Keith would try to hide himself. And each time, Lance would find him. Before Keith would realize it, Lance had him at ease. It didn’t feel intentional or thought out. Completely effortless, the omega would have Keith unravel, shedding off his doubts and worries. 

Maybe it was because Lance had so many younger nieces and nephews. Or perhaps because of how he read people. But the omega swallowed everyone’s insecurities away.

It left Keith wanting more. 

\---

They were all crowded in the bridge around a hologram of Zarkon’s massive ship. 

“From what the Blade has gathered, Zarkon is still weakened from our battle. If we strike now, before he gathers his strength, we might be able to deal the final blow to the empire. It’ll crumble in his absence.” Allura spun the projected version of the ship on its axes, looking for a weakness.

“All points of entry seem to be heavily guarded. There’s no place for us to approach with our lions. Even with the cloak I’ve installed in the Green Lion, once inside, we’ll be out in the open.” Pidge squinted and adjusted her glasses. 

They all stared and stared, frustrated. 

“What if we breach the hull with Yellow? Do a surprise attack like we have in the past?” Hunk always worried for his lion when he barreled through with her. But he knew she was strong and that it was effective.

“That would work if we were going to hop in and out. But we can’t locate Zarkon’s chambers on this map. We’ll have to take our time once inside.” Shiro wanted this plan to work. They needed to be thorough. 

“Why don’t you use the trash chutes?” Lance finally spoke. He had started to sit in on their tactical meetings but spent most of them quiet. “Those are guarded only by sentries. And the one here,” Lance pointed to the hologram and it flickered for a moment, “is big enough to let an arm like Green or Red inside. Use Green’s cloak and you should be able to sneak in during a dump. They have trash tunnel systems throughout the ship and by the looks of it, you can get into the arena from this one.” 

Lance always saw the simplest and most effective course of action. Somehow they always overlooked it. Overlooked him. 

“Why would we want to get into the arena? Isn’t that the last place we want to be?” Keith questioned. 

“The arena’s are full of mixed Galra. Your differences in height won’t be obvious if your faces are hidden.” Lance paused. “And there’s an hall that’s an offshoot from the arena. It’s not on this map, but if you walk down it, you’ll find a lift that will take you to Zarkon’s chamber.” 

There were moments where Lance’s eyes glazed over. Like he wasn’t on the Altean castle ship but rather in a place stained by the colors purple and pink. He would look lost and his hands would find themselves on his stomach–right above his womb. 

“How can you be sure it’s there if it’s not on the map?”

Lance’s face tightened. 

They asked him the wrong question. 

And then panic filled Shiro. The arena. The games. The blood. Lance spoke of them with familiarity. Did they make him battle in the tournaments? Memories flooded Shiro. The splattering of hotness across his face as he swung his weapon. The loud clanging sound of metal meeting metal. The way flesh easily cut open. The burning taste of fear.

“Lance… Lance did they make you fight?” his voice trembled. The alpha in his chest hammering to get out.

“No… Omegas don’t fight in tournaments...” A wave of relief washed over Shiro. “They’re prizes in them.” The relief was short lived. They all paled and looked at him. Their voices frozen in their throats. Lance snapped out of his daze and saw it on their faces. “Oh, uh… But I wasn’t in the arena for long. Lotor pulled me out.” He added it as if trying to make them happy. It felt wrong that he was the one who placated them. 

And that still didn’t explain why he knew the location of Zarkon’s chamber. But they didn’t ask because they didn’t want to know. Their imagination was enough and they weren’t far from the truth. 

“I remember it being off the east side of the arena. I can’t show it to you on the map, but I can take you there on the ship.” 

“Lance, you… you want to go back…? Do you think you can…?” Shiro didn’t want to tell Lance what he could and could not do. But this sent alarms off in the back of his mind. He didn’t want Lance anywhere near the Galra empire. 

“This… this is war. I can’t sit on the sidelines forever.”

“But…”

“I can take you to Zarkon. I know I can do that much.”

“Lance are you sure…?”

“Zarkon gets stronger every day we wait. His empire gets stronger.  _ Lotor _ gets stronger. Let me do this.”

_ Let me fight alongside you. Even if I’m not a Paladin anymore. _

\---

They trained, planned, and gathered intel. Days blurred together. Tensions were high. Anxiety permeated every conversation. But behind that, there was hope. 

_ If we succeed, we can go home. _

_ The spread of the Galra Empire can finally stop.  _

_ We have a chance. This might work! _

_ This war can finally end.  _

_ They won’t hurt anyone else again... _

\---

“That’s strange…” Allura mused. 

“What wrong, Princess?” Shiro looked up.

“There seems to be excess weight in the third dock.” She swiped through projections on her panel, finding nothing wrong. 

“Could it be an error?”

“Not on my watch, son! This ship is in top condition!” Coran sniffed indignantly and tugged on his moustache. 

“The training room is located near the dock. I’ll have Keith take a look.” 

“I’ll go with him.” Something about this seemed off to Shiro. He wanted to ride it off as nerves from their approaching attack on Zarkon.

\---

“Where is everyone?” Lance entered the bridge. 

“Hunk and Pidge are trying to install a cloaking device on the Red Lion, but it doesn’t seem to be sticking. And I have Keith and Shiro checking on something for me.” Allura was busy monitoring readings. “Speaking of those two… Shiro? Keith? Have you found anything unusual?” 

Silence.

“Shiro? Keith?” 

No reply. 

“Ah… you know those two lovebirds. I’m certain they got distracted.” Coran laughed. “Oh the memories of my youth. The times I snuck around…” 

“Coran, please…” Allura sighed. She watched from the corner of her eye as Lance's face dropped. “I’ll go check on it myself!” she huffed, irritated at being ignored by the two Paladins. “Send Hunk and Pidge over too. I want their opinion if it’s a malfunction. I don’t know why I sent those two down in the first place!” 

\---

“It’s taking too long, isn’t it?” Lance was sprawled across the floor, stretching his long limbs. 

“You’re right… I’ll check on their progress. If there’s damage in the ship, we’ll have to address if before mounting our attack.” A few clicks at the control panel. “Princess? How are things looking down there?”

No answer. 

“That’s strange. I’ll check the video feed and…”

On the screen was the images of Allura, Hunk, and Pidge sprawled on the floor. Their bayards lying useless at their sides. 

“What…?” Coran’s face lost color. “Princess! Hunk! Pidge!” He yelled their names and still they were unmoving. 

From the edge of the screen two figures were flung across the room. Five figures clad in dark armor strode up. 

“Who…?”

“Those are Lotor’s generals!” Lance gasped as he felt his heart drop. 

Before Coran could say anything, Lance was already running out of the room. 

\---

Shiro couldn’t move. No matter how hard he tried, he was immobilized. A hooded Galra with blue skin and a tail held him down without any effort save for her palm against his back. 

“Keep him there, Narti,” the one wearing a helmet commanded. 

Shiro yelled as the Galra walked up to Keith and grabbed him by his neck, lifting him up like a toy. Keith’s skin purpled as claws pressed against his neck. He tried to fight but found himself dizzy from the suffocating grip. 

He was about to summon his bayard when the door slid open.

“Put him down! Put him down, now!” Lance burst through. His frame shaking. 

“Now, now, Blue, is that how you greet me after all this time?” The Galra holding Keith slipped off his helmet with one hand. Long white hair cascading around a sharp lavender face. 

Lotor. Lotor was on their ship.

"Did you miss me, Blue?" 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First thing, I'm sorry if this ends on a cliff hanger. This chapter was long. And I'm also sorry if this was just a giant mess. 
> 
> This chapter was about two main things. First: Keith as a Galra and what he thinks that means. I wanted to show that Lance doesn't have prejudice against the Galra. And that he knows who Keith is, no matter what he looks like. Second: Lance as a Paladin. And if not a Paladin, then a soldier that has lost his place. He doesn't know where he fits in but he knows that he wants to fight. He wants to feel like he's in control again. 
> 
> Then there were other things I tried to hit on. I wanted Coran and Lance to interact. In the show, I think Coran has a huge soft spot for Lance. Another relationship that I wanted to develop was Allura and Lance. They're not very close. But I think sharing a Lion has made them closer, both in cannon and in this story. I also tried to show Lance's ability as a tactician too, which I found amazing in cannon and I wanted to highlight that. 
> 
> Hopefully this chapter is tolerable and not just garbled paragraphs.
> 
> Thank you for reading this. And please let me know if you have any concerns.


	5. The Reunion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter: Lance is forced to encounter Lotor. 
> 
> Thank you all for the kindness. For being so open with me. For letting me know what you think. That's so important to me. 
> 
> Writing this has been hard. It's dark. At least... it is for me. But this is a story about healing. About the aftermath of violence and how in the most desolate of times, we can bloom. 
> 
> Thank you for reading this. And if at any point you see me writing something gross, please let me know.

“Stop it! Put him down!” Lance was trembling. His voice faltered with uneven breath.

“I don’t think I will…” Lotor’s fist tightened around Keith’s neck. Talons sinking into flesh. Keith gasped, trying to take in air and swatted at Lotor, his body shifting from human to Galra.

“You’re hurting him! Please… stop!”

“I’ve no reason to stop, Blue. In fact, none of us do. Narti, if you will.”

The blind Galra wrapped her tail around Shiro’s neck. The alpha couldn’t move. Not with her hand pressed against his back. Shiro grunted, trying to resist. To shout. To do anything.

Slowly, Hunk and Pidge regained consciousness. Two generals, one pink, one large, pressed down onto the Paladins. Lance heard them groan.

“Stop it! Ezor… Zethrid, please!”

“Sorry, Blue,” Ezor shrugged with guilt as her foot pushed onto Hunk. There was genuine regret in her voice as though she had a soft spot for the omega. Zethrid also shook her head regretfully as she nudged Pidge. The Yellow Paladin bled from his forehead while Pidge lay limp. Allura remained unconscious.

Lance struggled to breathe. It was happening too fast. He didn’t know where to look. What to do. Who to save. They were all hurting. Hurting because of him.

“Why are you doing this?” Lance looked into Lotor’s glowing yellow and cerulean eyes.

His grip on Keith tightened as his answer.

“I’ll do it! I’ll give you what you want, just stop! Stop hurting them!”

Lotor’s hand eased slightly. Enough to let Keith wheeze for air.

“You know that’s not enough, Blue. I’m a _Galra_ . We’re different from humans. More evolved. You need to _ask_ me for the bond to form.” A grin spread across Lotor’s face and it dawned on all of them what was happening. Keith and Shiro tried to fight but the pressure on their necks increased. Hunk tried to groan out a protest, but ended up coughing under the pressure of Ezor’s foot.

“Will you… will you bond… me?” He was choking on the words. Each syllable stained in shame. But Lotor didn’t look satisfied.

Keith and Shiro tried to howl, but found they didn’t have enough air.

_No! Don’t!_

“Will you make me your omega…? Your mate…?” His tone one of resignation.

And there it was. Lance sold the last of his dignity; traded his freedom for theirs.

His usually tan skin looked so pale.

The Galra prince laughed, shaking Keith like a ragdoll. Legs dangling.

“You’ve been a good omega for once. Now come and greet _your alpha_ like how I taught you.”

“Put… put him down,” he stuttered.

“I will once you greet me, Blue.”

Lance shakily walked towards Lotor. Keith and Shiro struggled until Lance was finally standing before the Galra prince.

The omega rested his palm against Lotor’s chest, steadying himself. His hand twitched against Lotor’s dark armor, feeling the prince’s familiar warmth. Nausea washed over his face.

“Go on.” Lotor was almost giddy.

Lance’s frame seemed so small. His forehead only reaching Lotor’s chin. Lotor straightened his back, creating distance between his face and Lance’s. He was enjoying every moment of this. The omega slowly stood on his toes, straining his neck and back until finally, his mouth became level with Lotor’s.

Keith’s eyes widened in horror. He tried to fight but Lotor was stronger. He watched from where the Galra prince held him. Keith didn’t want to see it but Lance clenched his bright blue eyes shut and pressed his lips against Lotor’s.

Lotor’s pheromones spiked possessively. His scent riddled with desire as a lavender hand gripped soft brown hair and tugged, deepening the kiss. If it could even be called a kiss. From where Keith dangled, he saw how unresponsive Lance was. Saw how Lance’s hands dropped to his side, clenching and unclenching. Nails digging into flesh.

Lance’s scent reacted to Lotor’s, only with distress. The sea salt overpowered the lilac. It was like the ocean filled all of their throats. They were drowning. Drowning in Lance’s fear. A fear so consuming and violent that as alphas, Keith and Shiro found themselves blinded by it.

The alphas in their chests hammering to get out.

_Our omega is hurting. He is afraid. Why aren’t you helping him? Let me go to him._

Lance whimpered and Lotor leaned in, forcing the omega to arch his back and present himself. Keith wanted to vomit as he heard Lotor’s tongue slip in and out of Lance’s mouth. Urgent, obscene wet sounds. Keith struggled once more, only for Lotor to toss him hard onto the floor. His shoulder slammed against the surface. Something cracked and he yelped.

Lance, startled by Keith’s pain, tried to break the kiss, but Lotor was persistent. Now with both his hands free, he grabbed and tugged anywhere he could touch Lance. Like he was swallowing the omega whole with his embrace. Lance could only tremble as he tried to create space between his body and the alpha’s.

Finally satisfied, Lotor pulled back, looking into Lance’s blank face.

“I missed feeling you against me, Blue.” The prince rubbed his thumb affectionately across Lance’s lips. The omega only shuddered. “Ezor, Narti, Acxa, Zethrid… we’re done here.” His hand circled around Lance’s arm and pulled, dragging the Cuban with him.

“What are you…? No!” Keith realized what was happening.

Lance was leaving with them.  

“Why are you doing this? What do you have to gain? Why hurt him? Why not kill us instead?” Shiro growled. His own pheromones aggressive.

“Kill you? No. That would make you martyrs. I’ve no interest in turning Voltron’s Paladins into a symbol for the rebellion. I’m going to let you tear each other apart. You did this. All of you. You gave me him when you abandoned him. And what fools you were for it. I’ll let the guilt destroy you. Voltron will fall apart. The universe’s saviors rendered to nothing.” He tugged on Lance, who followed limply.

Those blue eyes were glazed over. It was like he wasn’t in in his own body.

“Don’t! Lance, no!” Keith called out.

He was going to lose Lance. Again. Just like he lost everyone else. His mother. His father. For so long: Shiro. But this was different. This time, he was watching it happen. He knew why Lance was doing it, but it didn’t stop the sting of abandonment. Didn’t stop the fear of losing another person he loved.

“Lance! Don’t do this! Don’t go with him!” It was hard to say. He was never good with words. Especially when the words mattered the most.

Lance’s gaze locked onto Keith. He offered an apologetic smile. An expression that showed he anticipated this. He knew his time with them was short lived.

_I’m sorry. I wanted to stay._

“Lance,” Shiro called out. “Lance, fight him. You can do it!”

“Lance, don’t go. I need you…” Keith felt tears welling at the edge of his eyes.

The omega stopped.

“We need you…” Shiro added.

For just a moment, Lance resisted Lotor. He lightly tugged back as he stopped to look at the alphas.

It was the wrong move.

The Galra prince grabbed Lance from behind, his fingers slipping down the hem of Lance’s shirt. Lance grimaced. Being touched from the back paralyzed him with memories dredged in fear.

“I _was_ going to make it feel _good_ , Blue. I was going to be gentle. I wanted this to be a good memory for you. But your favorite alphas have made me change my mind. This is going to _hurt_.”

One tug and Lance’s shirt tore off his body. Fabric ripping absurdly loud. The expanse of his chest revealed.

“Who knew letting you wear clothes was so novel?” Lotor chuckled. “Perhaps I’ll dress you up only to enjoy unwrapping you.”

“Don’t touch him!” Keith tried to stand but Acxa kicked him down.

“Should I fuck you in front of them?”

A whine tore from Lance’s throat as Lotor’s large hands raked down his torso. He was use to being forced in front of watching eyes, but not the eyes of his teammates.

“Don’t… please, no…” Lance didn’t care that he was begging. “Not here. I’ll do what you want, just not here!”

“You’re as soft and firm as ever, Blue.” Lotor breathed deeply in the crook of Lance’s neck, ignoring his pleas. “I missed having you under me. Being inside you.” Lance trembled as he recalled the sensation of being held down against his will.

Hot breath ghosted against his neck. Lotor’s mouth open wide, ready to mark Lance. To make the once Blue Paladin his and his alone.

“Lance please… Please, please…” Keith didn’t know what he was begging for. But he knew that tears were streaming down his face. His alpha pride be damned. “Don’t leave me… ”

Lance felt something snap inside him. Felt a tug that was warm and heard a rumble in the back of his mind.

He knew he could do it.

His mind reached for it and it came to his side. His bayard.

Lance spun around. An act Lotor never thought Lance would never do. The omega was nothing but docile for him. Made malleable with fear.

But in Lance’s hands, his bayard came to life, glowing and taking shape. Gold and blue eyes stared back in disbelief as Lance pulled the trigger. The shot propelled both himself and Lotor in opposite directions. Lance found himself standing in front of Keith and Shiro.

“How dare you?!” the Galra hissed. A crack sprawled across his armor.

Lance stiffened. He knew the punishment for this would be severe.

Lotor stood up, gripping his side. He took a menacing step forward. His generals shifting to move. To protect their Prince.

“Don’t!” he shouted. His voice quivering and not very threatening. “His armor’s been compromised. The next shot will kill him.”

“Blue.” Lance didn’t respond. “Blue!” Lotor tried again. “Lance!”

Lance stiffened. Lotor rarely used his name save for moments before extreme hurt.

“You’ve already asked me to bond you, Lance. You cannot take that back. My mark will be on your neck. You _will_ be _mine_.”

“Never!” Shiro growled. Lotor sneered and disregarded the outbreak, looking sharply and Lance.

“Oh… oh do you think they care for you?” Lotor jeered. “No one needs you on this ship, Lance. Not even the alphas you cried for so desperately.”

Lance’s posture only hardened to Lotor’s words.

“They don’t want _you_ Lance. They want an _omega_ to fuck because they can’t fuck each other.”

Lance’s face dropped. His grip on the trigger slackened. Keith and Shiro watched in horror. They could all tell it was a thought that passed through Lance’s mind. That the idea was possible to him.

Lotor found his leverage.

“Oh! So you have thought of it?!” Lotor laughed. “You know they’ll never love you. They’ll never be your alphas. You’re just a hole to them.”

“Lance, no…” Shiro tried but it fell on deaf ears.

Their intentions had been too vague. Pulling Lance into their bed. Holding him. Cradling him. But never telling him why. They never touched him the way an alpha would an omega. They never thought it a possibility. Not with what had been done to him. But they desired… loved him nonetheless. And Lance didn’t know. How could he know?

“I’m the only one that wants you. I _saved_ you.” Lotor made a step forward. “I found you in the barracks. I pulled you from the arenas. From being fucked day in and day out. Did they do that for you?” Lance’s resolve was crumbling. “No. They left you, Lance. And they’ll do it again. I’ll never do that. I own you. I _love_ you.” The same breath that proclaimed Lance as his possession, gave promises of love with such affection that Lance almost believed him.  

Lance clenched his eyes shut.

“Don’t listen to him, Lance… We don’t...” The word’s halted in Shiro’s mouth, like he was trying to speak through molasses. Narti’s claws sank into his back. He couldn’t speak.

“No one but me could love you, Blue.”

An almost sob left Lance’s chest. A sound so broken. So wounded.

He didn’t want Lotor’s love.

But the Galra took another step closer.

“You’re mine. You’ve always been mine. And you always will be.”

“Lance…” Keith stretched out his hand. It was purpled and clawed now, just like Lotor’s. He was certain it was hand that Lance wouldn’t want to hold. “Lance we lo…” Acxa’s foot slammed into his stomach, rushing the air out of his diaphragm and silencing him.

“Lance, Buddy! Don’t listen to him! You’re our friend. You’re our family!” This time it was Hunk. Ezor raised her leg to stomp down but she looked into Lance’s face. He looked so broken. She couldn’t do it. “We want you. We need you,” Hunk continued.

The omega looked back with disbelief.

“Don’t listen to him. You’re their seventh wheel. They replaced you. They left you behind for me!” Lotor hissed. “They took your bayard. They left you behind! They didn’t come for you for phoebs. Not until I let them.” All things that were true.

“Lance, we need you!” Hunk cried. “We love you!”

“We can’t… we can’t lose you again!” Pidge finally spoke from under the weight of Zethrid. “You can do it! Fight him! Fight him, Lance!”

The once Blue Paladin straightened his posture and poised his bayard with confidence.

“Get off this ship or I’ll shoot. And, Lotor, you know I never miss.”

“Don’t do this, Blue. You’re going to regret this. You thought I was cruel? What I have done will appear merciful and kind. Nothing you love is safe from me. And when I have you, I will mark you. Mate you. Fill you with my seed until it is the only thing you can think of. I promise you this.” Lotor was delirious with rage. His pupils narrow and fangs bared. “Come with me and I will forgive your stupidity.”

A part of Lance wanted to go with him. The part of him that was terrified. The part that knew Lotor threats weren’t empty. He knew that when he fell into Lotor’s grasp once more, he would be bound, humiliated, and tortured. But he didn’t want to leave them. Not yet. He would resign himself to be Lotor’s another day. Just not now. Not when Pidge strained under Zethrid’s massive body to call out to him. Not while Hunk was injured but fighting for him. Not when Shiro resisted Narti’s control. And not when Keith was shedding tears for him.

Not yet.

“Leave!” Lance was firm despite the sea of emotions churning in his chest.

“You’ve made the wrong choice.” Lotor spat. He motioned his generals. “We’re leaving. For now,” he added menacingly.

\---

The intruders left. Coran jumped them out of there, creating as much distance before Lotor could mount an attack.

Lance dropped the blue bayard. It clattered onto the floor, returning to its original shape. He slumped onto his knees. Keith and Shiro tried to stand up and go to Lance but the omega starting heaving. Hot vomit rushed out of his mouth. Nothing but stomach acid, burning his throat and making his eyes water. He wretched, trying to gasp for air but only found himself a quivering mess.

“Hunk…” Lance finally stopped throwing up. His voice frail from the strain of vomiting. “Hunk you’re hurt,” he wiped his mouth and limped towards the large beta.

“I’m ok, Buddy. Thank you for saving us.”

Lance was at his side now.

“I didn’t, Hunk. I just made him angry. I should have gone with him. Now he’s going to hurt you all so much more… But I didn’t… I didn’t want to! I wanted to stay with you!” He clung to the gentle giant. “I’m sorry!”

“Lance… You did the right thing.” Shiro approached with Keith behind him. He wanted to touch Lance. To put a reassuring pat on his shoulder. But the closer he got, the more Lance shied into Hunk’s chest. He didn’t want to be seen by the alphas. “For all you know, Lotor wouldn’t have kept his promise.”

“Lotor _always_ keeps his promises.”

“Lance, you couldn’t have become his mate! He’s insane! There’s no way in a million years we would have wanted you to do that for us,” Pidge grabbed Lance’s hand. The omega flinched. He was still able to feel Lotor’s hands on his skin.

“It… it doesn’t matter. We need to take Allura and Hunk to the med bay…” He didn’t want to talk about Lotor anymore. Not after he had sold himself to the Galra Prince.

\---

“Hunk and the Princess have mild concussions and Keith’s dislocated his shoulder, but otherwise Voltron is no worse for wear!” Coran tried to be cheerful. But he had been shaken. Seeing Allura’s unconscious body frightened him. So still. So unmoving. It reminded him of Alfor.

“What happened while I was out?” she asked, tenderly touching the lump on her head.

“Lotor and his generals attacked us. They had us all pinned down!” Hunk explained while shedding his armored plates, getting ready to hop inside a healing pod.

“But then Lance got Lotor to stop,” Pidge added.

“How…? How did you do that?” Allura turned to Lance.

Lance’s chest was still bare and Lotor’s scent clung to his skin like an oily residue. He hadn’t bothered putting on clothes, too concerned over Hunk’s bleeding and Allura’s unconsciousness. But his discomfort was evident in the way he scratched his scent glands, hoping that Lotor’s pheromones would rub off.

He tried to remain aloof but his face darkened at Allura’s question.

“Why did he make you do that? He wouldn’t stop unless you asked him to…” Keith stuttered over his words. He was strangely shy about the idea of bonding. Especially in relation to Lance. When he heard Lance ask Lotor, it sent him into a panic. He couldn’t imagine Lance with anyone other than himself and Shiro, let alone Lotor.

“He’s a Galra…” Lance’s face contorted as he tried to explain it. He didn’t want to acknowledge what transpired between himself and Lotor. “A Galra alpha won't be able to bond an omega unless asked…”

Allura paled.

“Lance… Lance you didn’t…?”

It was the one thing Lance never gave Lotor. No matter how much Lotor hurt him or how he degraded him, Lance never submitted as an omega. The alpha would bite and claw at Lance’s neck until it was bleeding and bruised but he would find no satisfaction. The wounds healed with no consequence. With no bond.

“Lance, please… you couldn’t!” Allura felt nauseous.

He gave her a forced smile, shrugging his shoulders.

“Lotor didn’t bite him. Lance summoned his bayard and shot him down. He saved us all. That was quick thinking, Lance.” Shiro spoke with a bit of pride. Shiro remembered meeting his captors for the first time after his escape. He had been frightened to the point he couldn’t think of fighting back. But Lance had done that for them. He fought back. He did it for them.

“You do not understand. A Galran alpha only needs to be offered once. And it is an offer than cannot be taken back. Next time we might not be so fortunate.” Her blue eyes were downcast. “Lance… how is your omega fairing?” It was a personal question but she had to know.

Lance seemed to shrink at the question. His arms folded over his torso and he felt bare under their combined gaze.

“It’s ok…” he lied.

“Lance, we need to know.” Coran was much softer. Less direct.

“It… it hurts…” He tugged at his hair nervously. “It hurts and I don’t know why? I don’t want Lotor… My _omega_ doesn’t want Lotor! Why is it doing this? Why does it feel like this?” He curled into himself. He was confused. The omega inside him seemed to keen and cry, like it had been abandoned or kicked.

“Inviting Lotor gave his alpha access to your omega. His alpha reached out to your omega. It has a grasp on it now.”

Shiro’s vision momentarily blurred. The anger from his own alpha churned up his insides and tried to take control. But he swallowed it down. An alpha’s rage was the last thing Lance needed.

“How… how do we fix this?” Shiro breathed slowly, hoping his voice wouldn’t betray him.

“We don’t…” Lance sounded so hollow. He knew the consequences of what he had done. He always knew.

“Or rather… we can’t,” Coran corrected. “The only way is for another alpha to establish a bond.”

“Then we…”

“No. No I’m not doing that.” Lance interrupted Keith before the Red Paladin had a chance to propose an idea. “I’ll just hide from Lotor. Maybe I can hope that he’ll get bored of me?”

“That’s not a solution.” Pidge’s voice was softer than usual. “Next time…”

“I get it… I’m an omega. But I don’t want to have an alpha just because I’m running away from another one. It’s not fair. Not to me and not to whatever alpha we find.” The way Lance spoke, it was like Keith and Shiro weren’t alphas that could conceivably bond him.

“What if Lotor doesn’t get bored…” Hunk looked like he was on the verge of tears.

“I’ll deal with it then. I’m a ninja sharpshooter, aren’t I? He won’t get a chance.” It was awkwardly put and Lance didn’t even believe himself. But he offered them all an out. He eased the tension. For a moment, the air was less heavy. They all understood. Under that attempt at light heartedness, there was a message.

_I’m done discussing this. This is my choice._

\---

Coran reset Keith’s shoulder. Hunk and Allura went inside healing pods. Lance fretted over them until Coran shooed him away.

\---

“Where’s Lance…?” Keith plopped down onto their bed. Both the alphas had decided to give Lance space. They were all shaken from the attack. Keith’s shoulder still ached and every now and then, he could feel the pressure Lotor exerted on his neck.

If that’s how he felt, then how did Lance feel? Could he feel Lotor’s mouth on his? The suffocating warmth of Lotor’s embrace? The forceful pressure of Lotor’s pheromones?

“It has been hours… Do you think we should…”

“Go find him? Yes.” Keith stood up.

\---

It didn’t take them long to pick up on Lance’s scent. Lilacs and overpowering sea salt still full of fear lingered in the halls of the castle.

“He’s in his room,” Keith sniffed. His skin still violet and his senses sharp as his fangs. He wasn’t confident that Lance would want to see him. Not when he looked so much like Lotor. But the alpha in his chest was in tune with the omega inside Lance. It tugged at Keith’s judgement.

_Our omega needs us._

They knocked on Lance’s door. The door opened but there was no Lance. Just the sound of water running.

“I guess he’s taking a shower,” Shiro sighed. They sat, waiting for Lance to come out.

\---

“I know he takes long showers… but this is ridiculous,” Keith commented after an hour passed.

Shiro’s gut felt a twinge of worry. He stood up and rattled his knuckles against the door. No response.

“Lance…?” he tried. “Lance are you alright?”

Nothing.

“Lance, we’re coming in. Is that alright?”

Just the sound of water running.

The door slid open.

Through the hot steam, they found Lance sitting on the shower floor, his back resting against the wall. Water rushed onto him. He was unmoving. Eyes open but glazed over. His tan skin, in particular his glands, angry and red.

“Lance?” Shiro didn’t want to startle him. Keith stood behind Shiro, hiding most of his Galra body.

Lance didn’t react to their presence. It was like they weren’t there.

Shiro stepped closer, hot water splashing. It burned his outstretched hand.

“Ow! Lance, this is too hot! Lance?”

“Shiro, what’s happening?”

“I think he’s… dissociating?” The large alpha stepped into the shower. Hot water scalding him and soaking his clothes. He kneeled in front of the dazed omega.

It was hard not to stare at Lance. His body naked. A firm chest. Legs that seemed to stretch on and on. The crook of his waist, perfect for placing hands on. Shiro’s throat bobbed as he tried to swallow away his desire. He could smell the desire emanating from Keith as well. It was strained. The younger alpha was obviously struggling but did his best.

“Lance, I’m going to touch you.” Lance didn’t respond as Shiro grabbed him on the sides of his torso, pulling up. The omega didn’t resist and just leaned against the large alpha’s shoulder. Shiro guided him from out under the scalding water.

Keith was armed with a towel, hastily shoving it over Lance. He didn’t know where to look. Lance’s skin looked so soft and smoothe. Even with the white scars given to him by the Galra.

The alphas carried Lance to his bed, sitting him onto the soft surface.

The sinking of the mattress startled him.

“Wha…?” Raw panic. His body turning tense. The anticipation of being forced blurring his thoughts. But Shiro and Keith gave him distance. “Oh…” Lance’s muscles visibly seemed to slacken when he laid eyes on them. It gave the alphas some satisfaction that Lance trusted them enough to relax even just a bit.

Lance didn’t know what to say. Or what to do. He knew he had dazed out. In fact, he was very aware it was something he did. But until now, he hid it very well. Awkwardly and absentmindedly, he scratched at the back of his neck, right over his angry pheromone glands.

“Lance, don’t…” Shiro wanted to stop Lance’s hand, but touch seemed unwelcome at the moment. He could see red trail marks raking across the sensitive skin from repeated scratching. “You’re hurting yourself.”

“Oh…?” Lance wasn’t even aware what he was doing. He dropped his hands onto his lap. As hard as he scrubbed, Lance could still feel Lotor’s scent and touch on his skin. The smell of dry mountainside and wildflowers brought back memories of being pressed face down into a mattress. Lotor above him. Grunting. Moving. Hurting.

His mouth soured at the memory.

“We should bandage that up, Lance,” Shiro stretched out a hand. Not to touch but to offer. “If it gets infected, the damage might be permanent, Lance.”

“S’fine…” he mumbled. “I can do it…”

“Lance, you can’t see behind your neck.” Keith countered. “Let us…”

Lance was tired. His neck throbbed angrily. And all he wanted was to rub away Lotor’s scent and touch from his skin. What the alphas offered was incredibly tempting. They smelled so different from Lotor. It was gentler and safe.

“Ok. Yeah, thanks.”

\---

Lance half hissed as Keith sprayed him excessively with antibiotics.

“That’s too much, Mullet!” he backed away, only to bump his bare chest into Shiro’s clothed one.

“Why did you scratch so hard anyway!” Keith was distinctly aware that he didn’t know how to treat a wound.

“Oh… Uh… I can still smell _him_ on me. No matter how long or hard I scrubbed.” Lance instinctively raised his hand to his long neck. Keith swatted his hand away.

“You just smell like you. Like flowers and the beach.” Keith was never subtle. Just direct.

“F-flowers?” Lance didn’t believe him. “Lotor said I smell like…”

“Like lilacs to be exact,” Shiro took a deep breath. He didn’t want to hear what lies Lotor fed to Lance. “My mother’s garden had a lilac tree in it. But it wasn’t this sweet.”

But Lance couldn’t smell it. All he could smell was the crushing desolation of Lotor’s dry mountain rock and wilting heather flowers. He hunched into himself, clenching his eyes shut. A wave of nausea flooded him. He could taste Lotor in the back of his mouth.

“Lance… Lance, are you alright?” They could feel it in their mouths: Lance’s distress.

“I want him off me…” he groaned. “I can still feel him behind me.”

Keith’s stomach tightened. “Lance…” he didn’t know what to say. What to do to make it better.

“Can you…? No… never mind.” Lance was about to ask them something. Lance never asked anything of them.

“What?! What do you need? We’ll do it!” Keith overzealous, leaning in.

“No. It’s stupid…”

“Lance, we want to help. Please ask us. Anything. We’ll do it.” Shiro softly dabbed at Lance’s neck, wiping off the extra antiseptic from his skin

“I can feel his scent on me still. Like it’s in my mouth. I know you wouldn’t… You’re both a pair…”

“Lance… do you want us to…?” Keith’s breath trembled. He had an inkling of what Lance wanted. Was he being too hopeful?

“Could you… just this once? Please? Can you scent me?” Lance looked so small between them, curling into himself. “I’m sorry. I know your a pair. I shouldn’t…”

“Yes!” Keith sat up straight. He was being asked by the omega he desired. The alpha in his chest felt so proud. Keith didn’t doubt that Shiro felt the same.

“Lance, of course. Why wouldn’t we?” Shiro was better at hiding his excitement and enthusiasm.

“Because you’re Shiro and Keith?” He peeked up at them. “I’ve only seen one pair this close… and that’s my mom and dad.” Lance was asking for a thing only lovers did. His face was bright red.

“Lance…” They didn’t know what to say to that. Did they confess their intentions? Their feelings? And in doing so drive Lance further away? Or did they let this ambiguous relationship continue?

“Please…? Please, it hurts.”

And their rationality was gone. There was no time to reconsider. Their omega was asking to be scented. Who were they to deny him?

Keith leaned in first. Lance jumped a bit, startled by the sudden motion. But the wave of nutmeg and cinnamon that followed lulled him into ease. The scent soft and yet protective. It enveloped Lance and filled his lungs, rushing the taste of dry mountainside out of his mouth. He found himself softening. Tension leaving him.

Shiro’s alpha wanted to do the same. So he leaned in from behind, but Lance stiffened.

“Wait!” he gasped. “Not… not from behind!” All of the soothing made by Keith’s scent undone.

“Lance, I’m sorry… I…” They had forgotten: Lance didn’t take well to being touched from behind. As much as Shiro tried to hide it, his voice carried the sting of rejection.

“No, no it’s not you!” Lance’s shoulders shook. “From behind… It’s how _he_ liked to…” Lance let the rest of the sentence die. But they all knew what followed.

 _It’s how_ he _liked to fuck me_.

In response, Shiro’s scent rushed out of him. He couldn’t have stopped it even if he wanted to. It was like a haze that surrounded them, smelling like the earth wet from fresh rain and the crushed leaves of autumn. It was like a breath of fresh air for the first time in so long. His and Keith’s scents mingled together, wrapping around Lance.

“Oh…” Lance gasped. He never knew scenting could be so gentle. That it could feel good when coming from an alpha. He had only ever known hurt. His own scent glands tingled. His body wanting to reciprocate. Lance trembled and covered his neck glands with his hands, bending over to hide the ones on his chest.

“Lance, sorry. I got too overzealous…” Shiro was overthinking everything. He had made Lance uncomfortable. Was his scent doing just the same?

“No… It’s just… this has never happened before!” Lance tried to suppress his pheromones. His body ached to respond.

“What…?” Keith couldn’t read Lance, but he could smell the way Lance tried to stifle his sweet lilacs.

“I’m sorry… I’m trying to stop it!” Lance curled in on himself. But it didn’t stop his scent.

“You don’t have to,” Keith nudged at Lance’s hand clamped firmly on his neck.

“No… No you’re a pair.” He winced. “Why is this happening?”

“It’s your omega instinct, Lance. It’s alright. That’s normal.” Shiro was a bit excited. He couldn’t remember the last time he felt like this. Like a teenager on the precipice of his first kiss.

But Lance hardened. “Right… Omega…” His voice dry and so tired.

And then they all remembered Lotor’s words.

 _They don’t want_ you _Lance. They want an_ omega _to fuck because they can’t fuck each other._

“Lance… I didn’t mean it like that…”

“You don’t… You don’t think that do you? You can’t believe Lotor... That we would…” Keith struggled.

“No, no, no. I don’t…” Lance’s face paled. He didn’t want to talk about this. Not when he was naked save for a towel draped across his legs. Not when he was on a bed. And not when he was between _these_ two alphas.

“But you’ve thought it… Haven’t you…?” Keith’s voice was low.

“I…” Lance tried to shy away, but grey and violet eyes looked on him. There was no place for him to hide. “It’s just… confusing is all. I’m not sure how long I was with the Galra. I lost track of time…” It was seven months. “But while I was there, my only purpose was to _be an omega_ . And omegas were… _used_ .” Keith and Shiro held their breath, remembering the things done to Lance in the videos. Remembering the things Lance shouted in his sleep. “I know no one on this ship sees me that way. You’ve all been really… careful.” They tiptoed around him like he was about to break. “But it became a part of me. That being used is my _purpose_.”

How they ached to hear it.

“Lance that’s not…!”

“So sometimes the thoughts just appear, you know? But just because I have those thoughts doesn’t mean I _believe_ them. The two of you… You’re Keith and Shiro.” He gave them a smile that seemed so sad. So lonely. “You wouldn’t use me. You wouldn’t hurt me. You have each other. You don’t need _someone like me_.”

Lance’s scent started to recede. Just like he did into himself. Keith desperately wanted lilacs on his skin. He remembered how it felt. How Shiro had to beg him to shower after two days because he was covered in grime and sweat.

“So I don’t think that you could…That you would... Please believe me…” Lance was the one trying to convince them when it should have been the other way around. It was them that consistently held their tongue. But how could they admit to Lance their affections without making Lotor’s words seem true? Especially now with Lance’s state of undress?

“We do need you…” It slipped past Keith’s mouth before he could realize how it sounded. He let his words be followed by his scent. Thick but comforting. Lance’s scent flared in response. The omega tried to stop it.

He wanted it so much. To feel like he was needed.

“It’s alright, Lance. Just let it go.” Shiro put his hand on Lance’s shoulder, like he had done for Keith countless times.

“You’re not…” Lance tugged at his hair hard. _You’re not mine._

Keith gently pulled at Lance’s hands. He pressed his forehead against Lance’s, just as he had done so many times when waking the omega from a nightmare. But this was different. They were all wide awake and in brightness.

Keith wasn’t one to be affectionate. Not because he didn’t want it–he was starved for it. But because he was afraid of being rejected. When Lance had the opportunity to reject him for his Galra form–after all that had happened to him by the Galra–he didn’t. If anything, Lance held him closer. Lance softened Keith. 

He wanted to do the same. They both did.

“We want to be here for you. We want to do anything to make it easier for you.” Shiro leaned in as well.

“So go ahead…” Keith added. His mouth so close to Lance’s skin.

“But…”

“We trust you. So trust us.”

It came rushing out of Lance like an opened dam. Rich lilacs. Gentle ocean salt. But what made it all so much sweeter was the willingness. The lack of fear.

They had done that to Lance. They made him feel safe. The alphas in their chests were on the verge of singing with pride.

And as a reward, the scent sank into the alphas’ skin.

It was better than anything Shiro had daydreamed of. He had been envious of Keith. And Keith had been both kind and cruel enough to tell him how it felt. But that all paled in comparison with the reality of it. His skin felt so soft. His chest felt so full. And most satisfying of all: he felt like he belonged to Lance. Like Lance wanted him.

Maybe Lance himself didn’t. But his omega certainly did.

Lance’s frame softened into them. His chest rising slowly, breathing in the perfume they would make as lovers.

It made him want to both laugh and cry.

“I didn’t know scenting didn’t have to hurt…” he mumbled as his eyes shut, the exhaustion of everything finally rushing into him. “I didn’t know it could feel good...”

They didn’t want to imagine Lance being forced to take on Lotor’s scent. How corrosive it must have been. Just another thing he had to endure.

So they just held on tighter, wishing they could make everything feel good.

Wishing they could take away all the hurt.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was about meeting you abuser. I wanted to show how powerless someone can feel. But when given the support and love needed, you can overcome it. I believe that humans are resilient. We endure a lot of hurt. Sometimes it's unbearable and we need help. If given that help, we can continue on. 
> 
> I hope it comes across how much I believe that Lance is strong. Or how much his team cares about him and one another. But that doesn't mean facing his abuser doesn't hurt. That it doesn't frighten him. That it doesn't stop hurting once Lotor is gone. 
> 
> As for Lotor: I don't think the character is this vicious in the show. I am actually very fond of cannon Lotor. So I'm sorry I've made him the villain. This version of him is violent and desperate for love to the point he will create pain. But that's no excuse. He's in the wrong. No matter what an abuser is thinking or rationalizing for themselves: it's not ok. This will be addressed later and I'm so sorry if it's been upsetting for any of you. 
> 
> And then the scenting scene... It was incredibly hard. But I thought it was needed. Lance needed to be grounded. But it's hard for all of them. They love him and want him but they're afraid their actions will be too similar to Lotor's. And then there's Lance: who just as earnestly loves but feels like it's not his place. After all: a pair implies that there is only two. 
> 
> I promise reconciliation at some point. But I wanted to show how hard it is for everyone when someone is hurt. 
> 
> I think I'm rambling. 
> 
> Again, please let me know if at any moment I'm romanticizing assault. That's the last thing I want to do. 
> 
> Thank you for reading this. Thank you for the comments. Thank you for giving me your time.


	6. The Memory

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for you kindness. Some of you comments have left me breathless to the point where I don't know how to respond. Thank you for sharing your stories. For reading this story. And again, should this fic ever appear to romanticize assault, I will delete it. 
> 
> This chapter is about loss. And how sometimes we prescribe the blame of events out of our control onto ourselves. 
> 
> There's a lot I wanted to put into it. I'm not sure if it's all conveyed.

There was a Lance shaped space between the alpha pair when they woke up. It instilled a sense of panic in them. They were in his bed, surrounded by his scent. It made his absence ever more prominent.

_Where’s our omega?_

They tried to swallow the longing in their chests. But the blatant ache from the alphas that lived within them throbbed on.

_Give us our omega._

Lance had grown very skilled at slipping away from their grasp. It would have left them feeling unwanted if it weren’t for the fact that Lance’s scent rested on their skin. The scent of a willing omega. But just because the omega in Lance’s chest desired them didn’t mean he did too.

And Lance’s omega was a wounded one. It sulked in his chest like a child abandoned. Lotor’s alpha had been invited to it. Not willingly. But the damage was done. It keened and cried, both wanting companionship and wanting to never be touched again.

\---

“Lance…” Allura’s voice was careful. They were all quiet in their first meal together since Lotor’s presence on their ship. Their facade would break under the weight of words. But Allura couldn’t bear the silence any longer. “I don’t mean to pry. Alteans do not have secondary genders like Galra or Humans. But may I ask…? Why did you conceal your gender?”

They all stiffened. This wasn’t an invasive question for an Altean. They all understood that. But it didn’t make the question any simpler. Any less heavy.

“Princess, on earth we…”

“I didn’t mean to hide it.” Lance interrupted Shiro. His voice soft and full of longing, remembering a time he wasn’t Lance the omega. “I presented late… Everyone thought I was a beta. I mean… I don’t _look_ anything like an omega.” He made a gesture to himself. A large grin found its way to his mouth, but his eyes failed to smile. “I was holding out on being an alpha. I was tall enough to be one… I mean, look at me!” a laugh followed. But all felt choreographed. Disingenuous. “But it turned out I was _just_ an _omega_ …” Words laced with disdain despite his efforts to seem carefree.

Everyone held their breath. Everyone except Allura.

“I don’t understand…” She wanted to. Needed to. Lance sold himself to Lotor for their safety. He exposed his omega to Lotor’s unforgiving alpha. Invited him in. Not yet bonded. But on the precipice of it.

The Lance she had come to know through Blue’s eyes was very different from the image she constructed of him in her mind. It made her realize that she didn’t know Lance at all. She needed to know. To understand the human that bore the weight of her father’s war more than all of them.

“Being an omega, a male omega especially, is… _difficult_ back on our planet.” Pidge explained. “Humans aren’t very… understanding.”

“Is it like the Galra?” The Galra she understood. They were harsh and absolute. But the humans didn’t seem to be that way at all.

“No…” Lance shuddered. “Nothing like the Galra.” His voice betrayed him for a moment. Memories of violence and pain pulsed in the back of his mind. A wave of nausea causing him to drop his spoon.

“Then why did you hide it from us…?” This time it was Keith. He tried not to sound wounded. It was an unfair question and he knew. “Did you think we would think less of you…?”

Lance stilled.

“No… no I never! I… know you guys wouldn’t do that to me. You’re not like Iverson but...”

“Wait… what?” Pidge set down her fork. “ _Iverson_ knew?” Of all the people she imagined Lance admitting his gender to, Iverson was the least likely.

“Everyone that worked at the Garrison knew. Omegas have to be _examined_ and _monitored_.” The way he said the words made it clear it wasn’t a pleasant memory.

Hunk and Pidge exchanged looks. Suddenly a lot of things made sense. Iverson’s blatant disdain. The scrutiny Lance endured. The way he could do nothing right. 

Lance looked down at his hands, clenching and unclenching them. “In the end… Hiding it from you guys was selfish. I just… didn’t want to remember what I was.” Lance looked up, offering a crooked smile. “What I… _am_ ,” he corrected.

“Lance… there’s nothing wrong with you,” Allura wanted to reach out and grab Lance. He seemed so small despite his height. As if with just one breath, he would wilt away from them. His smile just a facade. The pressure on his shoulders seemed suffocating and it hurt knowing she couldn’t carry any of it. She looked pleadingly at Shiro and Keith.

_Say something!_

“I just… don’t like thinking about it. I’m sorry I’m an omega. I’m sorry hid it from all of you.” His tone lighthearted, but his eyes grave.

“No you don’t...! You shouldn’t apologize!” Keith gripped the sides of the table. It made Lance jump. The alpha felt such a rage at the apology. He didn’t know where to direct his anger. At Lance for saying those words? At themselves for not recognizing what Lance was? Or at himself, for letting Lance take the blow that was meant for him in the first place? The blow that rendered him immobile and prisoner for the Galra.

“Lance, being an omega doesn’t change you. It doesn’t make you less of a person. Please don’t… don’t apologize to us for what you are.” Shiro’s words were more thought out than Keith’s outburst. But the sentiment just the same.

“You’re still you, Lance,” Hunk added. He was beside the omega and reached out a hand. Keith and Shiro watched in scrutiny but Lance didn’t flinch at the motion. Not like he would have with them. "That's all that matter. That's all that's important. That you're our Lance." 

Lance tried to give a reassuring look but he just looked so tired. The corners of his mouth barely lifting for a smile.

And they could all see it.

_He didn’t believe them._

How could he? Not after what he was made to endure. What he was forced to do. And all the things he lost. All because of what was inside him. What he was born with.

\---

“Keith… I told you to be more careful when you’re training,” Shiro reprimanded as they headed to the medical bay. A thin but long cut trailed down his arm.

“It’s fine,” he grumbled. “It’ll heal soon…”

“You should still disinfect it.”

The doors slid open and they found Lance lying on a table, his chest exposed and Coran standing beside him. White scars all on display.

Blue and purple eyes locked onto the alphas.

“Oh… Shiro, Keith. What's the matter, my boys?” Coran’s voice clearly tense. Coran and Lance had an air of secrecy around them. It felt like the alphas were intruding.

“Uh, Keith’s arm,” Shiro just pointed.

“Bandages are to the left.” The alphas nodded and shuffled off. They heard Coran faintly “Lance, is this alright?”

“Yeah… it’s fine.” It didn’t sound fine at all. Coran paused. “Really, Coran. I don’t mind. It doesn’t matter anyway…” It seemed like it mattered very much.

Shiro grabbed a fist full of disinfectant and bandages. The two of them sat far away, giving Lance and Coran distance. Shiro sprayed the antiseptic on Keith, who recoiled instantly.

“That stings!” he hissed.

“Lance… this will feel a bit cold.” The both of them tried to resist but peered from the corners of their eyes as Coran pressed something against Lance’s stomach. The omega grimaced, his face tightening as he sharply inhaled.

"S'cold."

Keith swiped off the excess spray onto his pants but listened intently, not even realizing his skin changing to lavender, using his Galra hearing to his advantage.

“Keith…” Shiro warned. But Keith swatted Shiro away.

“How is it?” Keith heard Lance’s voice clearly. There was worry and anticipation. “Is it… can I still?”

“There’s some scarred tissue…” Coran muttered, lost in thought as his eyes were glued to a screen. He rolled the device across Lance’s skin, seeing deep into the history of Lance’s body.

“That’s bad isn’t it?” Keith didn’t need to see Lance’s face to know how upset he was. It was evident in how his voice cracked and the room filled with sea salt. “I can’t…? I won’t be able to…? In the future…?” Lance was breaking. It took all of their restraint to not run to him. “Not again…?”

“Oh! Not to worry, Lance! There is scarred tissue, but you should still be able to conceive.”

The alphas held their breath. Shiro didn’t need Keith’s hearing to understand Coran. They understood the magnitude of Coran’s words.

“What…?”

“There is scarring in your womb, which means there is less space for an embryo to latch onto. But it’s still possible. You can still have a child.” Coran handed Lance a towel to dry his stomach with.

“I… I see…” Lance seemed both troubled and relieved.

“That is… if you want to,” Coran shut down the monitor.

“I’m not sure.” Keith and Shiro couldn’t help but stare as Lance gripped his stomach.

“For now… I can make you a contraceptive if you’d like? It would be an implant.” Coran was careful with his choice of words, doing his best to be delicate.

“Who would want to…?” And then Lance paused. He remembered. There was one alpha that wanted to very much. An alpha that had a choking hold on the omega inside him. “Actually… that… that would be nice.” He slumped for a moment, looking worn and defeated. But most of all, his face lined with hurt.

“Lance… you faced a great deal of pain.” Blue eyes looked up. “More than I could ever imagine. The scarring… the damage.” Coran could read it in Lance’s body. Not just in his skin but deep within Lance’s womb. He could almost see the wounds. The blood that must have spilled out of Lance. The screams that must have left his throat uncontrollably. It would have been unbearable. “I wish you never had to endure any of it. Forgive me, m’boy. We failed you…” Coran’s face scrunched up as he hid his mouth in his palm. “We let those terrible things happen to you…”

“It wasn’t all bad…” Lance grabbed his shirt and pulled it over his head. Coran froze, confused. Lance gently pressed his fingers into his abdomen, letting them sprawl across the taut flat surface. “For a moment, in all of that pain… I had something good.” Lance looked up, and even though Coran was in his line of vision, it was as though the Altean wasn’t there. A smile across his lips. “I was afraid of him at first. Of what he meant. Of his father…” Lance’s eyes seemed to glaze over. “His kicks were so small at first. But he… he made me feel warm. And light. And happy…” Lance doubled over. The memory of loss spilling out of him in a salty aroma. “And he _was_ good… he _would have been_ good…”

Neither Shiro or Keith could sit and watch this. Hear it. Taste it. Lance’s sorrow filled the space in the room. A salty ocean in their mouths.

“My Takashi would have been so _good_ …”

And that was it. They stood up and made their way to Lance, who was curled so tightly into himself, smiling but so sadly.

Coran shifted, to stand between the alphas and Lance. It was instinctive. The Altean wasn’t even sure of what he wished to accomplish with the gesture. Did he not trust Shiro and Keith?

Shiro mouthed a “Please,” but Coran shook his head. The Altean lacked a secondary gender. But the thought of two alphas near Lance frightened him despite knowing it was just Shiro and Keith. He could see in their faces. They had nothing but concern. And yet their approach unnerved him. This one boy had suffered so much already.

“Coran, it’s fine…” Lance hopped off of the stretcher. He smoothed down the fabric of his shirt, fingers lingering on his stomach. “I’m fine.” He flashed them a grin full of teeth. But it faded once Lance saw the disbelief set in their expressions. “I’ll… I’ll be fine…”

\---

Shiro woke up that night in cold sweat. His prosthetic hand twitched as it swam through the sheets, desperately trying to find comfort. But he did not find it. Lance wasn’t there. He bolted upwards looking at the empty space between himself and Keith.

The young alpha was still asleep, his face twisted in a scowl. In his arms was Lance’s green jacket. Keith had a vice grip on it, burying his nose against it, breathing deep the scent of lilacs.

Shiro would have gone back to bed but something tickled the bottom of his lungs. A sensation that something was awry. He let Keith sleep and slowly shuffled off the bed. The pads of his feet hit the cold metal floor of the ship as he softly left the room.

He didn’t have Keith’s Galra senses. He couldn’t track the omega’s scent like the young alpha. And recently, as much as Shiro hated to admit it, his alpha was unable to reach out to Lance’s omega. Ever since Lotor forced Lance to offer himself, it felt like the omega was out of reach. There was a wall muffling it to Shiro. And it made Shiro ache.

So he walked aimlessly through the castle. Shuffling from the bridge, to the dining hall, past Lance’s empty room, until his feet dragged him to the ship’s hangar, where the door was left open. Shiro knew Lance was there. He could smell him. Hear him.

“... and then I made Hunk promise to stretch with me. It was scary seeing him like that. Just not moving under Ezor. Unconscious. I never want to see him like that again.” Lance was kneeling before the Blue Lion, gently conversing with the beast even though its shield glowed defiantly in his face. The blue sheen it cast made Lance look even smaller. Even lonelier. “Stretching isn’t really training but I think it’ll help the team, ya know? They always forget to do it. Especially Pidge!”

“Lance?”

He jumped back and clamped his hands tightly against his neck, hiding his scent glands. Ever since his time with the Galra, Lance would bear his neck in submission when startled. But recently, as if to fight back against the instinct, he would hide his neck. While Shiro understood the gesture’s purpose, it didn’t lessen the sting it gave him.

_Don’t you trust me?_

“Sh… Shiro?” Recognition settled in Lance’s blue eyes. His hands fell back to his sides leaving his neck bare once more. “What’s wrong?” Lance was worried. Why was their leader awake in the middle of the night and in a hangar?

“Nothing. It’s just… You weren’t there…” Shiro mumbled, realizing he hadn’t planned what to say to Lance upon finding him.

Lance cocked his head to the side, lifting an eyebrow. Shiro knew that Lance didn’t see correlation between his absence and Shiro’s late night stroll.

“Why are you… here?” Shiro decided to change the subject.

“Oh… I missed her.” Lance gestured to the Blue Lion whose shield was still up. There was a smile on his mouth. “She doesn’t say anything, but it still feels good to talk to her.” 

His lion’s silence was deafening. Not a purr. Not a rumble. Not even a growl. It was a thick quiet that made Lance feel so small.

“Even if she hates me… Just like all the girls I hit on, ya know?” Lance laughed but Shiro couldn’t bring himself to do the same. Even if to put on the charade of normalcy. It seemed wrong.

“She doesn’t hate you, Lance. She couldn’t…” Shiro couldn’t imagine anyone hating Lance.

“I just want to know what I did wrong.” Lance looked at the beast. It remained unchanged.

“You didn’t…!”

“I want to talk to her. I miss her. She was so similar to my mom.” Lance’s face twitched, instantly regretting his words.

“I know I’m neither your mother or Blue, Lance. But I’m here for you. If you ever need anything Lance, _I’ll give it to you_.” His words were like a proposal of sorts. Almost pleading.

_Ask me and I’m yours._

“No one wants to hear it…”

“Lance, I want to. I want to be here for you.”

Lance seemed to contemplate it. He searched the alpha’s face, trying to decipher his intention. And when there seemed to be nothing but concern, he spoke.

“Nine months…”

“Eh…?”

“Today would have been nine months.” The words seemed to leave a sour taste in Lance’s mouth.

“I don’t…?”

Lance let his fingers sprawl across the flatness of his stomach. And suddenly, Shiro understood the gravity of that time. A cold chill sank in his chest. The expression on Lance’s face made Shiro feel like he was intruding on a private moment. So closed in.

“But I guess I wouldn’t have been a good parent anyway.”

“Lance that’s not…!”

“I mean, _I’m_ still a kid. And what did I think? That Haggar and Lotor would let me be with him?” Words spilled from his lips rapidly. “That I could raise a child in that place?!” His voice rising. “That I could protect him from all that? All _this_?!” Hands gripping his shirt until knuckles turned white. “That he could love me?” Gasping for air.

Lance was having a panic attack.

“He was so small. And covered in blood. _My_ blood. And I couldn’t protect him. Not even when he was still _mine_ and _inside me_.”

Shiro gingerly stepped forward. He had no idea how to make any of this better. Could it ever get better?

Strangely enough, Keith was the one who excelled in this subject with Lance. There was a wall between Lance and Shiro about this child. Like Lance was ashamed he used Shiro’s name.

“I miss him kicking, Shiro. Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night, thinking he’s still there! Like I feel him in me! But when I open my eyes, I’m _empty_! He’s gone! That’s why I’m up now.” Lance’s gaze was suddenly back on Shiro. Such an intensity that it made the alpha freeze in place. “He wanted to live! I wanted him to live! But I killed him! I killed my Taka…” the name died on his lips. Tears spilling now instead of words.

“Lance, no!” Shiro didn’t realize when he had moved to Lance’s side. But his hands were on the verge of touching. He pulled them back, as if it would burn Lance. “You didn’t…! You never…!”

“I loved him! I loved my Takashi! And he would have loved _me_.” The way he said the word, Shiro knew. He knew that Lance though himself unlovable. As if it was impossible.

Shiro couldn’t fathom it. Not when Lance made him feel so much and so strongly. Arms circled around Lance’s waist as he pulled the omega in close. He waited for Lance to recoil or pull away. His hold was soft and easy to break from. But instead Lance put his wet cheek against Shiro’s neck. The alpha felt those soaked lashes brush against skin and the tremors of Lance’s breathing. Uneven gasps for air.

“He was going to be mine…”

“I’m so sorry Lance.” His apology meant nothing. Just words. “I wish you didn’t have to experience any of it…”

“Don’t say that…” Lance quivered. “It hurt… but I’m happy I felt him. I’m happy I loved him. Loved my Takashi.”

Shiro felt Lance’s hot tears stream down his collar bone. The alpha inside him pushed out a soft wave of pheromones. Earthy and refreshing rain. He didn’t mean to, not entirely, but he rubbed the side of his face into Lance’s hair, letting his earthy scent sink into the places they touched.

He wanted to say the words. But feared the reaction they would bring in Lance. And Keith wasn’t there either. They needed to say the words together.

_I love you._

They would promise themselves to Lance. Offer themselves as one.

He couldn’t do it. Not now.

So instead he hushed Lance. Stroked the back of the omega’s head lovingly, hoping his touch could speak in the place of his mouth.

“You don’t… hate me?” The words were muffled into Shiro’s broad chest but he still heard them.

“What? Lance, why? How could I ever?” His hand gripped a bit too tightly. He felt Lance twitch in response and willed himself to slacken his hold. It was hard. Every moment Shiro felt closer to Lance, it was like the omega was slipping away again.

“Your name… I gave it to my child… To _Lotor’s_ …” Lance hated acknowledging Lotor as his unborn son’s father. “Of course you would hate me after that…”

“Lance, never. My only regret is that you lost him… You lost your… Takashi.” It was strange saying his own name. “I don’t know why you would choose my name for something that important Lance but…”

“What?” Lance pulled back. Shiro felt so cold without Lance in his arms. “You have to be joking, right?”

“I…”

“Shiro, I’ve always looked up to you! You’re my hero!”

He couldn’t fathom how. He didn’t see his actions as heroic. Not after being a Galra prisoner in their games for a year. Nor after struggling to be a leader. And especially not after letting Lance be captured by the Galra in his place. A hero wouldn’t have let one of his own suffer. And Lance had suffered more than he could ever imagine.

“I’ve done nothing to…”

“You’ve _always_ been my hero. Back in the Garrison. And even more _now_. Always.”

How could it be possible _now_?

“That can’t be…”

““The only reason I ever wanted to be an alpha was because _you_ were an alpha. I wanted to be like you. You’re strong, Shiro. You’re brave. You’re _kind_. You’re...”

“Lance, I let you down. I let you get hurt… I failed you… I’m a failure of a leader.” He couldn’t listen to this praise. He didn’t deserve it.

“You _saved_ me.” Lance’s body went rigid. He didn’t like being doubted on something he believed so wholeheartedly. But more than that, he didn’t like hearing Shiro berate himself. “Wasn’t it you…? You and Keith that took me out of there?”

“Even so, I’m not worthy. After seven months of…”

“Shiro, I thought I was going to die there.”

It was like a slap. It silenced the words out of Shiro’s mouth.

“I didn’t have Takashi anymore. I wasn’t even sure if any of you were alive either. Haggar played with my head so much.” Shiro remembered. When Lance laid eyes on them for the first time, he had thought them to be just another cruel illusion. “I didn’t have a reason to keep on going.”

Lance didn’t explicitly say it. And he most likely never would. But between the words he hadn’t spoken was the admission:  _I wanted to die._

“But you came for me. All of you. You don’t understand how much that meant. That you found me. That you came for me. So don’t you dare say you’re not worthy.”

While Lance’s brows were furrowed with anger, his eyes were a different story. Bright blue made glassy from tears. Shiro wanted to protest. But he realized it would do more harm than good.

Somehow, he had earned Lance’s admiration. And even though he didn’t believe he deserved it, there was a sense of pride swelling in his stomach. Selfishly, he wanted to be more than just Lance’s hero. He wanted a part of Lance’s heart.

\---

They shuffled back to Shiro’s room. It was a silent walk filled only by the hum of the ship.

Keith was still asleep. He hadn’t moved from the position Shiro left him in. His arms gripping Lance’s jacket and a frown etched deep into his face.

Lance crawled into the bed, barely rustling the sheets beneath him. The instant he lay down, Keith moved closer, as if by instinct alone. Arms releasing the green jacket and instead circling around Lance’s waist.

Shiro watched Lance’s face stiffen. Had Keith been awake, he wouldn’t have touched Lance that way. It was too sudden. Too intimate. But somehow, Lance softened as the young alpha burrowed deeper into his chest. Despite his size, Keith looked like an abandoned child seeking comfort. The scowl on his face vanishing. Shiro saw a smile even settle on Lance’s mouth.

"My nieces and nephews would do this..." he recalled. 

The two of them were a sight to behold. Keith holding tight, his fingers dipping into skin. And Lance letting the alpha find comfort in him. The omega sighing almost affectionately in response as Keith swung his legs over, pulling him closer.

For a moment, Shiro thought of how the two seemed to slide perfectly against one another. Like they were _made_ for each other. Their features and attributes seemed to compliment one another. They were beautiful. They made sense. And suddenly, Shiro became an outsider. He didn’t seem to fit in.

Shiro moved to turn his back on the sight. He didn’t feel like sleeping, but he also didn’t like how this sight made his chest ache. The mattress sank as he started to shift.

But a hand gripped him by his bicep. A hand that seemed comically small against Shiro’s body.

Grey eyes looked back to see bright blue. Lance tugged and Shiro limply followed. He could have easily resisted if he wanted to. Though similar in height, Shiro’s body hulked Lance’s in mass.

Lance didn’t know Shiro had a brief moment of insecurity, but regardless, he quelled the ache in the alpha’s chest. He pulled him in close. A soft grin on his face the moment their eyes met.

“I think he thinks I’m you.” Lance whispered into Shiro’s ear, followed by the faintest, breathiest laugh that made the alpha feel warm. Shiro knew that wasn’t the case-not when Keith was breathing so close to the omega’s scent glands-but let Lance continue tugging. “Does he always swing his leg around you?” His voice danced as he tried to hold back a laugh. Shiro loved how melodic Lance’s whispers were. How he sounded almost happy.

“Not really… He usually kicks in his sleep.” Shiro was still aware of Lance’s hand on him.

“That sounds like him,” Lance mused sleepily. He pulled on Shiro again. It was a soft gesture. Until the alpha was on his side, facing Lance. Shiro gave up trying to pull away. He settled next to Lance, finding himself drawn in closer and closer.

“Shiro?”

“Hm?”

“Thanks for listening to me.” A yawn.

“Any time, Lance.”

“Thanks for letting me be here…” Eyes sinking shut. “Kick me out if I get in the way, will you?”

“You’re never in the way.”

“It feels safe here.” Words slurring together from sleepiness. “And warm.” Lance didn’t let go of Shiro’s arm, not even after falling asleep.

Shiro couldn’t tell if it was his heart leaping or the alpha in his chest. He wanted be warm for Lance. To be safe. To be anything and everything Lance needed. And by the way Keith gripped onto Lance, he knew the younger alpha did too.

\---

Keith and Shiro walked into the training room only to find Hunk and Pidge sprawled on the floor.

“What are you two doing?” Keith raised a brow.

“Stretching,” Hunk groaned as he strained to touch his feet. Pidge on the other hand laid on her back and refused to move. “Or at least trying to,” he sighed.

“Why?” Keith asked as he stripped his red jacket from himself, preparing to summon sentries to fight.

“It’s Lance’s idea,” Pidge sat up.

“Where _is_ Lance?” Shiro asked, finding no Lance in sight. Just the scent of lilacs and salt. It tasted a bit more bitter than usual on his tongue.

“He didn’t look too good. He got all pale and shaky. But he said he’d be right back.” Hunk’s worry permeated his words and showed in the way he fidgeted with his hands.

“I bet it’s because he showed off.” Pidge crossed her arms.

“Showed off?” Interest seeping into Keith’s words.

“Lance just dropped into the splits!” Hunk sat up. “Like it was nothing for him! And we can’t even touch out toes.”

The image stirred something in Keith’s stomach.

“He said you two should stretch more too,” Pidge added with a smirk.

“I’m fine without…” Keith’s words were cut off as the ship groaned and shook. The sound of the engines pulsing broke out through the castle for a moment. Their skin prickled. A sensation that had become familiar.

The ship just jumped through a wormhole.

“What…?” Keith looked up around him. The four of them were still upright.

“Why did we jump?” Shiro muttered.

“Paladins,” Allura’s voice broke through the comms. Her face appearing on a sudden projected screen. “Forgive me for the sudden jump.”

“What happened?” Shiro’s voice shifted immediately to that of a leader’s. Serious and calm.

“I had to make a jump. We were too close to Lotor’s position.”

“How did you know? Did you see him? Did he attack?” Pidge stood up.

“No… No Lance informed me.”

“Is he… is he with you? Is he alright?” Keith didn’t wait for any of the questions to be answered before piling on more. “How did he know? How could he know?”

“He’s on his way back to the training deck…” She paused. “My communication is only being broadcast to this room.” Meaning Lance couldn’t hear them.

“That doesn’t answer how he knew.” Pidge adjusted her glasses.

“His… His omega is very aware of Lotor’s alpha. If close enough, Lotor can use that to his advantage. He can track us. But it also works against him. We can avoid him.”

“But… they aren’t even bonded! He’s not Lance’s mate! Not his alpha!” Keith’s pheromones seeped out angrily from him, even though Lotor was nowhere in sight. “That can’t be possible!”

“It seems just like Zarkon could enhance his connection with the Black Lion by using quintessence from the druids, Lotor can do the same. It broadens his reach since Lance asked to be bonded."

“Is that… is that why Lance looked so sick?” Hunk chewed on his lips. He remembered Lance nearly doubling over. The omega had tried to play it off as nothing. He laughed about eating some bad goo and rushed out of the room. Legs shaking and breath unsteady.

“Yes. But he should be fine now. I’ve moved us several clicks away. Lotor can’t find us. For now.”

“How do we stop him from doing this?” Shiro asked Allura.

“You all know how. By bonding with another alpha.”

All eyes went to Shiro and Keith. The alphas shifted awkwardly.

“No,” Hunk growled. “We’re not forcing him to bond. We’ll be just like the Galra.”

“But you have to admit, it would protect him from Lotor!” Pidge offered. She lost Matt to the Galra. And the way both Lance and Matt seemed to overlap in her mind frightened her. Her brother’s loss became so much more prominent in Lance’s absence. She didn't realize it until Lance was gone. They were so similar. She couldn’t bear to lose both, almost willing to pay the price to keep Lance safe.

“Would it though? Lotor doesn’t seem to care. He’s just taken everything he’s wanted up until now!” Keith countered. Both himself and his alpha angered by the reminder. "Why would bonding stop him?"

He wanted his bond mark on Lance’s neck. Both his and Shiro’s sitting prettily on that tan skin. But he couldn’t have it. He would gain Lance as a possession and yet lose him forever.

“He should bond!” Pidge argued.

“With who?!” Keith’s voice raised.

“With you?! With Shiro?! I don’t know?”

“We can’t…” Shiro tried to step in.

“What, because you’re a pair? Don’t act like you’re not _interested_.”

“What are you trying to say?” Keith’s agitation apparent.

“I’ve seen how you both look at him! Like he’s some piece of meat.”

“I don’t… I don’t _look_ at him!”

“You drag him into your bed!”

“Because we’re helping him! Unlike you!”

“Helping him by what? Rutting against him? You’re _using_ him. At least protect him!”

“Take that back.” Keith’s hand tightened on his bayard. Voice growling and eyes glowing Galra gold.

“Paladins, enough!” Allura’s voice final. “We can’t sit here arguing amongst ourselves. This is exactly what Lotor wants.”

They all stood in silence. Their anger and frustration only silenced by their stubbornness to look at each other.

“Why does it have to be Lance…” Hunk asked softly after the quiet became unbearable. “He’s the Galra Prince! Can’t he get any omega that he wants? Why Lance…?”

“That’s my fault…” Lance was in the doorway now. They all spun around and looked at him like children caught red handed. His face was still. Eyes dull.

“Lance…” Hunk wanted to explain themselves. They were talking about him behind his back. 

“Lotor doesn’t like omegas. He hates them. Thinks they’re weak and useless.” Lance continued, leaning against the frame of the door. “It’s my fault he won’t leave me alone. I did this.”

“Lance, you didn’t…” Shiro felt like a child about to be chided.

“It’s fine if you want to know. I’ll tell you. I’ll tell you why.”

“You don’t have to.” Shiro didn’t want to know.

“No… I need to.”

“Please… you don’t…” Keith didn’t know what he wanted to say. _Don’t tell me? I’m afraid to know? How can you endure this?_ But none of it left his mouth.

“It started in the barracks. Where he found me tied up…”

Their eyes went wide as Lance unleashed his story. A story they only had bits and pieces from passing and the videos they found of him. From the marks on his body. From the way his demeanor had changed.

A story full of hurt.

They listened.

And they hurt too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lance is absolutely NOT to be blamed for what happened to him. And no victim is. But sometimes, we cannot see that we are not to blame. Instead we start thinking "what if I did something different?" or "Is it because I said or did this?" We prescribe the blame onto ourselves because somehow it gives some sort of logic to tragedy. That is what Lance is doing. Assault is the fault of the assaulter not the assaulted. But it's hard to remember at times.
> 
> I spent a lot of this chapter on Lance's loss of Takashi. How it was both something he feared and wanted. And the one who faces the brunt of that is Shiro. Shiro and Lance have walls up that Keith and Lance don't. So I wanted to tear them down a bit. 
> 
> The next chapter will show some of Lance's time with the Galra. It'll have the how and why of Lotor's behavior. But in the end, his actions aren't pardonable, regardless of how much hurt he himself has had. Pain does not heal. It just makes more hurt.
> 
> Thank you for your patience. Thank you for your kindness. Thank you for your words. Thank you you for reading this. And being so understanding with me as I write this dark story. Please, if at any moment you find the content to be idealizing assault let me know.


	7. The Story

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter has depictions of sexual assault and the death of an unborn child. Please do not continue reading if these things will hurt you. I don't want my writing to hurt anyone. 
> 
> It took a long time to write. Because I didn't want to romanticize any of the things that happened. I just wanted to explain why Lotor is how he is but make sure he still bears all the blame for his actions. Please know that I do not think the character of Lotor from the show is capable of anything like this. I am actually very fond of his character and believe him to be capable of being very gentle. 
> 
> I tried to focus less on the physical aspects of the assault and more on the sensations around Lance. If this appears to be romantic or erotic or anything positive, please let me know. Because it's not suppose to be. 
> 
> I am so sorry if this is upsetting. I sometimes wondered if I should write this at all. If I should just delete everything...

“They’ve captured a Paladin of Voltron?”

“Yes, Prince Lotor. The Blue Paladin.”

“How?”

“He was abandoned by the other Paladins.”

“ _Abandoned_. I see…” Lotor rested his chin on his hand. For a moment, he wondered how betrayed this Paladin felt. Did it leave him aching? Lotor knew that feeling well. The hollowness it left behind. “Where is he now, Acxa?”

“Haggar has kept him close.”

“And…?” His tone that of boredom, but his eyes bright with intrigue.

_Tell me more of this Paladin. How could he have been left alone?_

“He hasn’t divulged any information on Voltron. He’s very loyal.”

“She lacks creativity. I’m sure we could get him to sing.” He leaned back. Interest lost in the subject matter, disappointed with Haggar.

“She’s had him for a little over a phoeb. Now he’s in the arena,” Ezor added.

“The arena you say…” Curiosity coming to life in his face once more. “Well then, perhaps we should pay a visit.”

\---

The Galra parted for the Prince as he strode into the arena. Silver hair trailing behind him, a mark of his presence. His generals following close behind.

Sitting amidst the crowd, refusing a throne, he waited. Watched as prisoners fought for their lives with utter desperation. As blades cut across skin with ease. As weapons were tossed aside for the sake of fists. Bodies cracking. Blood cooling. Lives ending.

“Where’s the Paladin?” he growled, impatience settling into his bones.

A nameless Galra stuttered at him.

“Y-your highness…”

Lotor glared at the title he was addressed with, but allowed them to continue.

“ _Omegas_ don’t fight in the arena. They’re _prizes_ in them.”

Lotor’s eyes widened, their gold glimmering in the dim violet light.

“An… _omega_ ?” he tested the word on his tongue. “That’s not possible. Omegas are weak. _Inferior_ . An omega _cannot_ be a Paladin,” he hissed, glowering at Acxa. “You didn’t tell me he was an _omega_.”

“I… I didn’t know!” her skin turning a darker shade of blue.

“I don’t see how an omega could fly a lion of Voltron. Take me to him. Now.” Lotor stood abruptly. Those around him flinching.

He needed to see it to believe it.

\---

The room was dark and smelled strongly of sex. The scent of Galra potent. But amidst it all, something incredibly bitter sat on Lotor’s tongue. It tasted of fear. Of a wounded omega. Pain almost palpable in the air. He scowled as he walked in further.

There was a Galra guard kneeling on the ground. Moving erratically, thrusting between long legs. Grunting. Moaning. Covering an unmoving omega with his large form.

“Enough,” Lotor commanded. The guard didn’t stop. Didn’t even recognize he wasn’t alone anymore. Still moving. Eyes glazed over, lost in pleasure. Lotor’s frown deepened. “Zethrid,” he motioned.

Zethrid’s massive hands tore the guard off as if he were a mere child. His body slamming onto the floor. He clamored up, trying to charge at the limp omega, his arousal prominent between his legs. Mind lost to carnal desires. Saliva spilling down his mouth. Teeth snapping.

“This is why I loathe omegas,” Lotor sighed. His pheromones spiked. Corrosive. Dominant. The guard halted. “They’re weak. But to make matters worse, they turn betas and alphas into utter fools.” The guard knelt, almost unable to breathe from Lotor’s oppressive pheromones. A choked groan escaping his throat. Unable to speak to protest.

The alpha prince didn’t hide his disgust as he approached the omega. His eyes adjusting to the dark with ease, noticing the omega’s state of nakedness. Lying on his side, his back facing the prince. White scars streaming down his spine. Legs covered in blood and semen. Limp and lifeless save for his hands clamped tightly onto his neck. Fingers covered in bloody bite marks. Straining to protect his glands.

“He doesn’t know does he…?” Zethrid wondered aloud. “Galra marks won’t bond him unless invited.”

“He must be so afraid…” Ezor almost seemed remorseful.

Lotor knelt beside the once Paladin. Closer now, he noticed the color of his skin.

An incredibly familiar golden-brown.

The memory of warm brown arms wrapped around him took him by surprise.

Lotor’s heart clenched.

“I… I thought Alteans lacked secondary genders.”

“He’s not Altean,” Acxa carefully answered.

“But… but his skin…” Lotor wasn’t speaking to anyone in particular. His hand shook as he placed it on the Paladin’s shoulder. Warm skin under his palm, making flesh buzz. One tug and omega flopped onto his back.

A face stained in pain. Albeit a beautiful face. Violently blue eyes struggling to stay open. Lips clenched tight, as if stifling a scream. Creamy tan skin. But no markings.

“Why is he bleeding?” Lotor pulled at the short brown hair. He found a deep gash set into the skin, sticky from the drying blood.

Ezor kicked the guard for an answer.

“He… he was resisting! Yelling!” the guard answered. “He’s a fighter. I… I…”

“So you silenced him…” Lotor’s purple hand grabbed the omega’s face. He couldn’t know but his touch seemed alarmingly gentle in contrast to everything else the omega had faced. In response a soft scent pooled out. Floral and familiar. “Azaroths…” his whispered as it filled his lungs.

“What’s that?” Ezor asked, hovering over the Paladin.

“A flower that grew on Diabazaal. Before our planet was destroyed.” He tugged on the omega’s mouth. A bit of resistance at first and then the jaw fell open.

“Is that his omega scent? It smells nice…” Ezor took a deep breath, closing her eyes. Longing to know anything of Diabazaal. Of her home planet that she would never know. “Azoraths,” she murmured.

They all breathed in deep. The scent striking a chord.

“They are… _were_... incredibly common.” But it smelled of home. A smell he had long forgotten. He leaned in further, white hair cascading onto the omega. Draping onto the omega’s face. Soft.

He didn’t anticipate motion. The omega was clearly spent and wounded. But a bloodied tan hand laced itself into his hair. A gesture that was strangely tender.

He was about to pull away and strike the omega when...

“Beautiful.” The omega’s voice was scratchy but still pleasing to hear. Clearly from yelling and dehydration.

Lotor’s violet eyes gazed down at the omega. A faint smile on that tired mouth. A single tear streaking the blood on his cheek.

“Your hair… it’s like snow…” he gave a weak laugh. Tender and fragile. “S’pretty…”

Something stirred inside Lotor. A memory. A longing. Whatever it was, it had been long forgotten. An emotion that was almost comforting. However fleeting it was, it made him feel safe.

It made him feel _wanted_.  

He had never been called beautiful. Never touched so softly.

Lotor’s mind was made.

Before the omega passed out, Lotor grabbed that hand. Teeth marks maring the otherwise smooth skin. This hand was so much smaller than his own and yet dared to touch him.

“This omega… how many have mounted him?” A tremble in his voice.

“I’m not sure, Lotor. But we can observe the video feed,” Acxa answered.

“Well, there’s that guy for sure,” Ezor pointed a pink finger at the guard cowering on the floor.

“Yes. You’re right…” Lotor grabbed Acxa’s blaster and pulled the trigger. A hole sizzling in the guard’s chest. Burnt flesh overpowering the scent of the sleeping omega. “Gather all the others.” He collected the omega in his arms. “Kill them for touching my omega.”

“Y… your?” Acxa stuttered.

“Mine.”

\---

Lance woke up surrounded by water. While the sensation was comforting, the thought of what obscure torture Haggar planned startled him. He bolted up, alarmed to see he wasn’t in his “room” or the barracks. Water splashed around him. Shallow enough for him to sit comfortably.

It was a bath.

“You’re finally awake…” A deep voice followed by the scent of what was unmistakably alpha. Dry earth and yet floral. Like a mountain. Lance shrank against the tub and looked in the direction of the voice.

He was much taller than Lance, but only average for a Galra. A face that was oddly familiar. Like he had seen it in a dream. Lavender skin. White hair. But what stood out most was his demeanor.

Demanding. Absolute. Unforgiving.

“Who…?”

“Who am I? I’m your alpha.”

Color drained out of Lance’s face. He pawed at his own neck, feeling for a bite. Rubbing and scratching, finding nothing.

_Where? Where is it?!_

“Don’t worry. I haven’t bonded you for now. But you’re mine nonetheless.” The Galra walked closer, halting at the edge of the tub.

Lance eyed him wearily. Keeping his palms flat against his neck.

The alpha stared at him intently. Eyes darting across Lance’s face, as if trying to read him. Trying to find something in him.

“Who are Keith and Shiro?” the man asked. “You muttered their names in your sleep.”

Lance didn’t answer but he didn’t have to. Even with his hands pressing on his glands, lilacs pulsed out of him. A scent full of wanting. Lance’s chest ached at the names.

The alpha didn’t like that. This was _his_ omega. He grabbed Lance’s hands and pulled them away. Lance fought. Trying to hide his neck in the water instead. But this alpha was stronger. It wasn’t a matter of omega versus alpha. It was a matter of a human against a towering Galra. He didn’t stand a chance.

“It doesn’t matter who those alphas were. They _abandoned_ you.” The words stung. They were true. “Your alpha’s name is _Lotor_. Remember it.” Pheromones spilling onto Lance. Marking his wrists. Burning his eyes.

“Lotor… you’re! You’re the prince…!” Lance coughed, trying to breathe through the haze of mountainside.

Lotor snarled as Lance continued to resist. The names Shiro and Keith infuriating him. How softly they were whispered. Full of nothing but longing.  

_I’ll make you forget them. You don’t need alphas that will forsake you. Have me instead. I’ll make it better._

He stepped into the tub, despite his armor. Warm water overflowing to accommodate his large form.

“No… no… I don’t want an alpha!” Lance hissed, overwhelmed by how futile his actions were. “Why do you even want me?! Get another omega!” He didn’t care how much this Galra would hurt him. He’d been hurt enough by Haggar.

“Omegas are weak. They’re vile. They’re _manipulative_ ,” Lotor fit himself between Lance’s legs.

“Then why do you want one?” Lance snapped.

Lotor stilled as he gazed into Lance’s face.

Absolute hatred. Lance was hardened by it. Any and all softness from earlier gone.

It had been so long since the prince felt mournful. He wanted that softness. He _needed_ it. How could he get it back?

Lotor had forgotten things like tenderness and affection. He only knew war and disappointment. And for a moment, he had it. It was his. How did it slip through his fingers?

“ _You_ did this. You made me _want_ you.” His voice almost broke. Unbecoming of an alpha.

“I didn’t do anything!” Lance wailed as he heard Lotor clatter and tug at his armor. He knew what was coming. The scent of lilacs turning bitter like an ocean stirring from a storm. Stirring from fear.

Lotor could only think of one way to bring Lance close. If he couldn’t connect their hearts, he would connect their bodies.

“This is all your fault! I’ve _never_ wanted an omega.” Lance felt Lotor press against him. He didn’t have to see it to know how large it was.

“No… no… I can’t anymore… I’m not… there’s no _slick_ , you can’t!”

But Lotor didn’t listen.

He pushed.

Lance screamed.

“You called me…” Lotor moaned. The warmth inside made the bath water seem tepid in comparison. “You… you called me _beautiful_ .” He threw his head back as he sank in deeper. Eyes rolling up from pleasure. “This is your… _your fault_.”

He had never known this feeling. This warmth. This pressure. This wholeness.

Pushing. Pulling. Pushing.

“It hurts…” Lance stopped moving. Each motion only seemed to arouse the alpha further, tugging on the place they were connected. He wanted to vomit.

Lotor looked down at Lance, but was greeted by pure loathing in the lines of the omega’s face.

_Why… why isn’t this working?_

He moved, trying to make it feel good. But his response was only Lance’s body twitching in pain. His face grimacing.

 _“Accept me,”_ the alpha in Lotor’s chest finally wailed. It was a broken call that echoed in Lotor’s body. A beast beaten into submission for thousands of years, contorted and made bitter from quintessence. _“Make me warm_ .” It tried to paw and Lance’s omega. But it couldn’t. He needed to be invited. _“Want me._ ” Hungry for affection. Needing it from Lance. _“Please… please… please…_ ”

Lance looked at him, bleary eyed from the tears he fought so hard against crying. And yet they were spilling. He wanted to be strong. He wanted it so much. But Lotor’s blame had already taken root.

 _You called me beautiful_.

Lotor _was_ beautiful. An angular face made gentle by lavender. Glistening eyes. Pure white hair cascading around him.

Long. Familiar.

Like Allura’s.

Yes, Lotor was beautiful. But Lotor was also cruel.

“I don’t… want you…” Lance whimpered as he felt Lotor churn his insides. Water splashing around them.

“You have no say… you’re to blame,” the prince pressed his mouth onto Lance’s. But Lance was a wall.

 _Let me in_.

“You belong to me now.”

_Be mine._

“This is your fault.”

\---

“You’ve taken my Paladin,” Haggar glowered.

“I’ve taken _my omega_ ,” Lotor stood his ground.

“Your father won’t be pleased.”

His father was never pleased. Always disappointed. Always looking with disdain. But it didn’t matter anymore.

“I still need the Paladin,” she continued. “He has vital information on Voltron. And his quintessence… it’s most peculiar.” She refused to look at Lotor. “He wasn’t yours to take.”

“It seems he has yet to tell you anything. And I’ve seen your… methods.” Lotor had seen the videos by now. The cutting. The hallucinations. The doping of quintessence. His omega’s body was too small for such techniques. Too thin. “They have yet to produce any results.”

“And stealing him away to rut against will?”

Lotor’s face bloomed into a darker purple.

“He’s been mounted several times and it has yet to loosen his tongue. My illusions work far better.”

“He will not be mounted again. Not by anyone else…” For a moment, anger made his pheromones spike. Haggar seemed utterly unphased.

“I’ll let you play with him. But remember, he’s my toy as well. You will give him to me when I summon for him,” she turned her back on him.

“Who… who are you to order me…?”

“It’s been decided by Lord Zarkon.”

Lotor felt like a child being chided. Being made to share a toy he wanted to hoard all for himself.

\---

“No, no, no! Don’t hurt Keith! Please! Please, hurt me!” Eyes glowing pink and lost in an illusion. Quintessence pulsing through his veins.

Each time Lotor heard that name, his anger grew. Chest quaking.

“Keith! Keith! I’m sorry! Please! Shiro, forgive me!”

“ _Your_ omega seems to pine for another alpha,” Haggar cackled, raising her arms. Lance was lifted like a rag doll. The very quintessence in his body holding him up. A gurgling sound escaping his throat.

\---

“I can’t again! You’ve torn it...! Stop!”

Lance’s refusal only hardened Lotor’s resolve.

“Then use your mouth!”

“You can’t expect me to be able to… mmph!”

Lotor couldn’t hear his protests. Nor the sounds made by Lance’s throat, gagging and choking on him. He could only hear two names mocking him.

_Keith._

_Shiro._

“You’ll learn.”

_You’ll learn to love me._

\---

“He’s so small…” Ezor thought aloud, carrying an unconscious Lance to his “room.” Zethrid followed. “I’m not sure how much more his body can take.”

“If he knows what’s best for him, he’ll ask Lotor to bond him.” Zethrid opened the door.

“He’s too stubborn.” Ezor glanced around, looking for anywhere soft to place his body. But there was only metal floor. Cold and hard. Sighing, she delicately draped him on the ground.

Lance stirred, at the loss of warmth. Eyes parting open. About to let out a protest against Lotor.

“Go back to sleep, Blue…”

He slackened at the sight of the two generals.

“Ezor, Zethrid… Thanks,” Lance groaned, rolling onto his side and shutting his eyes, out once again. Relieved to be away from Lotor and Haggar for just a moment.

Both of them stood there for a tick. Their giant forms hovering over this omega that grew smaller by the day. Willowy and worn.

“I… I didn’t think he knew our names…” Zethrid muttered.

“Or that he would thank us.” Ezor added.

\---

“They’ve been in there for three days!” Ezor paced.

“Well… it is their first heat together,” Acxa wasn’t paying too much attention. She was busy staring at a screen.

“He’s not a Galra. Lotor will kill him,” Ezor nibbled her thumb.

A yelp fled Lotor’s room. They all flinched, even Narti.

\---

“After phobes of wasting your time, you’ve only managed to pull two names from this Paladin’s mouth.” Lord Zarkon, while still wounded and in a bed, seemed utterly threatening. His alpha pheromones were unphased by his injuries.

“My sire, I just need more time.” Hagger kept her head low. Lotor remained in the corner of the room in silence.

“And what are those names?”

“Keith Kogane. And our once Champion, Takashi Shirogane. Or rather, Shiro as he calls him.”

Lotor scowled. Those names. Over and over again. Desperately, his omega called for them even though they abandoned him. They threw him aside and yet it was them he wanted.

“Useless,” Zarkon snarled. “A waste of time.” Zarkon eyed Lotor with disdain. “And to think my own son mounting the enemy.”

Lotor held his tongue.

“After all these decaphoebs, you’ve finally decided to behave like an alpha. But you’ve chosen an omega that pines for another alpha. Pathetic. I shouldn’t have expected any better of you.”

\---

Lotor couldn’t bear to look into Lance’s face. Not when they were entangled like how lovers should. The hatred in those eyes always took him by surprise.

He pushed Lance’s face into the mattress. The omega didn’t even protest anymore. His upper body slumped while Lotor held onto his hips.

 _Why? Why isn’t this working?_ _Why don’t you want me?! Be mine. Be mine. Be mine._

Lance twitched and suddenly tried to pull away. He knew better than to try and flee. Lotor held tight. The omega choked out sounds of panic, scrambling to create distance. But Lotor was stronger.

“What do you think you’re doing, Blue?” Lotor hissed. He had taught his omega to obey. This behavior was unnatural.

A pitiful gurgle fled Lance’s mouth as he tried to scamper away again, but he couldn’t. Lotor’s grip was relentless. The prince watched as Lance wretched.

“What…?” Lotor had never seen a body vomit. “Stop that!” His claws sank into hips, as if he could will Lance to stop.

But Lance didn’t stop. He couldn’t. Hot bile spilled past his lips, wave after wave, as he tried to stop it. It pooled onto the sheets. His belly empty save for stomach acid.

“Axca!” Lotor called. “Ezor!” His voice high pitch with fear.

His generals came in. Lotor tugged at the omega, forcing Lance to sit up on his lap. His tan body trembling from expelling acid.

“What’s wrong with him?” Lotor shouted. Panic having overtaken him. “He’s never done this before!”

“I think… I think he’s sick?” Ezor offered. Lance had been withering away. Not just his body. But his eyes becoming dull and lifeless.

Lance tried to cover himself. But his arms were thin and lanky and Lotor was broad and tall. There was no hiding what they had been doing.

A thin groan left his chest as he gave up. Arms flopping to his side, resting on top of Lotor’s thighs.

“Call Haggar… Something’s wrong with him…” A quiver in his words as he stroked Lance’s face.

Lance didn’t want Haggar. He hated the sting of her quintessence. It left his mouth tasting of cold copper. But his eyes were too heavy and the nasua was rolling up this throat again. He leaned back and let everything turn dark.

\---

“What’s wrong with him?” Lotor hovered over Lance, like a child afraid to learn his most precious toy was broken beyond repair.

Lance ignored Lotor’s gaze. Firmly staring at the ceiling. He way too tired to disobey. But these small actions gave him the satisfaction of frustrating the Galra Prince.

“I thought you were foolish before… But you’ve impregnated him.”

Fear flooded the room in an overpowering wave of salt. Lotor could taste the omega’s fear on his tongue. He mourned for the scent of azoraths. And while his omega was consumed by fear, Lotor wasn’t.

For the first time in thousands of years, there was a sense of calm in him. Thick and warm like a blanket.

The prince was given a gift he did not know he wanted.

“He’s… with child?”

“Less than a phoeb. His third heat with you must have taken root. A male is growing inside him.” Haggar’s clawed fingers pushed against Lance’s abdomen.

“No…” Lance weakly protested. “I can’t…” tears streaming down his face. “I can’t have a kid… _I’m_ still a kid…!”

“It seems his body will struggle to keep up with the development of the fetus. Galra develop faster than his species.” She ignored the omega’s tears.

“Will… will Blue be able to give birth to my... our child?” _Our child_. It felt right to him. The words made him giddy as they left his mouth.

But those words made Lance grimace. Lotor chose to ignore it.

_If my bite won’t rest on your neck than my child will sit in your womb. You’re mine now._

Haggar’s hand pressed down further onto Lance. A rapid thudding sound filled the room, echoing and high pitched.

“The child will survive. We’ll have to cut Blue open, but he can easily be put back together.”

“What is that sound?” Lotor asked, as the thudding continued to race.

“It’s the heartbeat of your unborn halfbreed.” Haggar released Lance. The omega sat up with the assistance of Zethrid. Her massive hands supporting his small back.

Lance weeped at the heartbeat. It was such a determined sound. Fluttering like wings. And it was inside him. It frightened him. His body had ceased to be his own from the day he was captured. But this was more intrusive than anything he had felt.

He wanted to scream. He wanted to claw at Lotor’s face. But more than anything, Lance wanted to hate this child. And yet… he couldn’t. Not when its heart thudded so strongly. Almost like it was saying “I’m here. I’m alive. I want to live.”

\---

Lance’s stomach swelled faster than he thought it would. When he wrapped his arms around the growing bulge, it felt like he wasn’t so alone anymore. Like he was being held instead of just pretending that his arms belonged to someone else.

The first time his son kicked, it felt like wings fluttering inside him.

Wings and flight always reminded him of a man with grey eyes and a gentle smile. A man he had tried so hard to forget.

But he couldn’t.

So he gave his son that man’s name.

\---

Lotor tried to be gentle. He had been warned how fragile his omega was. So when he took Lance, he made sure not to draw blood. When Lance weeped, he thumbed away his tears. Instead of berating, he gave words of encouragement. He even forbade the guards from withholding food.

Lance stopped fighting him. Did as he was asked. And while it should have made Lotor happy, it didn’t. It felt empty. Like the look in Lance’s eyes. He couldn’t get a scowl or a glare, let alone a smile.

How he ached to see a smile. To see those eyes look at him like they did the first time they saw  him.

\---

His back was cold and bare but his belly felt warm. His hands circled his stomach. Feeling the faintest flutter.

Tentatively, he hummed. A melody that he remembered easily. Growing bold, he opened his mouth.

“You are my sunshine, my only sunshine.” His throat ached from Lotor’s misuse of it. But continued. Using his voice for anything but pleading and protesting felt good. “You make me happy when skies are grey.” A sound cross between a hiccuping sob and laugh fled his throat. “You never know, dear, how much I love you.” Lips stretching into a smile for the first time in months. Closing his eyes, letting himself imagine hands that never held him. Violet and grey eyes. The smell of rain and nutmeg. “Please don’t take my Takashi away…” 

Lance smelled Lotor before he saw him.

Oppressive. Violent. Unforgiving.

A dry mountainside withered from drought. All its flowers scorched from thirst.

There wasn’t time to hide or bear his neck to appease Lotor. Clawed hands grabbed him by the shoulder and dragged him.

“They _abandoned_ you. And you dare… you dare use their filthy names for _our_ child.”

“No… wait! I didn't…!”

“They haven’t even come looking for you! They don’t want you!” The words burned. No matter how many times Lotor yelled them at him. No matter how many illusions Haggar made. It hurt. It hurt that he wasn’t wanted.

“I wasn’t…!” But Lotor didn’t give him a chance to speak. He threw Lance onto his bed. Lance’s head smacking against the wall. It left him dizzy.

“Your precious alphas don’t care for you.” Legs being pulled apart unceremoniously. “They aren’t even looking for you.” The clattering of armor being shed. “You were disposable to them.” Talons digging into skin. “They could never love you.” His protests being ignored. “You’re a broken omega.”

Lance was dry and tight from fear. Lotor’s intrusion left him wailing. Moving at an unforgiving pace. The differences in their strength never more prominent than now.

“Stop! Stop, you’ll hurt him!”

A lavender hand shoved his face into the sheets, muffling him. Suffocating him. But he persisted.

“No, please! I’ll use my mouth! I don’t choke anymore! You taught me! Please…!!”

“You have _me_ ! You don’t need _them_!”

Searing hot pain. Like a needle poking into his innards.

Lotor’s heavy body pressing down. White hair cascading around Lance. Filling the periphery of his vision. The sheets ensnaring around his wrists. A prison of fabric and flesh.

It hurt. It hurt so much.

“Please… Please, not my Taka…!!!”

Lotor’s teeth sank into his neck. An empty gesture. The mark wouldn’t stay. Lance knew that now.

He never thought that he could hurt this much. He felt wetness seep out of him. Warm and fast. But it didn’t smell of slick.

Something was wrong. Something was very wrong.

There was screaming. Whose voice was it? His throat hurt and tears stung his eyes. He felt the sheets become heavy and wet. Straining his neck he saw it.

The blood pooling on the white sheets. Staining them bright red.

His blood.

The screaming didn’t stop. Wouldn't stop. He wanted it to stop.

“Shut up, Blue! Stop screaming! You did this to yourself! You did this when you made me want you!”

In. Out. In.

“You called me beautiful. You made me love you!”

And then he felt it. The final tear. He knew it was too much. Knew his Takashi’s fluttering legs wouldn’t kick again. That his wings were broken before he ever had the chance to fly. That he was alone once more.

“This is your fault. _You_ did this.”

\---

“You ever look back at yourself? At something you’ve done and try to scream at yourself to stop? I would have given anything to just shut my mouth. It was stupid. I was so stupid… I made him want me… _Me_!” The way he said it, they knew he thought himself undesirable. “Just because I ran my mouth off… I called him beautiful. How could I have…?”

“I can’t…!” Pidge cried. Tears streaming down her face. “I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I can’t…” She hid her face in her hands. “I can’t listen to you talk about yourself this way!”

Shiro and Keith were pale.

“Lance…” Shiro tried. But his voice was dry. The alpha in his chest ashamed.

“You didn’t…” Pidge hiccuped mid sentence. “You didn’t do anything wrong. He… he was insane!”

“I made him that way… The way I smelled. The things I said. The things I gave in and did for him.” Lance couldn’t look at them. “I made his alpha want me.”

“You didn’t!” Hunk wanted to rush to Lance’s side. To grab him by the shoulders and pull him in. He looked so brittle.

“But that’s the thing… I _did_ . I _know_ I did. I can _feel_ it.”

“I don’t… what…?” Keith sputtered. His throat ached and he wanted to say the right thing. But the words dried out of his mouth.

“I can _feel_ him. This thing I got myself into with him… after asking him to make me his mate.” Something he had done only to protect them all. His safety and freedom thrown aside once more for their sake. “It’s like a cheap version of a bond. I know what he’s feeling… No matter how far away I am from him, I _feel_ him.”

Keith and Shiro momentarily saw red. Their vision overtaken not by the alphas inside them, but the raw shame that hounded them. Their inability to protect Lance seemed to mock them at every turn.

“Just because he feels it, doesn’t make it true, Lance!” Hunk stepped forward. Lance didn’t seem to flinch from the approach. “He's wrong. Nothing you said or did deserved that. Or ever could deserve it.”

“But it feels like it… More now than ever. I can’t tell what’s him and what’s me…”

“Then let Keith and Shiro bond you!” Pidge struggled to hold her tears in. Face bright red and glasses askew. “It doesn't have to be both! Just one! And you wouldn’t even have to bond them back!”

“What…?” Lance was taken aback.

“Pidge, that’s not…!” Hunk didn’t want anyone to bond Lance. Not halfheartedly. Lance deserved so much more.

“Get rid of him! So you don’t have to feel the stupid things he’s feeling, Lance. Because you didn’t do anything wrong! You shouldn’t have to keep feeling him! This isn’t fair!”  

“Pidge, wait…” Shiro tried to interject.

“No.” Lance’s demeanor hardened.

“He’s hurting you, Lance and he isn’t even _here_! Let them bond you!”

“Pidge, I can’t…”

“But Lotor…!” She was crumbling. How did Lance bear it? The weight of it seemed crushing and it wasn’t even hers.

“A one sided bond is awful Pidge. This thing I have with Lotor right now… I can feel his emotions but I don’t know _why_ he’s feeling them. Asking any other alpha that would be unfair. It’s intrusive. It’s wrong.”

“So what if you feel what Keith or Shiro are feeling?!” She was desperate to win the argument.

A sad smile sat on Lance’s mouth as he walked up to her, putting his hand on her shoulder to steady her.

“I don’t want to feel anyone resenting me through a bond, Pidge.”

“Lance we wouldn’t…” Shiro felt his face bloom red. How could Lance think they would resent him? “We could never…”

Keith couldn’t talk. It felt like there was no air left in his lungs. What could he say to make it feel better? It felt like anything that could come out of his mouth would only make it worst. His mouth opening and closing. He wanted to say something. Anything. He tried to will himself to do it but his chest swallowed all the words.

“Breaking a pair is the last thing I would do.” Lance shied away. He glanced down. “There’s no way that would be fair. Not to Keith or Shiro. Not to _me_.”

“If… if I was an alpha, I would have bonded you, Lance. I wouldn’t have let this happen.” Pidge buried her face in his chest, smearing tears into the fabric of his shirt.

“Hey… I don’t need an alpha. I’ve got you guys. That’s a hundred times better.”

Her shoulders shook.

“It’ll be fine. I don’t need an alpha. We’ll figure it out. I’ve got team Voltron, right? Defenders of the universe? This is nothing!”

It felt wrong. He was comforting them. It should have been the other way around.

“And I’m not so weak. Give me a gun and pow, pow, pow!” he laughed but it just made Pidge cry harder.

Her small frame shaking.

His laughs started to choke in his throat.

Hot tears streamed down his face. They felt like acid as he tried to hide them.

“I… I didn’t want it… I never wanted it,” he weeped into her hair. It was so soft. “You have to believe me… I didn’t want him. I still don’t.”

“We know that Lance. We never thought otherwise.” Hunk put his hand on Lance’s back. His palm warm and grounding.

He shook like a leaf. Pidge and Hunk holding him. Letting him gasp and heave his tears.

\---

Lance eventually fell limp in Hunk’s arms. The exhaustion of his tears catching up with him. His frame seeming willowy and brittle in the gentle giant’s grasp.

“Is he alright?” Pidge questioned. She was worried.

“I… I think the bond he has with Lotor makes him tired.” Hunk hoisted Lance comfortably in his arms, almost as if the omega were a child.

“It’s not a bond. Don’t call it that!” Keith spoke sharply. “They’re not mates.”

“Well… whatever it is, Lance needs rest.”

Keith stretched out his arms to take Lance from Hunk. Lance’s place of rest was with him. Him and Shiro. But he was greeted with hesitance.

“Hunk…?”

“The thing is… I think Lance should sleep with me.”

“Lance has been sleeping with _us_.” Keith’s posture hardened. His arms outstretched and becoming impatient.

“But maybe it’s time for him to sleep elsewhere?” Hunk was always gentle. To the point that it seemed he would yield to any request. His firmness caught Keith off guard.

“He needs _us_.” Keith felt his something in his chest tighten. A cord pulled taught.  

“But… does he though?”

That cord stretching and stretching.

“What do you…?”

“From where I stand, it looks like you both need him more than he needs you.”

It snapped.

“We’ve been _helping_ him,” Keith felt the alpha inside him beg to snarl and snap. His pheromones heavy and thick. The nutmeg and cinnamon becoming unbearably hot.  

“Hunk, Lance has been improving with our help...” Shiro added. He didn’t like how Lance’s legs dangled from within Hunk’s embrace. Or the way his arms lay limp. His place wasn’t there. It was with them.

“ _You_ can’t help him,” Keith followed.

“But I just did.” Hunk wasn’t phased by the pheromones. “You two just stood there. You didn’t say _anything_ . You couldn’t make it better. _I did_.” Hunk’s grip on Lance tightened when the omega briefly stirred. The pressure lulled him back to sleep.

Shiro’s eyes widened. Hunk’s thick arms seemed to swallow Lance. Grey eyes bore holes into the beta. The alpha’s skin prickling for a moment as his breath became unsteady.

Lance looked cold to him. Lance looked small. Lance looked so far away.

“Hunk, give him to me,” Keith stepped forward.

The beta felt chills run down his spine. But it wasn’t from Keith’s order. It was from the suffocating scent of rain and earth that spread from behind Keith. From an older alpha that they did not expect to ever lash out. And just like that, Hunk was drowning in a hurricane.

Unforgiving. Unloving.

An alpha commanding.

_Come to me._

The beta gasped, almost buckling under the pressure.

“You…? Shiro... are you trying to alpha command me?!” Hunk was incredulous. His eyes glued to their leader. “No…? Not me…? You’re… you’re commanding Lance?!” Hunk hissed as he felt Lance’s body twitch in his arms. The beta saw red. “Stop it! He can’t carry out your command! He’s unconscious!”

But Shiro couldn’t. All he could see was Lance’s unmoving body in arms that were not his or Keith’s. His vision turned dark. The beast inside him spreading like a cloud. Hazing his thoughts. Making his chest sink.

_His place is with me. With us. Return to me._

A groan fled Lance’s throat.

“You’re hurting him!”

Shiro said nothing. But the alpha inside him pressed on.

_Return._

Lance curled into himself. His muscles tightening.

“Stop it!” Pidge shouted. Her voice high pitched, using her small body as a wall between Hunk and the alphas. Her arms quaked.

Her trilling voice startled Shiro. His pheromones halted but still lingering in the air. Steel eyes wide with shock. The darkness fading from his mind. His face bright red.

“I… I…” he stuttered.

“Do you… do you always alpha command him like this?” Hunk’s voice shook in anger.

“No… I…”

“I expected this from Keith but not from you.”

Both the alphas flinched.

Shiro took a step forward, almost pleadingly.

“No!” Hunk shouted. His arms curling protectively around Lance. “You don’t get to come near him. Not after that.”

“Please…” Shiro’s voice almost broke. “I didn’t mean to… I just…”

“You didn’t mean to, but you did,” Hunk’s voice lower but having not lost its edge.

“Hunk…”

“No.”

\---

Keith wouldn’t look at Shiro. His back hunched over and his face in a deep scowl.

“Keith… I’m sorry…”

“No. No you don’t get to apologize!” he growled. “Tell it to Lance!” He was angry. Lance should have been here with them. They could have made it better. He just needed the chance to find the words. He knew it. But now they couldn’t.

Shiro flinched. The alpha in his chest churned at being addressed that way. It already sulked from being denied Lance. But he tried to push it down.

“I didn’t mean to… I’ve never done that before! Please…”

“Don’t… I don’t care!” Keith yelled.

“Let me explain.”

“I don’t want to hear your voice!” Keith’s anger stinging Shiro’s eyes. Hot cinnamon.

“Keith, you know me… I wouldn’t!”

“But you _did!_ ”

“It’s not like you haven’t done it yourself!” Shiro threw back with a growl, his voice finally raising.

Keith’s eyes widened. As if Shiro had slapped him. He remembered it. Remembered how Lance asked him to stop but he didn’t know how. Remembered how Lance used his own scent to calm him and the alpha inside him. But most of all, he remembered the hurt on Lance’s face. Betrayed. Angry. Ashamed.

“I know that…! That’s why I’m so angry!” There wasn’t a moment he forgot. “He looked so hurt.” The rage in Keith’s voice wilted to shame. At what he had done himself. “He hated it. And you… You did that to him when he couldn’t even resist. Couldn’t even carry out your command.”

“It was a mistake.”

“And now he’s not here…”

“He… he’ll be back…”

“You don’t know that. What does he want with two alphas that just push him around? We just… we just hurt him.”

“We… we don’t…”

“But we _have_.”

And Shiro couldn’t deny it.

\---

They tried to sleep but couldn’t. Both of them smelled of anger and there was a distinct Lance shaped emptiness between them.

Keith pointedly faced the wall, refusing to look at Shiro.

His chest felt itchy. He knew it was because Lance wasn’t there. Because of the way Lance cried and he couldn’t open his mouth to say anything. He could hear Lance’s heaving sobs. His groans as he was commanded but unable to obey. He could still see Lance dangling in Hunks arms. And he hated how Lance seemed to fit in them. But most of all, he was angry. Angry at Shiro. Angry at how they both smelled without Lance there. Angry that Lance had been hurt again.

The door slid open.

Alphas jumped into sitting, eyes glued at the entrance as light flooded in, blinding them.

Tall and willowy. Lilacs and sea salt.

Lance.

Shiro raised the lights to see better.

“Lance… are you…?” the words died in Shiro’s throat.

Lance’s vivid blue eyes were dilated black. His back straight. Lips parted.

There was something different. Something silent and untamed. Something raw.

“Lance…?” Keith questioned.

“That’s… That’s not Lance.” Shiro shuddered as Lance took a step forward. “Not… not _all_ of him.”

A wave of pheromones pinned the alphas down. They fell limp onto the bed as rich lilac sank deep into their lungs.

They tried to move but couldn't. There was an invisible weight pressing down on their shoulders and legs. It made them drowsy. It made them malleable. It made them want to please. The alphas wanted to drown in an ocean of lilacs.

“This is… his omega!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, I want to apologize for this chapter... 
> 
> And to thank you all for your gentle and kind words. So many of you have told me things I'm not worthy of hearing. Thank you. 
> 
> I hope my intentions have been conveyed. How I wanted to show how strong Lance is despite what he has endured. That those around him really care for him but are painfully aware that they don't know how to help. But I'd like to think that trying is better than nothing. 
> 
> Shiro made a mistake this chapter. He will redeem himself, I promise. 
> 
> The next chapter will hopefully have their attack against Zarkon that they've been planning. I intend to make Keith and Shiro's intentions clear. 
> 
> Thank you for reading this.

**Author's Note:**

> This is a drastic difference between my YOI stories. 
> 
> If you find this to be awful and just plain crude: I will delete it. 
> 
> I genuinely love all the characters of Voltron. Even Lotor, who I have turned into a villain. I don't know what drove me to write this, to have Lance bear the brunt of so much suffering. I think I see him as the strongest character of them all. And I wanted to show how strong he was. But this might be too twisted? Depending on your reactions, I will gauge whether or not to proceed. 
> 
> Thank you for reading.


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